- Anti Joke

knock knock who's there? Dave Dave who? Dave proceeds to break into tears as his grandmother's alzheimers has progressed to the point where she no longer remembers him.

What did the little boy with no arms and legs get for Christmas? Cancer.

Knock knock. Who's there? The mailman. I don't believe you.

A white guy, a black guy, an Asian guy, and a Hispanic guy walks into a bar. The white guy orders a beer, the black guy orders a shot of vodka, the Asian guy orders a sake, and the Hispanic guy orders a shot of tequila. They were drinking and having a great time.

your mom.

What is the difference between my right hand and my left hand? I used my right hand to stab your mother.

i am not a pothead!!! the only time ive evr been high was springbreak last year!!! mm hmm... wat were u doin over spring break to get high? i had jaw surgery and the doctor had me on tons of painkillers

Yo mama so dirty when she takes baths there are rings.

When life hands you lemons you can't make lemonade, Sugar and Water are two other key ingredients that were not included with the lemons.

What did the sad orphan with liver cancer get for Christmas? Pictures of dead babies to put things in perspective.

A king's son's birthday was coming up and the king asked,"Son i'm the king. You can have anything you want." And the son said,"Oh i'll have some purple ping pong balls." For his birthday he got a rollar coster, a pizzaria, a new car, and of corse, some purple ping pong balls. The next year the king asked,"Son, i'm the king, you can have anything you want." and the son said,"Oh i'll have some purple ping pong balls." And for his birthday he got a manchin, an iphone, a water park, and of corse some purple ping pong balls. One day, the prince was driving in his car and was in a terrible car accadent. On his death bed, his father asked him one final question,"Son, why did you want all of those purple ping pong balls?" And the son answered,"Well, i wanted all of them because-" and then he died.

What's better than winning a gold medal in the paralympics? Walking.

What is white and can't climb trees? Toothpaste.

A man takes a bite into a tuna casserole and burns his tounge. He is also a hermaphradite.

Knock knock. Knock knock. Knock knock. I'm hammering nails. Knock knock.

What word is 7 letters long, is composed of the letters N,G,G,E,R, and S, and stands for a group of people who annoy the crap out of you? NAGGERS.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops

Why did Humpty Dumpty fall off the wall? The wall was unstable and not to be sat on.

Why didn't Jacob marry Bella from Twilight? You have to be real to marry someone

Why did the man commit suicide? Because he felt he had nothing left to live for

What is similar between the Holocaust and soccer? They both suck.

Why are rich guys gay? Because they hang around other rich guys

What did the librarian say at the heavy metal concert? Shhhhh

what's white and sticky semen

What do you call a mailman who doesn't deliver mail? Unemployed