Why does Hilter hate Jews? He's incapable of hating because he's dead.

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Why did piglet look down the toilet for pooh? He had a horrible mental illness

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How do you wake up lady gaga? First you simply whisper in her ear telling her to wake up. If she doesn't, simultaneously whisper and tap her gently. If you have failed to achieve your accomplished goal, repeat step two however intensely touch her and project your voice when telling her to wake up. Step three, get a... WAIT WAIT!! I just waisted 20 seconds of your life, you're never going to meet her.

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Q: What are the best kind of jokes? A: The funny ones.

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a man walks into a bar, when he leaves he thinks he can hold his liquor and kills a mother and two children attempting to drive home.

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What did Sherlock Holmes say when he saw a very pretty lady? Hello

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What do you call a shark on land A dead shark

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Q:How do you kill Chuck Norris ? A:You don't , He kills you first.

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Indians

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. Put down your barbie. Get in the car.

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Why do giraffes have long necks? So they can reach higher, un-eaten leaves.

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Why was the math text book so worried....… Because he had to many problems

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How do you beat Princess Diana in a car race? Challenge Princess Diana to a car race.

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Why did the duck cross road? It didn't, it got ran over.

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Why is little johnny sad? He won the lottery but then found out the next day he had cancer and cried in a corner.

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why was the jew shaking hands with a nazi? they realized their differences and were bonding.

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To mama's so fat when she went to Dairy Queen she Ordered a blizzard.

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How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop? -250.

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What do you call a bear. Rob.

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What do a porkchop and a watermelon have in common? They're both edible, organic, and delicious. Also, both are fun to throw at people.

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A Buddhist priest, and mexican drug lord, and a 12 year old girl walk into a bar. The bartender looks at the little girl and says. "Honey, you're too young to be in here." the little girl looks around and says. "Oh, My mistake." and leaves.

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My mom

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A man walks into a chiropractor. The chiropractor asked whats wrong with you? The man replies My boner has scoliosis.

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a termite walks into a bar and asks, "wheres the bar tender?"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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