A black man walks into a store with a gun. It is a gun store and he needs to buy amunition after using all of his to fend of a home invader, and protect his family. He lives in a bad area because he never went to college and cannot get a well paying job in this economy, so he can't afford to buy a house in a better area He then used the gun to rob a bank. He no longer lives in a poor area

thumb_up thumb_down -50

A rabbi, a nun, and a homosexual walk into a bar. They proceed to get drunk, and party like its 1972. Oh yeah. And your dad was just killed by a refrigerator.

thumb_up thumb_down -60

What is a waste of time and money? Your mother.

thumb_up thumb_down +45

Psychic wanted. You know where to apply.

thumb_up thumb_down +43

whats more embarissing rhan being raped by a squirel? Being a 40 year old virgin working at mcdonalds

thumb_up thumb_down +41

Yo mommas teeth are so yellow that.....I reccomend she see a dentist.

thumb_up thumb_down +39

Why wasn't the tractor moving? Because the farmer was killed in a drive-by shooting.

thumb_up thumb_down +39

A man walks into a park. He gets abducted and raped by flying asparagus.

thumb_up thumb_down +37

Why was the girl-scout crying? I hit her in the knee with a baseball bat.

thumb_up thumb_down +37

What did David's mom give him for his birthday? Nothing he hasn't seen her in eight years.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

What did one alien say to another alien? I miss Mexico.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

How do you put an elephant in a taxi? You open the door, make sure the elephant is seated confortably, and close the door.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

What do George Washington, JFK and Hillary Clinton have in common? They've never been to my house.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

why did the kid struggle in school? because hes mentally retarted

thumb_up thumb_down +33

Why did Rihanna sing "to the left, to the left"? Because people usually sing in songs

thumb_up thumb_down +31

Have you ever had a traditional Ethiopian Dinner? Neither have they.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

Why did the boy fall off the swing? He had no arms Why couldnt he get up? He had no legs What did the boy get for Christmas? Cancer What did the boy get for Easter? A funeral Knock, knock Who's there? Not the boy.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

Why is travis so funny? Trick question, He died of cancer 3 years ago.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

When life gives you lemons You've got some lemons.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

Whats the hardest part of a vegetable to eat?? The WheelChair

thumb_up thumb_down +29

How many Jews can fit in a Volkswagen beetle? Four, although five is possible if you are not afraid of getting a ticket.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

So, this cheerio is in love with a beautiful frosted cheerio. He asks her on a date. She says no, because she only dates other frosted cheerios. So the cheerio works really hard at his job and is promoted to a honey-nut cheerio. So he asks her out again. She says no because she only dates frosted cheerios. So he works even harder and is made a frosted cheerio. He asks her out again and she accepts. 4 months later after a relationship built on trust and understanding they are married and live a long and fullfilling life together.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

You know what rhymes with sloth? Rape.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

What did the prostitute say to the president of the United States? Good morning Mr. President. She had managed to leave the sex industry, finished her education and was doing secretarial work in the White House.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops