Did you hear about the man who played the lottery? He lost.

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AAAnd that did not totally send a rush of sweet endorphin's up my spine, I think myself of as really really blunt, I value individualism rather than complete assimilation, I think that, if people want to hear my opinion, they ask me, and if they want to hear what they want to hear, they can ask... Pff, anybody else. I end up insulting a lot of people literally asking for it, but moments like these make it all worth it. I am also extremely superstitious, the catchphra states "Grain of salt" so I wont take your comment completely... I am just screwing around...

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Why did Jill fall off the swings? -Because she had no arms. Knock Knock? --Who's there? Not Jill. What did Jill get for Christmas? -What? I don't know. She couldn't open it.

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Q: How many teenagers does it take to change a lightbulb? A: None, they just sit in the dark and complain about it.

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What did the Amazonian tribesman say to the European explorer? Nothing, he was focussing on eating him.

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What is orange and smells like oranges? Oranges.

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A guy walks into a bar. He meets a girl and they have a great time. He calls her the next day and their relationship continues for many months. Eventually they get married and have children.

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Knock Knock! Who's There? Billy Sup Billy, come on in!

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Knock, Knock. Who's there? Dave. Dave who? Dave proceeds to break into tears as his grandmother's Alzheimers has progressed to the point where she can no longer remember him.

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How did the girl cross the road? -She didn't, she died because she was blind and didn't see the "don't walk" sign.

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Where did Susie go during the bombing? Everywhere

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How do you make an emo kid cry? He already is.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't. He got hit by a semi.

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What did the leperchaun get at the bake sale? baked goods.

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Q. What did the girl on drugs get for Easter? A. Down Syndromes Disease.

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why did the girl stop laughing? there was nothing to laugh about.

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What's worse than an earthquake? Two earthquakes. What's worse than two earthquakes? Three earthquakes. What's worse than three earthquakes? The world exploding.

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Whats worse than the Holocaust? A second one

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What's Brown and Sticky? A Stick

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knock knock Dave's not here.

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drugs.

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whats yellow and very big? I dont know. no one will tell me

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Bill: Hey Bob guess what? Bob:What? Bill: your adopted

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A: Why did the chicken cross the road? B: Why? A: If I knew I wouldn't be asking you.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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