Why did the man cross the road? Because the light was red!

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what do you call a black man in the bank holding a bag of money. One wealthy man

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Why did the family sue disney? Because at a meet and greet location mickey mouse shot their youngest in the heart.

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roses are red violets are blue i have Alzheimer whats a rose?

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What's worse than a bee sting? A large number of things ranging from getting stung by two bees to falling off a cliff.

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What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in a pool? Phil, because that's his name.

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Two black guys were walking down a street to meet up a local drug dealer. Turns out the black guys were undercover cops who arrested the drug dealer and both recieved awards for finding the criminal.

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A blonde, a brunette, and a red head walk into a bar. You think they should have ducked?

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How did the blonde trip the brunette? She stuck out her foot

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A jew walked out of a bar then goes to the other bar across the street then walks out from the back door to go to another bar The Actions of this jew tells us that there are only 3 bars in the zone and one pet shop

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A 21 year old man walks into a bar. After looking at the menu for a minute he orders the cocktail of the day. The bartender looks at the man in disbelief because he has such a baby face and looks like a teenage kid. The bartender politely asks to see his ID. The man pulls out his wallet and shows him his drivers license. Sure enough he was the legal age of drinking. The bartender says "Thank you" and gives him his beverage.

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roses are red, violets are blue, {insert name here} is f**ked up, (s)he want to have sex with you

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What's black, white, and red all over? An interracial man with multiple stab wounds.

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Four blonds are driving to Disneyworld. They finally get to Florida and they see a sign that says "Disneyworld: left" so they take the left and get hit by a semi and all die.

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whats better than a girl getting hit by a car? a girl getting hit by a car with my dick in her

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But that just reinforces the negative stereotype that women don't have penises.

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What did the star say to the asteroid? Nothing, astral bodies can't talk, you dipshit.

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Q: What do you call an underground train full of professors? A: It's very unlikely that the passengers on an underground train would consist entirely of professors, unless it was a special service booked solely for the attendees of highly specialised lectures which required each audience member to have completed a professorship.

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Why did Tim fall out of the window? Well... he didn't exactly fall... I pushed him

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Why did the man go to McDonalds? Because he was a pedophile.

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Q. What's yellow and looks like a duck? A. a baby duck

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Ok so im on antijoke.com and they tell me i can write my own joke... so i did.

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Do you know what my Granddad said to me before he kicked the bucket? He said; how far do you think I could kick this bucket? Then he died.

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What's green fury has 4 legs, and if it fell out of a tree it would kill you. A pool-table

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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