Why did Suzie fall off the swing? She had no arms. Although I guess there is probably no way to get on the swing with no arms unless there was another person there to aid you in the process, and that is highly unlikely because nobody wants to hang out with a girl with no arms. Still even if Suzie was helped on to the swing she wouldn't be able to swing because of her lack of arms. Maybe that person who helped her on pushed the swing with her on it bearing in mind she has no arms. In that case Suzie should stop hanging out with that person because they are very sadistic to deliberately shove a girl with no arms off a swing.

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I like my coffee like I like my slaves... Free

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Whats worse than 10 babies nailed to one tree 1 baby nailed to 10

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What's the difference between a lawyer and a catfish? One is a bottom-feeding scum sucker, and the other is an advisor who assists people by representing them on legal matters.

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whats worse then a truck full of babies? if it went off a cliff into a canyon full of knives.

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What's black, white, and red all over? And interracial man with multiple stab wounds.

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Did you go swimming in the Carribean Ocean? Yes, a shark ate my body, and killed me! Thank God I'm still alive!

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Jewish guy walks into a bar. He owns the place.

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What's worse than a fake bomb? Do I really have to answer that?

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Why did the Mexican mow the lawn? The grass was getting to high and needed to be trimmed.

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What did the apple say to the carrot? Nothing, apples don't talk

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roses are red violets are blue grass is green

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A dyslexic man walks into a bar. His own feelings of inadequacy over his learning disability have driven him to drink and is driving a wedge between him and his family

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What do you call a dear with no eyes? A no-idear

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Why does Larry the Cable Guy get his own T.V. show??? Why can't I have one of my own??? .......ah...forgot....I'm a minority...

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What's the difference between an orange? Two typewriters, because vests don't have sleeves.

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Every circle of friends has a "crazy one". If you can't figure out who the "crazy one" in your group is... Try harder. Either that or you are a terrible judge of character.

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What do you get when you mix a teenager with a tanning bed? Cancer

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You: "Ask me if im an astronaut. " Them: "R u an astronaut?" You: "No. "

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Doesn't matter, had sex. Except for the STD's I possibly contracted.

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Did you know Helen Keller had a doll house? She didn't either.

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-The proceeding statement is true. -The preceeding statement is false.

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Steven Hawking walks into a bar. Steven Hawking is disabled from the neck down. I lied.

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What's worse than the holocaust? Finding half a worm in your apple.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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