Guess what I was with your mom last night so I wraped her in foil and put her in the oven.

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A black man and a Mexican are in a car. Who's driving? The cop. The two men were best friends who had taken off from their law firm. Alex had recently gone through a divorce and John decided to take him on a trip backpacking across Europe. One rainy night an off-duty police officer picked them up and took them out for drinks. The friends had a wonderful trip. But Alex never got over Jenny leaving him. 3 months later John found him dead in his home by auto-erotic asphyxiation.

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Two elderly men were sat next to a children's playground... They were there to pick up their grandchildren because their parents were at work.

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Girl, why are you crying? I'm not a girl, I'm a strawberry.

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What's the best way to cross the road? Ideally with your feet and legs, consdiering as disabled people usually don't recommend their unfortunate state of affairs. However there are other alternatives which may or may not be better than common or garden walking, such as crane hire - crossing in a crane bucket in a safe spot; chauffer driven limos, which don't do the straight, direct route, generally; and being carried on a replica of Cleopatra's carry couch (but with modern suspension, unless you prefer the up and down motion)

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What did the homeless man get for his birthday? AIDS

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What happened when a star exploded? It killed billions of other sentient beings.

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whats the difference between a phone and Helen Keller? you listen to the phone and you smash Helen Keller on the head with a spiked baseball bat

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Q: why is there always a window in front of the kitchen sink A: so when the woman is washing the dishes she can see the grass she is about to cut

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24

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What's black and white and red all over? Obama covered in red paint.

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My dog has no nose, how does it smell? Using its anus.

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So a clown walks up to you and asks, "What'll always STICK with you? The violent disposition of humanity."

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That awkward moment when your brother goes to crack his neck, but he dies instead.

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Q: What's the difference between a Boyscout and a Jew? A: Boyscouts come home from camp.

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You know you're a redneck when you come from a rural area and behave as such.

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What is the same about a Duck and a Pickle? Neither of them can ride a bike.

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Why was the boy in front of the adoption center sad? He lost his lolly-pop.

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there are two wales chilling at a bar one looks at the other and does a wale call for 2 minutes and the other looks back and say "dude your drunk we gotta go!"

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Are we in Tennessee? Because I recently saw on the side of the road that it was 10 miles to Memphis.

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Q: What's green and has four wheels? A: A green car.

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If I could Rearrange the alphabet, i would put U and Q together.

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I wonder what happen to John? Oh John I know what happen to him. What happened to him then? He was playing on the bridge and fell off on accident. Is he okay? Damn women of coarse he is not okay!!!

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What do you call a deer with no eye? NO IDEAR!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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