How do you make a blonde go 'ewwwww'? Hand her a moose placenta.

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a dog jumping up and catching a frisbi

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Why did the black man cross the road? he just wanted to cross the road, racist. ... after he had robbed a bank

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Why did the chicken cross the road Why? Because his house was burning down on the other side

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What will you never see? A white Guy that can jump.

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What's the difference between a Ferrari and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a Ferrari in my garage.

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What's the difference between a lawyer and a catfish? A catfish could never pass the LSAT because it is unable to perform high-level critical thinking.

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A man walks into a bar and takes a seat at the bar stool. He then proceeds to look over and said a man in a suit and tie open up the window , jumps, and begins to float in mid air. In amazement he approaches the man. He says " That's amazing! How do you do that?" The man in the suit and tie replies "Drink this liquid and you will be able to fly." The man with excitement quickly rushes to the window, opens it, and suddenly falls to his death. The bartender says to the man with the suit and tie " Superman, you're a real dick when your drunk."

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Knock knock Who's there? It's me It's me who? It's me who is knocking the door

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Q: Why is there never sun beaming at the castle? A: Because the castle is full of knights.

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the awkward moment when you kill everyone in school and blame it on the fat kid

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With all due respect, I do underestimate myself, there is not a single person I know that has not told me that, but if I wanted to, I would not even had to make the effort to have you removed, hell I had to pull favors and owe people things in order to keep you safe. I could have said the rest of you, but had I not known you, had you not been one of my co-workers back then, I would not have gone to the extremes that i did, you are beautiful, but what does that have to do with anything? Do you think that if I did not know you I would go "that one is sexy, release her?" Even if I did, I do not have authority, I work for them.

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Do you play piano? No

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Why did the mokey board the westbound train? I said gray umbrella noodle head!

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Where does Mario go after you finish the game? Drug rehab.

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What grows best during the cold Winter season? The number of deaths among homeless people.

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What did the doctor say to his patient? You have AIDS.

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Why wasn't the tractor moving? Because the farmer was killed in a drive-by shooting.

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What's just not right? Left

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What do you call a Mexican that sails a ship? A sailor

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What's worse than a bug in your soup? Getting shot in the stomach.

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why did the kid struggle in school? because hes mentally retarted

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Why can't Hellen Keller drive? Because she's a woman

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Why does Snoop Dogg have an umberella? For shielding himself from the rain.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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