There is a blond and a burnette in a car. The blonde is driving. What a nice use of the carpool

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What did the Irish nun say on her deathbed? "I now realize that smoking was an unhealthy habit and I regret that I made the choice to do so." Then she died

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A man invites his Irish friend to his house. "Would you like something to drink?" the man asks. "Just kidding, we don't have any drinks." Later, they die of dehydration.

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What's the difference between and orange? The horse wasn't wearing a saddle.

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do you know what Noah didn't bring on his arc? unicorns

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What's funnier than a pile of dead babies? A pile of dead babies with a live one crawling out.

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How do you make a little girl cry twice? Rub your bloody dick on her teddy bear

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Who lives in a pineapple under the sea?! No one... pineapples float.

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What sound does a dead cat make? Nothing, it's dead.

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why did the hobo want cancer so badly? he really needed a haircut

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There are only three kind of people: people who can count and people that can't count

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Why did the black man fall down the stairs? Because he was blind

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Who is that? That is my daughter, She likes climbing trees.

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One day, while a blonde was out driving her car, she ran into a truck. The truck's driver made her pull over into a parking lot and get out of the car. He took a piece of chalk and drew a circle on the pavement. He told her to stand in the middle and not leave the circle. Furious, he went over to her car and slashed the tires. The blonde got angry and called the cops, who proceeded to come and arrest him.

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2 muffins were in the oven when one turned to the other and said. "Damn it's hot in here" The second muffin looked at him with a shocked expression and exclaims "She's burning the potatoes!"

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You know why they call me Scuba Steve? Because I Scuba Dive.

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A. Big feet, you know what that means B. He has to order his shoes on line because they don't carry his size in stores.

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Have you seen stevie wonders new piano? No Well it's really nice

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why did the baby fall down the stairs? i pushed it.

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whats the best part about ebola? nothing ebola is a dangerous virus

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roses are red, violets are blue, {insert name here} is f**ked up, (s)he want to have sex with you

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What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in a pool? Phil, because that's his name.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Grass is green Skies are blue

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What do you get when you stab a baby? A dead baby.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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