- Anti Joke

Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

WHAT? FRIENDS? DID YOU NOT READ MY QUICKFUCK PROFILE? Likes: Orgies. Favorite color: Pussy. Description:Looking for women with vaginas (maybe an asshole is fine too) Please, I am a womanizer, of course we are friends, heck I am even romantic, you know romantic as in... Uh... Well, maybe not my rose bud... (because that did really not appear at the solve media right now)

What do you get when you mix a turtle and a dog An animal

Why do Squirrels accidentally plant millions of trees. Because they bury their nuts and forget where they are.

Roses are red Violets are blue Chrome won't stop crashing randomly F*ck Chrome

How do you make a lumberjack cry? Kill his family

Q: Whats worse then a minor fender bender? A: Dieing a long painful death by getting stabbed 27 times then getting hit by a car 2 hours later your brother finds you and told you that him and your wife have been cheating on you and your kid is his.

If I could rearrange the letters of the alphabet.... dklaujeo bnvalue doiandkluq!!

Why does the Green Giant's vegetables taste funny? He stands over his peas and corn.

Variants: :) I will always assist you in whatever you want. :( I want to kill you all by myself! Sense? Non? Fuck? Mind? Fission Mailed? Impossible Mission.

If you eat a brussel sprouts-and-ketchup sundae, your tastebuds will likely turn purple and move to France, where people don't eat brussel sprouts-and-ketchup sundaes.

Why did the chicken cross the road? He was jewish and saw a nickel on the other side

Why did the black man take the watermelon? Because he bought it, and watermelons are delicious.

a black guy a white guy and a spanish guy walk into a bar, after they left the bar they became good friends despite thier differences.

knock knock whos there the game i lost the game

What do you call a fat computer? Adele :)

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

Want more? You might be interested in...

Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops

Why did the old man lose his cane? He didnt. He had alzheimers

What about the cool kids down the block. Their friend just died with a serious health condition.

Why did the tomato fall off the swing? Because tomatoes don't have arms.

Camon is to Jerry Sandusky as Cole Ryder is to Will Higgins!

Why did the black guy lose the race? He toke an arrow to the knee

How Many Chickens does it take to make an egg? NOrmally 2

yo mama so dumb... because she was not properly educated

What time is it? 2:47 PM.

Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

What do you get when you mix a turtle and a dog An animal

Why do Squirrels accidentally plant millions of trees. Because they bury their nuts and forget where they are.

Roses are red Violets are blue Chrome won't stop crashing randomly F*ck Chrome

How do you make a lumberjack cry? Kill his family

Q: Whats worse then a minor fender bender? A: Dieing a long painful death by getting stabbed 27 times then getting hit by a car 2 hours later your brother finds you and told you that him and your wife have been cheating on you and your kid is his.

If I could rearrange the letters of the alphabet.... dklaujeo bnvalue doiandkluq!!

Why does the Green Giant's vegetables taste funny? He stands over his peas and corn.

Variants: :) I will always assist you in whatever you want. :( I want to kill you all by myself! Sense? Non? Fuck? Mind? Fission Mailed? Impossible Mission.

If you eat a brussel sprouts-and-ketchup sundae, your tastebuds will likely turn purple and move to France, where people don't eat brussel sprouts-and-ketchup sundaes.

Why did the chicken cross the road? He was jewish and saw a nickel on the other side

Why did the black man take the watermelon? Because he bought it, and watermelons are delicious.

a black guy a white guy and a spanish guy walk into a bar, after they left the bar they became good friends despite thier differences.

knock knock whos there the game i lost the game

What do you call a fat computer? Adele :)

Anti Joke

Our Updated iOS App!

The Anti Joke Book

MOAR??

Why did the old man lose his cane? He didnt. He had alzheimers

What about the cool kids down the block. Their friend just died with a serious health condition.

Why did the tomato fall off the swing? Because tomatoes don't have arms.

Camon is to Jerry Sandusky as Cole Ryder is to Will Higgins!

Why did the black guy lose the race? He toke an arrow to the knee

How Many Chickens does it take to make an egg? NOrmally 2

yo mama so dumb... because she was not properly educated

What time is it? 2:47 PM.

Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

What do you get when you mix a turtle and a dog An animal

Why do Squirrels accidentally plant millions of trees. Because they bury their nuts and forget where they are.

Roses are red Violets are blue Chrome won't stop crashing randomly F*ck Chrome

How do you make a lumberjack cry? Kill his family

Q: Whats worse then a minor fender bender? A: Dieing a long painful death by getting stabbed 27 times then getting hit by a car 2 hours later your brother finds you and told you that him and your wife have been cheating on you and your kid is his.

If I could rearrange the letters of the alphabet.... dklaujeo bnvalue doiandkluq!!

Why does the Green Giant's vegetables taste funny? He stands over his peas and corn.

Variants: :) I will always assist you in whatever you want. :( I want to kill you all by myself! Sense? Non? Fuck? Mind? Fission Mailed? Impossible Mission.

If you eat a brussel sprouts-and-ketchup sundae, your tastebuds will likely turn purple and move to France, where people don't eat brussel sprouts-and-ketchup sundaes.

Why did the chicken cross the road? He was jewish and saw a nickel on the other side

Why did the black man take the watermelon? Because he bought it, and watermelons are delicious.

a black guy a white guy and a spanish guy walk into a bar, after they left the bar they became good friends despite thier differences.

knock knock whos there the game __i lost the game__

What do you call a fat computer? Adele :)

Anti Joke

Our Updated iOS App!

The Anti Joke Book

MOAR??

knock knock whos there the game i lost the game