Nero, I am happy to hear from you again, but it kinda sounds like you are going to get yourself killed or something. Is there something else I can do? If that asshole is suffering, kill him after he is done doing it, I am done with that piece of shit. Honestly, what is going on Nero? You are not going to suicide or something are you? Please respond, right away, or I wont call your wife.

Why did the girl fall off of the swing? Because she didn't have any arms.

*Knock Knock* Who's there? "Justin Bieber" And you let him in because he's a young talented singer.

You!!!!!! Cause your whole existence is just one big joke.

A light bulb is very similar in shape to a pear. So, when you change a light bulb, don't replace it by a pear.

roses are red violets are blue i killed your family

What did the day say to his son when he came out of the closet? Its alright

why is lady gaga so famous? because she has a penis.

Yo Mama so ugly I don't know how she found your dad.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It had a heart attack. Why did the baby fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the monkey

the only thing i learned in geometry is when you push two circles together it makes a titty venn diagram

How do you circumcise a cat? Shoot an orphan in the leg with a rail gun.

A blonde walks into an electronics store. She asks an assistant, "Can I buy that TV"? He says, "Sure, no problem." She then walks out of the store, happy with the purchase that she made.

Mom now that I am fourteen can I get a bra now? No Harold!

one day a boy asked a Manican if it had a pulse it didn't

Q: How do you measure a ruler A: You don't.

why is justin bieber so pale? Because he hasn't come out of the closet.

Why did the guy go to the strip club? To look at naked people.

What do you get when you reverse Zelda's Lullaby ? Skyward Sword's theme.

Why do thieves shower before undertaking a robbery? Probably part of their morning routine.

How do you offend a black man? Call him a nigger.

Q- if a small quiz is a quizicle then whats a small test A- a testicle

why did the black man fall down the stairs? he was blind, do to loss of vision from cancer

Anti-Joke is a knock-off.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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