What does an orange and a lemon have in common? They are both orange, exept lemon

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why the african children was sad? - Because an octopus bite his arm

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Two great white sharks are swimming in the ocean together, one turns to the other to speak, but doesn't because sharks can't talk.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

what do you call a dead man rolling down a hill on fire, being shot in the head, and strapped to a bomb Dead

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What happened when the boy stood up? He had all his limbs hacked off and soon after died.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Yo momma so fat she couldn't even fit in a house

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What did Timmy's mom think of his art project? Nothing, she screamed and called an ambulance because she saw that he had tripped and fallin onto a pair of scissors and they just so happened to peirce his heart.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Two Chav's jump off a cliff who wins? Neither, the affects of gravity are equal despite the weight of said object.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What goes down well with whiskey? Pedestrians

thumb_up thumb_down +6

a guy walks in to a bar in iraq. 10 people died because of it

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Q:Why did the black man fall down? A: he got hit in the face by a refrigerator

thumb_up thumb_down +6

So these two guys walk into a bar... Well, I forgot the rest of the joke, but your mother a whore.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why did Hellen Keller drive off of the cliff? Because she is a woman.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Q: Where does Cher sit? A: I have no idea.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Knock Knock Who's There Not you... What? *Pulls out finger gun* *Screams BOOM!*

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What do you call a Mexican flying a plane? A pilot

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why couldn't the little boy tie his shoes? He had no arms

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why can't Helen Keller drive? She's dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why did the chicken cross the road? To run away from ebola

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Hush, little baby, don't say a word, Mama's going to buy you a mockingbird. If that mockingbird won't sing, Mama's going to buy you a another mockingbird.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Q: What's small, round, and looks like a marble? A: A marble.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Hickory Dickory Dock Three mice ran up a clock The cluck struck one But the two other got away with minor injuries

thumb_up thumb_down +4

A man walks into a butchers and asks for a loaf of bread the butcher replies " no im a butcher" The man says " its ok my bikes outside"

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Two girls are in a car together. The one in the drivers seat is texting while driving. The girl in the passengers seat notices this and tells her the she should put it away in case of a risk of a collision. She apologizes and puts it away and the two of them drive to the store unharmed and continued their normal day.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops