A man brings his entire family in to meet a show producer. The producer says, "Okay, let's see what you got." The man then proceeds to lead his family through a variety of acts, including showcasing the proper way to drink English tea and how to dress for a polo match. When they finish, the producer asks, "And just what do you call your act?" To which the man replies, "The Aristocrats!"

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whats flat and useless? the walls of an abandoned house where land prices are increasing and properties are in high demand

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Well, you need to develop a particular mindset, and while scienTITS claim that its not logical so it does not work... Well, SUGAR, thing is that the mind and emotions, cannot be explained logically either. Let me expand your mind (if I have not already) A astronomer meets up with a brain surgeon, the Astronomer says to the brain surgeon: I do not believe in god. Why? says the brain surgeon. Because I have studied most of the outer space and never found seen any trace of God.

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A man walks into a pizza place and orders a pizza. When he got the pizza, he saw it had pepporonis on it. He liked that, so he ate the pizza.

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What did the dog say to the tree? Bark.

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Whats the difference between anne frank and osama bin laden? Nothing. They were both found eventually.

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Q:What's the greatest part about having sex with twenty five year old girls? A: There's 20 of them

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What do you call a bear. Rob.

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You know whats annoying? Steve

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And so he penguin said, The is my most casual outfit!" HAAAW

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Why did Helen Keller cross the road? Hoefuwpugosihfioapfsoihosw[

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Your mama so fat she often lays awake at night wondering if you father is happy with their sex life. He isn't.

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A man walks into a chiropractor. The chiropractor asked whats wrong with you? The man replies My boner has scoliosis.

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twenty three roaches walk into a bar. the bar is evacuated due to insects.

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Why do you have to write a conclusion at the end of your paper? So people dont have to read the whole thing.

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When Chuck Norris roundhouse kicked the world, He broke his foot because every human being that kicks such a solid structure would break their foot.

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Knock knock I don't even have a door just walk in

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What is Cleopatra's favorite cookie? A: Chips Ahoy

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How do you wake up lady gaga? First you simply whisper in her ear telling her to wake up. If she doesn't, simultaneously whisper and tap her gently. If you have failed to achieve your accomplished goal, repeat step two however intensely touch her and project your voice when telling her to wake up. Step three, get a... WAIT WAIT!! I just waisted 20 seconds of your life, you're never going to meet her.

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Why didn't Sally go to the party? Because everybody hates her and she wasn't invited.

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Why are many frogs green? Because yes they are.

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Oracle horacle, you big bloated boracle!

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What did the Mexican shoe salesman say to the man? Excuse me, do you whih way to main street?

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why was one black guy surrounded by ten white guys...... he was a story teller.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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