Why did a girl get an STD? She had sex.

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Two gay guys are cuddling in a park when they spot a hot, busty blonde jogging near them. One turns to the other and says, "Damn... It's days like this I wish I was a lesbian."

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Knock Knock. who's there? James. well use the doorbell.

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Yo mamma's so fat, she's self-concsious about her weight and is embarassed when people make fun of her weight which makes her escape to her only friend, food, which makes her even fatter, so she will never lose weight until society accepts her and is not so prejudice towards overweight people.

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What happens when two elephants go out in the rain? They get wet.

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your mamas so fat she tried to hang herself but the rope broke.

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Why did Michael Jackson get so many nose jobs? He was incredibly insecure.

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What did George Washington say to his men before crossing the Delaware River? "Men, we're crossing the Delaware River."

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. I have a gun! So I KILL YOU!!!!

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Q) How do you kill a blue elephant? A) Shoot it with a blue elephant gun. Q) How do you kill a pink elephant? A) Hold its trunk until it turns blue, then shoot it with a blue elephant gun. Q) How do you kill a white elephant? A) Tickle it until it turns pink, hold its trunk until it turns blue, then shoot it with a blue elephant gun.

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The next person to submit a 'roses are red' 'joke', is cursed to always prematurely ejaculate from here until eternity

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What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? nothing he was Jewish

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What do you call a bear in the rain? A wet bear.

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a man makes a bad joke

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What did the jewish man say to the Irish guy at the bar? Are you Irish?

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A priest, a pedophile and a rapist walk into a bar. He orders a drink.

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what's mouthwatering and smells like fish? salmon

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Three Jews are hiding under the floorboards. One of them makes a noise and a second Jew elbows him so he'll keep quiet. They are heard and are all caught. It's now their turn to seek because they are playing Hide n' Seek.

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Why did Jimy fell down the stairs, because he was adopted.

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What do you call a girl with an iq of 13 Dead

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Why did Suzy fall off the swing? Because she had no arms or legs. Knock Knock? Who's There? Not Suzy. What did Suzy want for Christmas? Parents who loved her. What did Suzy get for Christmas? Cancer.

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When you see birds flying in a V why is one side of the V always longer than the other? There are more birds on that side

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a dyslexic man walked his god.

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Don't you just hate it when a sentence doesn't end the way you octopus?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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