There once was a man from Nantucket, who had his car stolen and wasn't very happy so called the police.

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Why did the baby cross the road? It was stapled to the chicken.

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What noise does a Chinese roller coaster make? Chink Chink Chink Chink chink.....

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms. Why couldn't she get up? She had no legs. Why did noone help her up? She was fat.

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Why was the man struck by lightning? Josh Mathai was there.

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Why do Asians get 50% off on movies? They don't.

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When life gives you melons you may be dyslexic.

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What's easier than a whore? Doesn't matter, your mom's a whore either way.

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The funniest thing happened the other day, it was like one went like this, and the other went like that, and then everyone laughed... ...Oh, its one of those where you would have had to be there to see how funny it was.

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I have a very serious problem with my narcolepsy. I occasionalolahdf;honainbirgnipqgierngiaqbhgpqruiph

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Why was the Mexican sleeping? He wishes to decrease his risk of motor vehicle accidents.

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Your mum is such a slut, I'd reccomend she seeks psychiatric help, as her deviant promiscuity is clearly a phsical manifestation of some deep rooted psychological disfunction. We all wish her well.

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Help i have fallen and i cannont get up Life alert life alert To bad just sit there we dont care

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A duct walks into a bar. The writer meant to write duck and then proceed to make a clever joke but instead a typo was made and a very unlikely occurence was writtern about considering air passages are not capable of walking and would most likely already be in the ceiling of the bar as too bring fresh air into the bar is important.

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What starts with F and ends with U-C-K? Firetruck

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, when the bass droped, my balls did too.

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what's round, hairy, has eight legs- but isn't a spider? A spider.

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What's the difference between a black man and a bench? The bench isnt going anywhere.

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what is worse - this joke or the last one? what is worse still - sex what is worster - nothing that's not a real word what is wurst? a type of sausage

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What's facial hair? Hair that slowly progresses to grow out of certain areas on your face.

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What's blue, white and red all over? Not a duck.

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Why did whitney Houston become a drug addict? Because she made some very bad decisions in her life.

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If pro is the opposite of con, then what is the opposite of progress? Regression.

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Last Christmas, I gave you my heart, But the very next day, I died.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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