Comedian: Do you all wanna hear a joke? Audience: Yeah!!! Comedian: Okay! What did the bad comedian say to the audience? Audience: What?!! Comedian: Chicken butt. Thank you, you've been a great crowd. Good night!

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What does DNA stand for? National Dyslexic Assosiation.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What's the difference between Neal Armstrong and Michael Jackson? Neal Armstrong was the first man to WALK on the MOON, while Michael Jackson enjoyed touching young boys.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

WELCOME TO THE GARLIC BOYS SHOW! So kids, what are we gonna eat today? POTATOES! FUUUUUUU! Moral: You say tomata, I say WROOOOOOOONG, you say cheap I say your mother.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Yo mama so dumb she got hit by a bus and didn't know! The funeral was touching and sad. Everyone cried. 2 weeks later..........Johnson ended his own life.......

thumb_up thumb_down +1

A couple elopes in Vegas. The next morning while eating breakfast the woman tells her husband she thinks it was a mistake, using her alcoholism as an excuse for her inability to make practical decisions. The man proceeded to cry and called his attorney to arrangea proper divorce.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why did the toilet paper roll? Because it isn't rock!

thumb_up thumb_down +1

A man walks into a bar. and buys a drink.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Can you spot the polar bear Probably not because global warming killed it

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the Light turned green, indicating that it was a safe and appropriate time to cross

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What do you call an alligator wearing a vest? An extremely talented reptile.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Q: Why is grass green? A: I painted it.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What is the difference between Julis Ceaser, and the moon? The moon is covered in rocks and craters, and Julis Ceaser is DEAD

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why don't you make like a tree, and get out of here.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Duncan walks into a bar and is greeted by his friends Eric and Tom. Duncan tells them that his wife left and took the kids. Duncan then goes home and hangs himself.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What did the murderer do after killing the family? he went to jail.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What do black people do with M&Ms? They eat them.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why was little Timmy mauled by a bear? He poked it with a pointy stick.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

four blondes where on their way to disneyworld they see a sign that say disneyworld:left so they turn around wondering where disneyworld went

thumb_up thumb_down +1

If quizzes are quizical, what are tests? Testicals

thumb_up thumb_down +1

how do you make lady gaga cry you poke here face then rape here.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What do you call a black guy driving a bus? A bus driver

thumb_up thumb_down +1

- i send you a friend request on facebook - okay

thumb_up thumb_down +1

How did Harry potter open the door? He had the key

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops