Why did the turtle take so long on his run? Because he never went on a run he walked.

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Coming this fall, A hilarious movie for the whole family to enjoy, actor Rob Schneider play a very normal man would goes to work everyday to support his family who he loves more than anything in the world, critics are saying that this is the most vulgar slapstick comedy of the year as Rob Schneider teaches his two adopted kids the power of Jesus Christ. Coming this fall... The Nun's Birthday Rated R for excessive nudity of Rob Schneider and an asian hooker.

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How many Jews can fit in a Volkswagen beetle? Four, although five is possible if you are not afraid of getting a ticket.

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whats worse than 10 dead babies in a bucket 5 are alive and eating the others

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Why did the piano explode? Beacause someone planted an explosive inside of it.

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What did the one battery say to the other? Nothing. Batteries can't talk.

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Why is travis so funny? Trick question, He died of cancer 3 years ago.

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How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

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What is the similarity between Moses and Muhammad? They both have the same letter starting their names

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A man jumped off a 30 story building. What did he learn? Nothing. He died instatly when he hit the ground.

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Roses are black Violets are black I'm blind

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Why was the little boy sad? Because he had a frog stapled to his face.

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What's the difference between an iPhone and a Samsung Galaxy? Google it, there are many differences.

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Shltskc gw? G

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Why do black people like Black Friday? They can get fairly expensive appliances for a very reasonable price.

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"I see London; I see France..." "Wow. You must have exceptional eyesight."

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I'm rubber and you're glue, neither one of us say anything because inanimate objects can't talk.

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What's worse than finding 7 dead babies in a bin? Finding one is missing.

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"What time is it?" "Time to buy a watch." The homeless man inquiring about the time proceeded to cry.

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There is a blond and a burnette in a car. The blonde is driving. What a nice use of the carpool

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Why couldn't Jimmy breathe? He had a knife in his throat!

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A horse walks into a bar, and the bartender says "Why the long face?" And the horse says "I have cancer".

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You can pick your ur nose u can pick ur friends u just can't pick ur friends nose.

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Some people are like Slinkies: they don't work as well as they say they will and you'll get bored of them quickly.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops