A man walks into a bar. He realizes that he would need a designated driver if he would want to return home safely. So he then leaves.

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what is red, yellow, green, blue, purple, and violet? Blood i lied about the other colors...

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Maths.

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Allmighty Genie vs Common douche Genie: I the allmighty Genie am at your command, I can grant you any three WISHES Common douche: Okay! I want to sit on my own lap Genie: Uh...Well...You uh sure you want that? I Uh... Wait a moment please... Wimp wins Genieous victory.

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How can you make sure your friend wont die of cancer? Decapitate him

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A russian gives away vodka.

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Whats red and has wheels? An apple, I was just kidding about the wheels.

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when geese fly in a v formation, why is one side always longer then the other? Because you touch yourself at night...

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Jack wasn't nimble. Jack wasn't quick. Jack sat on the candle and burned his corduroys.

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Knock knock... Knock knock... Knock knock... Unfortunately, nobody was home to sign for Marks parcel.

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Why did the black man have a gun in his hand? He was crossing through a dangerous neighborhood and was offering protection to himself and his family.

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In a nerd wedding they don't say "i do" They say "i accept the terms and conditions"

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Ever heard of carpel tunnel? Well after that girl it was more like carpal toungal

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What do you get a Jewish boy for Christmas? Nothing he died in 1943!

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whats the difference between a jew and a boy scout? - The boy scout comes home from camp.

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A kid walks into a bar. He leaves wasted.

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What do a Nazi and a Democrat have in common? They are both members of a highly supported political faction.

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whats gay and american? a gay american

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A child finally stood up to the school bullies! Recently the news did a story about a school shooting.

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How did Sarah Offet win? He had no arms. Knock, knock? Whose there? Not Sarah Offet

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Why did the boy drop his ice cream? Because he had heard this joke so many times that it drove him so mad that he grabbed an ice cream, stepped into the road, and was hit by a bus, purposely adding an ironic effect to his death.

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms

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an emo girl walked into a white room

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Sometimes you have to stop and smell the roses. Unless they are next to the trashcan where you put your little sisters diapers

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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