Q: How many blondes does it take to screw in a light bulb? A: One.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Colloqiual irregularities are a significant part of the English language, and excellent example of this is between can and may.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

roses are black violets are black i am blind

thumb_up thumb_down +18

What kind of mother doesn't do laundry? A dead one.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Why did the boy drop his ice cream? He did not have sufficient stability in his arm at that moment causing him to loosen his grip and drop his ice cream.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Knock knock. USE THE DOORBELL!

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Why did Carl the cat die? he didnt. he's still alive.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Where did Susie go during the bombing? Everywhere

thumb_up thumb_down +18

What do you call an unconscious black man? An ambulance.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Q: How many teenagers does it take to change a lightbulb? A: None, they just sit in the dark and complain about it.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

A watermelon, a cherry, a mango, and a peanut are sitting at the table for dinner. They are all eating chicken wings and watching the superbowl between the Packers and the Patriots. What is wrong with the situation? Well two things are wrong, cherry's cannot communicate with peanuts because they speak different languages(obviously). And the patriots fucking suck.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

"Knock knock," said the guy about to deliver a knock knock joke.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

A nun, a jew, and a black walk into a bar. The bartender says "What is this, a joke?"

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Can a match box? No, but a tin can.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

If life gives you lemons, you're setting up a bad joke

thumb_up thumb_down +18

What's worse then the bomb that went off in boston? The second one right after.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

A brunette, redhead, and a blond were on a road trip when their car broke down in the middle of a desert. The red-head offered to walk down the road to get help, for none of them knew how to repair the car. She walked down the road in the direction they were headed, but never came back. The redhead and blond died several days later in the shade of the car as a result of extensive heat exhaustion.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Two men walk into a bar. The first man says to the bartender "I'd like some h2o". The second man says "I'd like some h2o to". The second man died.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Q: What is green, jumps and says i'm a frog? A: A frog that talks

thumb_up thumb_down +18

How do you make a baby cry? You throw bricks at its face.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Q: whats the difference between a shoe and a ginger? A: shoes have soles.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

There are 2 black guys in a car. Who's driving? The police.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

What is big, red and eats rocks? A big red rock eater

thumb_up thumb_down +18

knock knock Dave's not here.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops