Yo mama's so fat, she died of a mixture of obesity and type 1 diabetes.

whats the difference between a thousand dead babies and a porshe? i dont have a porshe in my garage

How do you fit 100 dead babies in a box? A blender. How do you get them out? Tortilla Chips. hehehehehehe

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't it got run over on the way there.

What was Hellen Keller's favorite color? Velcro.

Jesus can can WALK on WATER, but Chuck Norris can SWIM in it.

I will see it when I believe it, as far as your order or whatever goes, I have already taken a look, and its nothing for me, you hide behind idealism yet use cruel methods and inhuman tactics in order to justify your means, you hide behind a shell of fucking "charm" and employ people to harass others. YOU ARE NO FUCKING BETTER THAN THE REST! YOU ARE BENEATH ME! As for that sister fucking bullshit, joke is on you, I do not have a sister! I bet that was one of your fucking "Nero`s" all six billion of your fucking personality disorders. Moral: I am the FUCKING MORAL MAN! And while I do not have a sister to rape, ill get down with yours.

Why couldn't the man ever reach his dream of becoming a professional athlete? He was pronounced with Alzheimer at a young age and could never remember his dream the next day.

Why was the mushroom invited to the party? Because the party was a rave and some mushrooms are know to make the consumer of them hallucinate wildly.

What do you call a man with a gun in his mouth? Keith.

Q: Why were there four married men in one room without their pants on? A: because it was the mens bathroom.

Which came first? The chicken? Or the egg? Whichever one was more sexually excited i guess.

Roses are red, My name is Dave, This joke is pointless, microwave.

What's the best part about having sex with twenty eight year olds? They've reached sexual peak but aren't yet past it. Plus, they still aren't in their 30's.

A monk went to a bar. He soon came out because he realized he didn't have cash because he left his wallet in his other robe.

Why can't Dave drive? Because Dave is an orange.

That`s my friends phone, I can call you from mine too if you want, please just don't hurt me, let me speak to you, I promise I will explain everything.

What was the black woman doing in the kitchen? She was simply washing her hands after eating dinner.

Whats worse than getting a splinter? Taking a shower at penn state

What are crabs with out the crabs Nothing hahahahaha

A man carrying a bucket of golf clubs walks into a bar with a blonde, a brunette, and an asian. His name was Tiger Woods.

If 2 wrongs make a right and 2 rights make a wrong, then when you have 4 rights=2 wrongs, you have a true statement. If you have 8 rights = 4 wrongs, you have a verified statement.

What did the ginger say to god? Nothing it has no soul

Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, Or so the tell me, Because I'm Blind

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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