Q) What is black, white, and red all over? A) A zebra that just became the kill of a hungry carnivore

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Roses are red violets are blue next thing you know my D*** is in you

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what did the boy with no arms and legs get for christmas? cancer

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Roses are red Violets are blue We decapitated some little children Now I'm in jail too.

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what is funnier than one dead baby in a dumpster? There is nothing funny about the homicide of a minor, and the murder should be immediately investigated.

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Why did the boy have pink skin at night? Because he did not put on a sufficient amount of sunscreen that morning. This is also known as sunburn.

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What is worse then your car getting hijacked? A 900 pound man eating a Donut.

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Roses are red, Violets are red, I have a dead body, What do I do.

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What did the little boy with a terminal illness get for Christmas? A gun

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if you press the thumbs up button nyan cat is going to visit you tonight

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A dyslexic man walks into a bra. He is promptly arrested for sexual harassment.

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Teacher- Pick the odd one out- Man, whale, bat, squirrel, frog Student- Whale. All others are found in Nebraska

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What is long, hard, and full of seamen? a school bus, if you consider children to be seamen

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the street? A: Because that was the direction it was headed.

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There were 3 children: Flower, Petal and Fridge. Flower asked, "Mum, why is my name Flower?" to which she replied "Because a flower was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Petal asked, "Mum, why is my name Petal?" to which she replied "Because a petal was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Fridge said, "Herp derp dur" to which Fridge's mother replied "Shut up, Fridge."

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What did the cat say to the dog? Meow.

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If you call a quiz a quizzicle, what do you call a test? A set of questions or problems used as a means of evaluating the abilities, aptitudes, skills, or performance of an individual or group.

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There was once a little boy who started feeling sick. His mother gave him some soup. He died anyway.

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Boy: Why is the sky blue? Man: Because it is

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what did the teacher say to the students when she was talking about the solar system The sun is very hot. At the core it is 15 million degrees Celsius or 27 million degrees Farenheit. Using a magnifying glass, we can see the very hot heat and the light of the sun. Please do not do that because it can hurt your eyes. This makes the light very bright and the heat is so hot it could start a fire.

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Why did the hamster cross the road? Because he was stapled to the chicken.

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How do you piss off a redneck? You wait until he is done fucking his sister and then you steal his truck.

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What did the elephant say to the pelican? He didn't say anything. I lied.

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What's the difference between Neil Armstrong and Michael Jackson? Neil Armstrong WALKS on the moon. Michael Jackson rapes little boys

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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