why did the woman walk into the kitchen? i don't know, but the better question is why she left in the first place.

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What is the worst gift a child can get? a gift

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Your mother is so morbidly obese that she greatly exceeds the necessary recommended serving sizes of each meal.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because grass don't eat meat.

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A man with two broken legs walks into a bar.

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Q. What's yellow and sour? A. Not a banana

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Why didn't Pat's grandma go to his birthday party? Because she died last night

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I stepped into the bathroom and began to take a shower. Then, I panicked. I was so thirsty, and I did not take the advantage to drink some water before I stepped into the bathroom. But then I realized: "Wow, I am so silly. I am standing under the shower, so I could easily just expedite my washing and drying, exit the bathroom, get dressed, and grab something to drink from the kitchen!" Then I showered quickly and got something to drink.

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whats worse than catching your parents having sex? having sex with your parents

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what did the blind, deaf, paraplegic child get for christmas? other than cancer, nothing.

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What happened when the Asian girl got a B on her report card? She committed suicide

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Whats the difference between a truck full of bowling balls and a truck full of dead babies? You can't unload one with a pitchfork

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A man walks into a bar with a frown on his face His dog just died

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Why can't Elvis Presley drive a car backwards? Because he's dead!

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Q: whats funnier than watching a black man and a midget fight? A: anything technically, your opinion

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What did the pilot say to the female flight attendant? He told her to never tell his wife about the time they spent in mexico or he'd bludgeon her to death with a hammer.

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hey girl, My Gyarados is BIG enough for you to ride it ALL day and night

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Why has 8 wheels and costs more than a Lamborghini? Two Lamborghinis.

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why did marybeth fall off the swing i shot her in the fart box and she died

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What did the tiger say to the jellyfish? Nothing; tigers can't talk. And if they could the chances of a tiger meeting a jellyfish would be very slim.

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How did the Mexican cross the border? He couldn't he didn't have legs

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Dear Six, Please stop spreading rumors about me and nine. I hear you two also do some pretty nasty things. Love, Seven.

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Why was OJ Simpson's knife covered in blood? Because he just murdered his wife.

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What do you call a girl with no arms and legs? Whatever her name is.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops