what do u call a black guy who sells drugs a pharmacist

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what did the duck say to the monkey.............. QUACK!!!!!!!!

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What happens if you don't stop, drop, and roll? Astigmatism.

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What did the mexican say when two houses fell on him? Nothing. He was dead.

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Watch me whip, watch me nae nae

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Q:What did the homeless guy say to the business man on the cell phone A: Nothing because he doesn't want to disturb his phone call

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How does Lady Gaga like her meat? As a dress.

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What's yellow and can't swim? A bulldozer.

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Something strange in you're neighborhood. Who you gonna call? The police.

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"Knock knock" "Who's there?" "Fairy floss" "Fairy floss who?" "I'm sugar coating your Cancer diagnoses"

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Two friends are sitting on a couch watching TV. One friend accidently turned on a pornography channel. The other friend felt awkward and went home.

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what happened to the girl next door ? she was brutally murdered.

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There once was a mam from Peru He dreamed he was eating a shoe It wasn't... It was a goat

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What did Kane Larkin get on his birthday? Cancer...

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Timmy's mom is an alcoholic. His dog is asleep in the backyard. Timmy asks his mother, "Why is our dog sleeping?" His mother replies, "It's not sleeping, its dead."

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How many straight naked men can you fit in a wardrobe? I'm not sure but the situation is highly unlikely!

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What's worse than 50 dead babies stapled to trees? 47 dead babies stapled to trees (it's better if it's a nice, round number.)

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S + B + B = SB fuckin' B

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Why couldn't the man sleep? Because he was a wax model in a museum, and as we all know wax models are inanimate objects thus incapable of consciousness and therefore incapable of unconsciousness as well. Many other inanimate objects are caught up in similar problems relating to their incapability to do anything.

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Knock Knock Who's There Carly Carly Who Hey I just met you, and this is crazy So here's my number and call me maybe

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"Hey ask me if i'm fat" "Are you fat" "Leave me alone"

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Jake: Why did Sarah fall off the swing? Steve: She had no Arms. Jake: Knock Knock Steve: Who is there? Jake: Not Sarah

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Detroit has a low crime rate

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whats brown and rhymes with snoop? Dr. Dre

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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