What do you call a group of Mexicans jumping over a fence? I heat of runners trying out for the Mexican Olympic hurdle team.

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What"s pink and fluffy? Pink fluff.

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Chuck Norris was so famous we was casted for the show Walker, Texas Ranger

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What do you call a griraffe and a duck who's favorite colors are both purple? A coincidence in which two unrelated species have the same preference in colorant hues.

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Variants: :) I will always assist you in whatever you want. :( I want to kill you all by myself! Sense? Non? Fuck? Mind? Fission Mailed? Impossible Mission.

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I met her back in the 80s when she was a man.

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A brunette, a redhead and a blonde are on the run from the police. They see a barn, and decide to hide inside it. They find three burlap sacks, and each hide in one. The police enter the barn, arrest each of the girls, and sentence them to life imprisonment for murder.

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why does her hair shine so nicely? she uses good shampoo.

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What's orange and sounds like a parrot? An orange parrot

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Knock Knock. Who's there? It's the nazis we have reason to suspect that you are harboring illegal jewish fugitives and would like to check your house if it isn't too much trouble on your part.

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Q: What is red and smells like blue paint? A: Green paint.

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So mind telling me why you wont call me? And why, you know... Are you avoiding this condition of yours?

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YOU MEAN SHE ACTUALLY EVER LIKED ME? WOOOOAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH! Anyway, tell her to contact me here, during the number of letters up there divided by a certain number you got over there, minus the letters here subtracted with the VEEEEEEERY same ammoooouuuuunt... Moral: God I need to invent a code system that makes me sound less like Jim Carrey on crack...

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Do you know what the forest fire got for Christmas? Your house

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Roses are red Violets are blue If you are reading this Then it must be deja vu

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Why can't Michael Jackson work at a boy scouts camp? Because he's dead.

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What do you call a white guy with 5 black guys. The owner of a basketball team

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What do you tell your chicken when it is it's birthday. Nothing, because he wouldn't understand you.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple Getting raped by a hose

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What do you feel inside after eating an entire class of pre-schoolers? A stomach ache

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A guy walks into a bar and falls.

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Two pen state administrators walk into a butt

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Whats brown and a fag? A bundle of sticks

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roses are blue violets are red crap i screwed up dont judge me

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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