An Irishman and his sheep are locked in a barn together for 3 days. On the 3rd day his wife finally notices that he is gone, and comes looking in the barn for her husband. She liberates him, cooks him dinner, and they both laugh at the bestiality that occurred in the barn. 3 days is indeed a long time for anyone to endure.

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What's black and red, and covers most of your body? Fourth degree burns. You should say your goodbyes.

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Why was the little girl sad? She had a grown man sexually assault her.

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Why did the blonde fail her drug test? She's actually never did drugs before but since she didn't show up for appointment, that counts as an automatic fail.

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Evil Witch: Hey Snow White, want an apple. Snow White: No thank you, I just ate, I'm good. Evil Witch: But its good! Snow White: No thanks, I'm good! Evil Witch: Ill put caramel on it!! Snow White: NO THANKS! Evil Witch: FINE!! The Evil Witch then pulled out an AK - 47 and violently murdered Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs.

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What do you call something that shoots out a white gooey liquid? A shampoo bottle

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What's blue and looks like water? Yes.

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Why is this joke funny It isn't

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WHat did the Somalian girl get for Christmas? AIDS

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Why was the Muslim crying? Because his brother got hit by a bus.

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What did Hitler get his son for Christmas? An Ez-bake oven and a GI Jew

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What did the kI'd with cancer get for Christmas? A coffin.

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Why did the blonde turn down prostitution? She knows it is illegal and has better moral values than that.

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What did the cancer patient say before they died? I am in so much pain. I love you all

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A horse walks into a bar, and the bartender says "why the long face?" The horse says "I just found out I have AIDS"

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whats worse then being married to your dog eating your dog out

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why is ginger kid so sad? Because his all family was killed

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How do you make a plumber cry? You kill his family.

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Two men enter a room. Two men and a baby leave the room...

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Knock Knock Who's there? (Pause) Who's there? Hello? Bloody kids

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what did the captcha response say to the man? ofdorno which.

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What is worse than finding an apple in you worm? Biting into an apple and finding 2 worms

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sandwich. roller coaster. brain sprout. cholera, meander. time. rivet.porcupine. mayonaise. frying. x-ray forever.

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How do you upset Muslims? Kill their leader. Whoops, already did.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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