Okay, you seem sincere enough, thing is that I trust you, but your buddies, if you can vouch for them, then I at least know that you are putting your stepmother in danger if you decide to cover for your friends, besides you being such an emotional crybaby kinda gets me into trusting you again.

Why was the man crying? He just got called and the doctor confirmed he had AIDS.

Question: What is worse then a worm in your apple? Answer: A number of different things I would imagine...

A frog and a toad eat a pie and then realize it is weird and then die.

why do police kill so many young black men in America? it's a difficult question that deserves a thoughtful response. many complex issues are at play, but we also feel a sense that something must be done. we cannot ignore some of the forces at work here, yet we cannot all personally take responsibility, either. or maybe he wanted to steal his girl. that shit really happens. THAT SHIT LEGIT HAPAPNES.

Patient: Doctor, I was cleaning my glass eye and accidentally swallowed it. Doctor: OK. Lean over and spread your legs. Patient: (Leans over and spreads his legs). Doctor: My God! This is the first time, in all my years of practice, that I've ever seen an asshole looking back at me

On a scale of 1 to 10, 7 being the highest, what is you favorite color

Who won the race between the turtle and the hare? Well, odds are the two creatures wouldn't race given that animals do not speak. However, if they were, the hare would most likely win a land race because of its powerful legs and agility. However, if the turtle happened to be a seaturtle and the race took place underwater, our dear little beloved turtle would win, having the advantage over the rabbit.

How do you make someone to shut up You tell them to SHUT UP!

This guy was walking down the street and a homeless guy asked him for money. The guy said "Why don't you get a job?" So the homeless guy began to cry because all he wanted was a dime not to be humiliated.

What do you call a black woman that's blind and has 1 leg? Handicapped

What do you call a man with only one eye? Half blind.

A baby seal walks into a club.

Haikus usually make sense, but sometimes they don't refrigerator.

How did the dead baby cross the road? It was stapled to the leg of a chicken.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Daisy's are white, Metallica.

why did the cookie go to the doctor? he had to get a physical to be eligible for his school's football tryouts. his mom drove him there but was very careful not to get his hopes up too high since his chances of actually making the team were slim to none based on the fact that he had no arms or legs but only succulent chocolate chips in every bite.

What's worse than one cat stuck in a tree? Getting raped

A. why'd the chicken cross the road? B.a dog got hit by a bus.

Nock Nock Whose there? Your mom. Stop locking your door.

"Torture the orphans as much as you want. Who they gonna tell? Their parents?"

why did the man beat his wife? why not?

We decided to post a joke on anti-joke and see if we can get any rapings

Wat did the man say to the other man when they were alone. We dont know. They were alone.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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