Many people dont know this about me, but I'm not very famous.

How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

Roommate 1: I want to make food but I'm not going to Roommate 2: Why not? Roommate 1: Because I'm tired and lazy.

Q: What's worse than not having a good relationship? A: Starving Africans

what did the unicorn say to the centaur? nothing because neither exist

Roses are black Violets are black I'm blind

I Have A Dog Named Woof Woof A Chicken Called Clucky A Cow Named Moo And A Pig Named Oink Lol Jks I Was Talking About My Wife

"I see London; I see France..." "Wow. You must have exceptional eyesight."

Why can't Michel Jackson play chess? He's dead

Roses are red, Violets are blue, No, violets are VIOLET, That’s why they’re called “violets.” Edmund Spenser was an idiot.

Whats worse that having cold soup? Cancer

What's the difference between an iPhone and a Samsung Galaxy? Google it, there are many differences.

Why did the piano explode? Beacause someone planted an explosive inside of it.

why can't Michael Jackson bake a pie???? Because he's dead

A man takes a bite into a tuna casserole and burns his tounge. He is also a hermaphradite.

What's the difference between a book and a house? Their names

Why did the fat girl stop eating? She wasn't hungry.

Why did the girl fall off of the swings? Because I threw a refrigerator at her.

What starts with "F" and ends with "UCK"? Fuck.

What's the difference between a blonde and a brunette? The pigmentation of their hair follicles.

Why did the kids put pirahnas in Mr. Hermann's fish tank? So they could eat him.

Why cant Sally ride her bike? Because she has ceribal pausly

knock knock who's there? Ah Maj. Ah Maj who? (say it outloud)

Don't read this or I'll be angry ...…...... Darn you...

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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