Jesus walks into a bar, the bartender shoot the zombie

Roses are red the grass is green now open your legs and let me fill you with cream

Why did the Mexican mow the lawn? He needed money to feed his family and to pay for his daughter's college education.

White men's rights

what happens when a retard hits an iceberg with a gigantic boat? 1517 people die.

Two guys walk into A bar. The third one ducks.

If 2 wrongs make a right and 2 rights make a wrong, then when you have 4 rights=2 wrongs, you have a true statement. If you have 8 rights = 4 wrongs, you have a verified statement.

What did the man do with the naked baby girl? He put some clothes on her and proceded to lay her down for a nap.

What did The Black man have for breakfast? Bran Flakes.

What did Zeus say to Hades? Nothing. Both are mythological beings created by the Greek civilization to explain why many things in the world happened, mostly because of a lack of modern science.

What happens to a blonde girl who is buying drugs off of a drug dealer? Nothing, she was an undercover police officer trying to arrest said drug dealers on the street.

What do you call a Pakistani flying a plane. 9/11

Variants: :) I will always assist you in whatever you want. :( I want to kill you all by myself! Sense? Non? Fuck? Mind? Fission Mailed? Impossible Mission.

What did the boyfriend give his girlfriend for Valentine's Day? AIDS

what did the black mother think of her daghter's white boyfreind? i dont know i cant read minds

I like that, yet I wonder if our subconscious knows what it is what we seek, maybe we need to tell ourselves that we will find happiness, and then the mind leads us there.

What do you call a white guy with 5 black guys. The owner of a basketball team

Why did the mouse cross the road? Because he had been attached to the chicken with a nail gun.

Do you know what the forest fire got for Christmas? Your house

Nero, man, I mean I will hurt you, I am on my way to the hospital, and seriously that pic does not look real, seriously on a hospital? I mean man, I am really sorry! I nearly killed you, how was i supposed to know you do not care about your teeth and take half a bottle of that calcium stuff? My mom? Yeah sure! She laughed at the message you sent her, and if you touch my sis, ill kill you, anyway I am on my way, you better change your mind or I will kick your ass!

I like my women like bacon. Greasy and full of wrinkels

Why did the man cross the road? Because he couldn't get his dick out of the chicken

Why are leprechauns so happy? The grass tickles their balls

Q: What do you get when you cross a chimpanzee and a zebra. A: A crossover between a chimpanzee and a zebra, mixed together.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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