So a man walks into a bar. Unfortunately, he had brittle bone disease, cracked open his skull and bled to death on the pavement.

How many dead rats can you put in your ex-girlfriend's bed? 437.

What does the average fishermen catch Fish

"Where are my shoes?" asked the man. "On your feet," I replied. "You are a paraplegic and have no feeling from the waist down."

What do you call a person with cancer A hospital patient, what did you expect? Oh. Of course you expected Chewbacca.

caoimhin is a dorty carrot

What do you call a guy walking into a bar Dave, because that's his name

What's blue and rhymes purple? Get Out

Why didn't Fred answer his phone? Because Fred is a tree.

Why did the dinosaur rent a DVD in Redbox about a sex? Because he didn't own a Blu-Ray player.

A little boy walks into a bar its fine, he's over 21, he just looks younger.

Chuck Norris farted and... several people looked around uncomfortably, not knowing how to react to the embarrassing situation.

Your uncle jack just helped you off a horse. Now it's your turn to help your uncle jack off a horse.

Hey babe, did it hurt when the doctor cut off your umbilical cord when your mother gave birth to you. Because I have a bellybutton too!

A man walks into a bar. I don't remember the rest, but your mother's a whore.

Why did the plane to New York not land? It was redirected to Boston because of inclement weather.

Knock knock. Who's there? Boo. Boo "who"? Boo Radley. I live down the street.

A rabbi and a priest walk into a bar. The rabbi says "ow my head"

Windows are likes prostitutes. You can have two in the front and two in the back!

was gonna write a really funny "anti-joke" about two dogs and some spagetti but decided instead to tell you about how hard my life is and how much i hate getting up in the morning and just keep you wondering about the spaggetti and the dogs while i kill myself and it all a sudden makes sense as the two dogs are eating my shattered brain that looks like spaggetti wich leaves me wondering , am i spelling spaggetti right?

So a man walks into a bar... ouch

Two Jews walk into a pub. They don't order a ham sandwich.

Why did the boy eat his homework? Because he was hungry. The teacher would stupid to say it was a piece of cake

why did the chicken cross the road? To get away from the sadistic farmer with a loaded shotgun (as the farmer has an extremely large score to settle with the chicken, as his wife was dead, a cause of mad cow disease, an STD from the chicken, as the chicken is a pimp) thus escaping captivity and starting a new life as a free chicken. God save Martin Luther KIng

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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