Thank you Nero, this might not sound apropiate at all, but I am in love with you and have always been, and just want you to know that what I love the most about you is your spirit, your kindness, and sincerely, how you make me feel safe, I think its that you are dead honest to the point where you insult people asking for your opinion, I never had to question what you really mean or want, you just say it out loud, I love you, I realize it must be strange hearing that from someone you see as a daughter, I remember my father too well to consider you one, but I guess I always considered you a hot big brother of sorts. You are 32 huh? You always knew did you not? Why that secret of all things? Ill be arriving as soon as those trained killers of yours show by, and man are they fast and loyal, only you could inspire that love. I know your name is Nero, but I would not mind calling you Axel or at least knight, that's what you have always been for me.

Why did the chicken cross the road? The bold and unpredictable female bird escaped under the horror of the fearful fence of which enclosed the innocent chickens. As she wandered towards the nearby city of magic and dreams she approached by a large, empty road. A mysterious, shining object in the distant caught her eye. As she slowly to a shivering step towards the intereging sparkle, she was ran over by a car. EPIC FAIL LOL!!!!

What did the asian kid do before he got a blood test? He studied.

How many kleptomaniacs does it take to screw in a lightbulb? What lightbulb?

Why was the man lying under a sheet. Because he was dead.

What did the Firefighter say to his crew when they put out the fire.... - Let's go home.

A:You wanna here a good anti joke B:Yeah/sure A:Me too

Max Head fingered himself, HAH

knock knock whose there? you have AIDS

Your mother is so stupid that she had to study, a lot.

Knock knock. Who is there? My wife. My wife who? My wife is a prostitute, selling her own body for money so we can afford drugs for my son who has cancer.

Your girlfriend.

Knock Knock Who's there? The police. Your husband died.

How do you make a firefighter happy? Give him a blowjob and 10 million dollars.

What is black and blue and doesn't like sex? The 6 year old in my basement.

Q: how do you get an clown off a unicycle A:You hit it with a police baton

what's funny about cancer. nothing it is a serious life threating disease with no cure.

How do you drown a blond girl? Forcibly hold her head under water until it enters the lungs and prevents the absorption of oxygen leading to cerebral hypoxia and myocardial infarction.

What did the platypus do whenever he walked into the bar? Nothing. It's a platypus, they don't do much.

Q: Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? A: Getting mauled by a pack of hungry wolves

How many blondes does it take to screw in a light bulb? 1, and they don't have to be blonde, anyone can screw in a light bulb.

A man is eating in a restaurant and says, "Waiter! There's a fly in my soup!" The waiter says, "I'm sorry, can I bring you some salad instead?"

Why did the black man cross the road? He was chasing the chicken

what did the left foot say to the right foot? Nothing, feet don't talk

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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