what's white and 10 inches? nothing....

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Hey, is that your corvette? No, I thought it was yours.

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A bar walks into a man... The man begins screaming uncontrollably as the corner of the building is inserted into his anus. Brick by brick, the bar forces its way inside the man's ass, as blood begins dripping down his legs. The man knows damn well it is impossible for such a large building to be contained inside him, but he grits his teeth and forces his ass open wider. His ribs break, his lungs collapse, and his now lifeless body is stretched into the shape of the bar. The bar is almost entirely consumed before the man's skin gives way to the bulging pressure...with an explosion of blood & organs, the shredded remains of the man are slung-shot around the lot where the bar formerly stood. The bar, now soaked in a mixture of blood & organ fluid, reflects upon the failure of its experiment. For the next attempt, a man of far greater fortitude must be used, so that his body does not burst so easily. Only then will it achieve its dream of becoming the first bar to walk into a man.

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A zebra walks into bar, the surrounding customers in the bar become very intrigued why this exotic creature has wandered from Africa into New york. Before they can come to a concluson animal control opens fire on the creature, splatering its organs onto the tables. This event ruined the night for most customers and they fileout of the bar calmly but sad

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Two blondes were in a parking lot trying to unlock the door of their car with a coat hanger. They had left the keys inside and no-one was around to help.

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Why did the little boy fall off the swing? Because he has no arms.

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What do you call a black pilot? A pilot.

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How do you know when an Asian has robbed your house? You have informed the police, who in turn searched the house for DNA evidence, eventually leading them to the criminal, who just so happened to be a troubled Asian teenager attempting to join a local gang.

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A Mexican man walks into a bar, the bartender asks "haven't you got a damaged liver?" The Mexican replies "haven't you got a job to do?" The Mexican died 2 seconds later

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Don't chop the dinosaur daddy! OK.

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Romney: I think you would raise our debt and make more Americans jobless. Obama: It's just cuz I'm black!

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Why did Hitler shoot himself? Because he found out Chuck Norris was a Jew.

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Roses are brown Violets are brown I should probably water My garden soon.

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What do you do when life gives you lemons? You eat them.

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how many baby's does it take to paint a wall?? depends how hard u throw them

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why do black people like lotion? because everybody else does.

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Q: what happens if a black guy says hi person? A: he says hi person

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a very large and muscly guy walks into a bar and finds a scrawny white guy he asks him if he has ever been in a fight with someone bigger then him the man says no the large man then leaves the bar and they both continue on with their day

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A gay man named pat played on a gay website with a child named Charlie

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Dont listen to your heart all it dose is BEAT BEAT BEAT

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(Pretend you're an orphan.) Knock knock. Who's there? Not your parents.

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Suicide is never funny Unless it's a clown

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"Doctor, Doctor, Help I feel like a pair of curtains" "I've got some cream for that".

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What do you call a deer with no eye? No eye deer ( get it, it's like the red, necked southern speaking states )

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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