How many dead babies does it take to paint a wall? First of all, babies do not have the physical ability or the mental capacity to ever paint a wall, no matter how many of them there are. Second of all, they are dead which probably will not increase their chances of painting said wall.

Knock Knock! But nobody was home and couldn't hear it.

Why did tigger look in the toilet? Because he is being treated in a mental institution and eats his own fecal matter.

why was kade sad? he shit himself

Why is it scientifically proven that even Spider-Man would be a match for Superman? Because none exist. Moral: The only Super Hero... not scientifically proven, but I exist so that makes me stronger than both of them!

Why couldn't the cat drink it's milk? Because it didn't have a face.

What is Hellen Keller's favorite TV show? She doesn't have one - She is blind and deaf.

what is black and white and read all over? A penguin in a blender

Dear Six, Please stop spreading rumors about me and nine. I hear you two also do some pretty nasty things. Love, Seven.

whats worse than the holocaust? nothing

What's the difference between Jews and pizza? One is an adherent to the religion of Judaism, and the other is a doughy bread topped with tomato sauce and cheese. They share virtually no similarities.

why did the woman walk into the kitchen? i don't know, but the better question is why she left in the first place.

In Soviet Russia, the same thing that happens here, happens there.

How many black people does it take to tar a roof? Just one. Unless he wants to do it in a shorter amount of time and calls a few friends to help him.

What did the oak tree say to the pine tree? Nothing tress dont speak regardless of the kind.

why are crocodiles so angry? because they have a lot of teeth but no tooth brush?

What do you call a Mexican that is jumping off a building? A suicidal jumper!

Whats funnier than 24. ... DEEZ NUTS.

A witch walks into a bar and orders a drink. She gets her drink and proceeds to have a great time.

why couldnt the african child eat enough food? he didnt have a mouth.

Most adults can swim. Current government studies are investigating similar skills in babies. With unnecessarily large pools.

What's funny? Nick Sotelo

Ducks smell too dog like animal farms riverside Chinese tofu hat hairy and eat beanie.

How do you make a miner sad? You cut his d*ck off then feed it to his family.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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