Guy walks into a bar and orders a drink. He goes to the restroom and urinates. He comes back and orders another drink. He goes to the restroom again and urinates. He comes back and orders another drink. Guess what happens next? A. He goes to the restroom to urinate B. He buys another drink C. He flirts with a very attractive lady D. Goes home and masturbates

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There was a golfer at the field where people usually golf. he had a golf club. so did the man next to him. The man i spoke of first hit the guy that was next to him with a golf club. Why? because he was angry at the man for shoving socks down his daughters throat and extracted her eyes with a melon scooper. This should not be humorous, the girl got blood and eye juice on her fathers new shoes when she came home.

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Yo mama so dumb she brought a spoon to the Super Bowl! I'm sorry,that was just really rude of me. I've been talking to my therapist and I think this insolent behavior came from my dad. I always wanted his approval but he always liked my brother more and blah blah yak yak.....

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Chicken is a funny word, and the road is a plot device.

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What is worst than a black guy hanging on a tree. A burnt black guy hanging on a tree

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yo mamas so ugly she is often made fun of andridiculed about her appearance.

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what did the black guy say to the white guy? black guy: hello how are you doing white guy: good i guess.... just heard they shut down KFC black guy: that sucks

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How do you keep an idiot in suspense? You watch a suspenseful TV program and pause at the right moment.

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So a plane flies into a world trade centre... That's not funny

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Why did the pelican cross the road? The man did not reply because his mother recently died in a car accident while crossing the road. She also loved pelicans.

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Why does the fat kid no longer have friends? He died after falling out of a tree.

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What do you call a black doctor? Ehh...

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

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roses are grey violets are grey i am a dog woof woof

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an irishman an american and a jihadist get a plane were did they go right through my house

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Knock Knock, Who's there? The Postman. But I wasn't expecting a parcel. Is it for 37? No, Sorry, its for 35.

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Knock, knock. Who's there? Your one and only! Step away from the door, Francheska. You're violating the restraining order.

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how do u get a bonar? u look at your mum!!

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Is it a bird, Is it a plane, I don't know what it is but it's heading straight for the World Trade Centre

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Why doesn't a ducks quack echo? Actually, it does, but the echo is imperceptible to human ears.

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Yolo is for losers, I have 9 lives...meow

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He believed pedestrians had the right

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Whats black and white and musty? A nuns pussy because it never gets used.

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How do you get an elephant into a refrigerator? you open the door and guide him inside

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops