a man was hired for a job. he made a lot of money and was able to support his family.

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How many blonds does it take to screw in a light bulb? ... It shouldn't take anymore than one person to do this job, regardless of there hair color.

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Theaters say silence is golden... Trap silence in a jar, make millions.

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knock knock who's there? A worm, your dead in a coffin.

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KNOCK KNOCK who's there? OUCH! what's your door knob made of? nails?

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What was little Sarah's last Words to johnny before he got hit by the bus??? Can i have your ice cream.

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Why did the squirrel cross the road? it was stapled to the chicken

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Knock, knock. Who's there? "Dwane!" I don't know any Dwane. Perhaps you have the wrong address. "Oh. Sorry to have bothered you!"

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What happened to the boy with cancer? He died.

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What is the diffrence between you and I. I am not sure because i have not meet you yet

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Why did the kid drop his ice cream cone?? Cause he got hit by a bus.

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Why did the man eat the turnip greens? Because he was morbidly obese, and needed to maintain a proper diet.

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If pro is the opposite of con, then what is the opposite of progress? Regression.

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They say that there's more than one way to skin a cat...so far iv only found the one.

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What do you call two Mexicans playing basketball? A waste of time because they just be playing soccer

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Whats worse than the Holocaust? Anal

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what is the difference between a puppy and a baby... ...they are different animals

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Text this number just cuz 16305208722

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Tall asians

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Q:what did the 14 year old girl from Tennessee say to her dad when she lost her virginity? A: Get off of me

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Why did the black guy get a boner? The nitric oxide levels in his trabecular arteries and smooth muscle of his penis rose, causing his arteries to dilate and therefore enlarging his penis.

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A man wakes up after only one hour of sleep due to his insomnia. He starts to cry because his wife just passed away and his parents were recently killed in a car accident. The man gathers his composure, takes a shower, and drives to his minimum wage job. He was expelled from high school for an assault he didnt even commit and has no money to get an education. At work, he accidentally drops a box of valuable, fragile electronic parts and gets fired by his boss. He goes home to his dirty 1 bedroom apartment and contemplates suicide. He decides to wait as his favorite tv show is on. He turns on the tv to the news his show has been cancelled. The man, depressed, suicidal and alone, picks up his .22 and kills himself. There is no God.

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A blonde, wanting to earn some money, decided to hire herself out as a handyman-type and started canvassing a wealthy neighborhood. She went to the front door of the first house and asked the owner if he had any jobs for her to do. "Well, you can paint my porch. How much will you charge?" The blonde said, "How about 50 dollars?" The man agreed and told her that the paint and ladders that she might need were in the garage. The man's wife, inside the house, heard the conversation and said to her husband, "Does she realize that the porch goes all the way around the house?" The man replied, "She should. She was standing on the porch." A short time later, the blonde came to the door to collect her money, I forgot what happens right but it wasn't that funny anyway

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ah-ah. the proper response to an anti joke.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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