What's the difference between a jew and a pizza? A pizza doesn't scream in the oven.

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What do you call black people in a pool? Healthy

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To run away from a fat emo girl with a knife

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What did Timmy's mom think of his art project? Nothing, she screamed and called an ambulance because she saw that he had tripped and fallin onto a pair of scissors and they just so happened to peirce his heart.

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What's wet and pink? Bubblegum!

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What did the black man say when a blond walked into the bar? " Hi Molly"

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What is round and bad-tempered? A vicious circle

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What do you call a boy with no arms and no legs in the water? Bob What do you call that same kid when he's at your doorstep? Matt What do you call that same kid when he's hanging in your room? I don't know, but you should stop calling him names.

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what did batman say to robin to get him into the car? Get in the car

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What did the fat girl mean when she said, " last night was amaziing?" that pizza pie you shared was very well crafted and baked

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What happened when the boy stood up? He had all his limbs hacked off and soon after died.

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What did the girl with cancer get for her birthday? Hairspray.

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Q: why did the white man buy a burge A: cuz he was hungry

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What's worse than burning your tongue drinking hot chocolate? Being shanked by a homeless man.

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what do you call a girl that just took 15 loads to her face? sasha grey.

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Teacher: Why did you fail this test? Student: Because the hamster that gives energy to my brain just died.

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How does a person with Alzheimers' poem go? Roses are red, Roses are red, Roses are red, Wait, what was I doing?

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What's worse then 10 dead babies in 1 tree? 1 dead baby in 10 trees...

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why did the man sell the car and bought worse one? it' s his hoby to restore cars

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An optimistic person says the glass is half full Pessimistic people say the glass is half empty Engineers say the glass is 2 times the size it needs to be.

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A man asked Alexander the Great if he was gay, yet Alexander the Great was not offended. Why? Because "gay" has a rather different connotation than in the modern world than it did in earlier time periods where it meant "happy". Also, Macedonians, Alexander the Great's native people, did not speak English so he would not understand the question. Also Alexander the Great was gay in the sense that he was actually a homosexual.

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roses are red, no one gives a shit, get back in the kitchen and bring me my chicken dips!

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What does it mean when your dog goes to the bathroom on your floor? He hasn't been very well potty trained By: robobob123

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Your mumma is so fat that she wears large clothes.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops