Person 1: Ask me if i'm a tree Person 2: Are you a tree? Person 1: No

Q: What did osama bin laden say to the worker behind the gas station counter? A: May I buy this bag of chips?

What's white and can't climb a tree? A fridge

So my wife was in the kitchen, and I asked her to make me a sandwich. She agreed. I then volunteered to make her one. Lesbian relationships are amazing.

What do you get if you cross a bomb expert, and a homophob? a blowjob

What scares little children and befriends their parents? A clown

what did the little boy say to his sibling? dat not funny!

Why did grandma drop the dish? She had a heart attack and died, falling to the ground and thus bringing the plate with her to the floor.

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Wheres my tractor?

what do you call a jew hanging from a tree? dead

What did the red bag have written on it? Yellow bag

A child wasn't wearing knee pads when he was skateboarding. He proceeded to fall of his board and break his arm

What's funny? Women's rights.

Roses are red Violets are blue My walls are yellow

Why was Jimmy sad? Because he was about to be shot for attempting to assassinate the president.

The Princess is in another castle

Knock knock! Who's there? A doorbell-salesman

It's 4/20. You know what that means? Today is a Wednesday

What's red and every where? A bloody soldier who just stepped on mine.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have Alzheimers, Cheese in toast,

A man walks into a bar. The force of the impact causes serious head trauma and kills him within a matter of minutes.

why did the kid fall off his bike he had a serious illness which made it difficult for him to play sports

A wise man once told me that friends are like cookies. He was a cannibal.

Q: How do you make a fireman cry?? A: Drown his wife

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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