How do you get Jake snow to shut up? Say shut up

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What does DNA stand for? National Dyslexic Assosiation.

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Who wants water? I do.

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A man had two kids who he loved very much but would always come home in a bad mood. On a Friday after returning home, he tells his wife, "I hate my life," then proceeds to take his anger out on her. If you were expecting for this to be a joke, then you clearly have some messed up humor. Abuse in the household isn't to be taken lightly.

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What did the aborted fetus say to the recycling bin? Nothing because it isn't capable of speaking, and it was in the dumpster

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what is black and hangs from the tree in my back yard? a moldy apple.

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What happened to the pleasure robot he pleasured someone in the pussy

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Why did the fat man get thrown out of an all you can eat buffet? He molested a waitress

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What is green and red all over? A christmas tree that is internally bleading.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It was running away from KFC.

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What is the difference between a duck? None! One of their legs are both the same.

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Q: What do you call a gay dinosaur? A: Mega-saur-ass

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Whats as Heavy as a rock and also as light as a feather? Any object in space because the lack of gravity to give the object weight.

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Why couldn't John go to the store for his mother? He had no legs...

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caoimhin is a dorty carrot

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How did the mom quiet her screaming baby? She threw it out the window.

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What's worse than finding half a worm in your apple? dead parents.

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that wall over there ->

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Why did the koala fall of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the other koala fall off the tree? It was stapled to the first koala.

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Yo mama so fat, her Patronus is a cake.

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If the shoe fits....... its probably your size.

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So my teacher came upto me, and says "At the end of this ruler is a idiot" so I said "Which end?" I got detention.

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what is red and can grow hair water i lied about it growing hair and that it is red

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What do you call a dolphin without a head? Dead.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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