Your mother is so ugly that I removed her from my friends list on Facebook.

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whats uglyand cry , and screams mommy ... you after i bitch slap you

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What's the difference between a man and a woman? Generally speaking- biology, except in cases of transexuality.

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Horse walks into a bar... Bartender says It's probably not a good idea that you're in here. You're a very large animal. Any sudden movements, you may injure somebody. I don't know why you're here. None of the glasses are ergonomically designed for you to drink from them. So, you should probably leave.

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Whats the difference between a jew and firewood? Firewood is meant to be burned in a stove or firepit while jews are functioning members of society.

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I saw Scarface uncut last weekend. It was called Face

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mario squashes another goomba when his wife hears of this he kills her 3 children with a gun and hangs herself.

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Why did my penis cross the road? To get to the other vagina.

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Chuck Norris walks up to a baby and punches it in the face He walks away and laughs

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You know what's worse than having a terrible boss? Being unemployed.

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Wife: Where were you all night. Husband: Cheating on you with your sister

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What's blue and thrashes about on the floor? A baby playing in a plastic bag. How do you make a man pregnant? Stick a dead baby up his ass! How do you stop a baby falling down a manhole? Stick a javelin through it's head. How many babies does it take to paint a house? Depends how hard you throw them. -S

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a man walks off of a damn. a damn is not a noun, thus nobody can walk off it

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Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

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A black man walks into a bar. The bartender says, "I wont serve you." The black man says, "Why? Is it because of the color of my skin?" The bartender says, "No, didn't you read the sign on the front door? It says, "People with suits on will not be served." So the black man took off his suit and was kindly served.

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Children and bretheren, stinky cheese Stinkyy cheeeese. Like this or you will smell stinky cheese in your bedroom

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how do you make a cat get out of a tree you shot it

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What's the song that goes like, duh duh da duh duh duh da da do?

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Why did they bury the fireman at the side of the hill? Because he was dead

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my mom texted me telling me that my dog died... then she texted me the letters LOL... i texted back asking wat was funny!? she thought it ment 'lots of love' :p

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mom and dad went into the bedroom after a long day at work the fell asleep

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Why did the boy wipeout on his bike? An old man threw a snake in front of his tire

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He is suicidal and should probably get help.

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I saw a number three walking past me in the street the other day and I thought to my self that's odd.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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