How do you confuse a blonde? You put her in a round room and tell her to find the corner.

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Speaker 1: Why did the chicken cross the road? Speaker 2: Why? Speaker 1: Every member of your immediate, nuclear, and extended family simultaneously contracted Chronic Obstructive Pulmonary Disease (COPD) while being beaten, maimed, raped, tortured, and molested by a deranged serial killer during the sinking of the Titanic, eventually bleeding to death and allowing child rapists to eat their dead bodies.

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So let's pretend two men that had been friends for a very long time, one man asks the other man how he is, so the man tells the other man how he is doing. Then that man asks the other man how he is doing. The two men were engaged in a very interesting conversation. What did the men do next? Nothing. We're pretending, remember?

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What can you tell by a black guy who walks into a bank with a ski mask on? His face was severely disfigured in a horrific accident.

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What do you call white people on a bench? NBA What do you call black people on a bench? RTA

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue Even though I can't tell Because I am color blind

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Brenda said she found a pill to stop the effects of aging! It was a cyanide pill, Brenda is dead.

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What did the cannibal eat for Christmas. Your Mom!

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Why was the man burnt? Cause he fell in a fire

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What did one door say to the other door? Nothing, cause doors don't talk.

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What sound did the Moon Man say to the Moon Woman? Nothing, there isn't an atmosphere so sound cannot travel.

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Why did the woman leave the kitchen? ?? She had just prepared her breakfast and was late for her full-time job as a police officer.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 is a wanted serial killer on the run from the police

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Read This line it the tune of "If your happy and you know it" If you're reading this, Do your homework. Sincerely, Your Teacher

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What do you call a fish with no "i's"? A blind fish.

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what movie can a retarded 8 year old play the lead role in. Zathura

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Your mama is so fat, we are all seriously concerned about her health.

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Listen Nero, you consider us like friends too right?

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A white man is found dead in an alley way, who was the murderer? The black guy trying to climb up the walls to escape.

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How many Polacks does it take to change a lightbulb? Two, one to change the lightbulb, one to hold the ladder.

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What did the robot say to the boy? Nothing, the robot malfunctioned and started to strangle the boy. The authorities tried to get the robot to stop but robots are too strong. When the robot had killed the boy, it self destructed.

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What if algebra teachers were actually pirates, and they're making us find the X so they can search for buried treasure?

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Q. Why do cheetahs run so fast? A. Because their bodies allow them to.

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Haunnaka in 1940's Germany. six thousand people die. in one minute.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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