Why can't Hellen Keller drive? Because she's a woman

Have you ever had a traditional Ethiopian Dinner? Neither have they.

What is green and red and flies 100 miles an hour? Super Frog.

What do George Washington, JFK and Hillary Clinton have in common? They've never been to my house.

Q: Why was the little boy late for school? A: His face was stapled to a wall.

a man touches girls butt ...... she sharts her pants

whats worse than 10 dead babies in a bucket 5 are alive and eating the others

Why does Greg steal? Because he is a thief He is also scouse!

Why did the chicken cross the road? Cause he felt like it.

Jerry Rice is walking down the streets of San Francisco when all of a sudden he hears sirens coming from the next street down. He hurries down the road to see what's happening and sees a huge fire engulfing a 10 story building. And on the top floor, a lady is leaning out the window shouting to the firemen below. FIREMAN: Come on, lady, jump. We have the tarp here, we'll be able to catch you. LADY: No....I can't. My baby, my baby is up here. FIREMAN: Throw the baby down, we'll catch him. LADY: No, you'll miss. I can't leave my baby. Jerry sees this and steps forward. "Hey, I think I can help. Let me have the bullhorn." JERRY: Hey lady, I'm Jerry Rice, the wide receiver for the San Francisco 49er's. I'm the best wide receiver in the game, throw your baby down and I'll catch him, this is what I do for a living. Being a 49er fan herself, the lady recognizes Jerry and throws her baby down to him. Just as she throws it though, a huge gust of wind comes and takes the baby and starts to blow him off course. Jerry sees this and takes off after the baby. He hurdles the line closing off the area, fights through the crowd, dodges a couple of fire fighters, jumps over the car, and dives forward, just making a fingertip catch of the baby. The crowd around him goes wild and starts cheering his amazing catch. So Jerry jumps to his feet, raises his finger into the air, does a two step and then spikes the baby. If you have any dead baby jokes that are not here, I want to hear from you. Email me your dead baby jokes at skitzopathik@hotmail.com and I'll add them to this page.

So, this cheerio is in love with a beautiful frosted cheerio. He asks her on a date. She says no, because she only dates other frosted cheerios. So the cheerio works really hard at his job and is promoted to a honey-nut cheerio. So he asks her out again. She says no because she only dates frosted cheerios. So he works even harder and is made a frosted cheerio. He asks her out again and she accepts. 4 months later after a relationship built on trust and understanding they are married and live a long and fullfilling life together.

What did Mary say to Vishnikharmut? You're name is weird. What did Vishnikharmut say to Mary? Your grammar is incorrect.

Burrinbar Smells like incest anal sex!

When life gives you lemons You've got some lemons.

What's green and fuzzy, and if it falls out of a tree, it'll kill you? A pool table.

Why did the Black man cross the road? To get to Pop-Eye's since KFC is too expensive nowadays. HELL-YA

What's the difference between a dead baby and my dinner??? Nothing...

"Why is Barney purple and green?" "Because the producers of the show decided to make him that way"

How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

You know what makes me smile? Face muscles.

What did John name his dog? Doggy

A bra walks into a dyslexic man.

A man and a bird are on the edge of a cliff. The man falls off and dies and the bird flies away because birds can fly and people can't.

Whats worse than a dumpster full of dead babies? A landfill full of dead babies.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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