What's green, has 4 legs and can kill you if lands on your head? a pool table.

Knock Knock. Who's there? Your landlord your being evicted we need you out in 2 weeks.

What is the difference between 1 and 2? 2 is a higher number than 1.

What is a waste of time and money? Your mother.

Psychic wanted. You know where to apply.

have you ever seen an elephant hiding behind a flower? No? well it must have been hiding pretty well.

what worse than bitting into an apple and finding a worm bitting into a worm and finding an apple

Three men were on a plane. One chucked an apple out the window. Unfortunately, due to the low pressure outside, all the men were sucked out the window.

Q: How much old could a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could chuck Wood A:10.6 cubic metes

What's the difference between a baby and a watermelon? One's fun to smash with a hammer and the other one is a watermelon.

Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 was black.

What happens when you ask a blind guy to drive you somewhere? What happens if you ask a blind guy to drive? You will end up in a four way accident with 8 people dead 2 of which children and 1 baby. You might survive but the blind guy won't so you will have to go to court for him on the issue. You realize that you are terrible when it comes to the law and you get yourself thrown in jail for 2 years. When you get out you are so tired of getting butt raped that you go out and do it to someone else. Then you go back to jail an the process repeats it's self because this is the American justice system. We could work on it a little bit. But yeah, don't ask a blind guy to drive, your butt says thanks.

Where did the paralytic go for a vacation? No where he can't move.

Q: Why is 6 afraid of 7? A: 7 is a registered sex offender.

Your mothers so stupid she is retaking her college courses so she can get a better job and support her family.

A blonde, a redhead and a brunette were on an island. There were loads of other people too - the UK is a pretty popular place to live.

a guy walks into a bar. he buys several drinks, ends up drunk, and crashes into a coffee shop with a goat in the backseat.

Why didnt the chicken cross the road? Because he got hit by a bus.

Who, what, when, why, how, where, and which? Your Honor, i think my client would like to plead guilty.

You know what rhymes with sloth? Rape.

Three Jews walked into a bar. I lied... it was a gas chamber.

What did the one battery say to the other? Nothing. Batteries can't talk.

What do George Washington, JFK and Hillary Clinton have in common? They've never been to my house.

Why did sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock, whos there? Not sally

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...