Why can't Osama bin Laden make anymore terrorist attacks? He's dead.

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A blonde, brunette, and redhead find a cliff that is supposed to turn you into something which you exclaim upon leaping from the cliff. The brunette jumps off and exclaims: BIRD! She thus falls to her death on a ton of pointy rocks. The other two loot her corpse and walk away.

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Why did the Democrat cross the road? Because the glorious leader ordered it for all minions

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Jovan

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what do you do with a drunken sailor? take him back to port because he's not in a right state of mind to be on board a moving vessel

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Q.A duck walks into a bar and asks for grapes.What is the duck asking for? A. Nothing... Ducks can't talk

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Which is heavier, a tonne of feathers or a tonne of lead? It doesn't matter when your loved ones are being torn apart by bears.

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What's the humor in an elevator? Me jumping up and down yelling we r all gonna die.

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Q:What happens when a bug walks into a bar A:It gets stepped on

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why should you not shake a baby? because if it dies it wouldnt know that its parents hate them.

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Why did Li Chong get an A on his math test? He studied.

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Why are black people afraid of lawn mowers? Because whenever you start it, it says run nigga nigga.

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Why did the plane crash? Because the engine wasnt working.

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Brother: Where is my Guitar? Me: To the Left to The left Brother : No its not Me: Everything you own in the box to the to the left Brother : Im telling Mom Me: In the Closet Thats my stuff and if i bought please don't touch Brother: *Opens Closet* This is all Mine! Me: *Takes off headphones*? Huh? Brother: Nevermind - _ -

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How many Jews can you fit into a car? Depending on the size of the car, you should be able to safely fit somewhere between 2 and 8.

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What did the one midget say to the other midget? We r both small

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how many people does it take to change a light bulb....... none..................its stilll bright

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What's worse than crying over spilt milk? The Holocaust.

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Q: how many babies does it take to paint a house red? A: It Depends on how hard you throw them

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Q: Why is it so that antijokes often give you a funny answer? A:.... *hayroll* *crickets* Moral: Im the MoranautBitch!

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What's worse than dying of boredom? ...Being stabbed.

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Whats 9 plus 10 ... WHO FREAKIN CARES! STUPID.

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's wife? No. Oh don't worry then.

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An Irishman walked out of a bar

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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