Why can't monkeys and kuala bears get along? Because they are two entirely different species that cannot communicate with each other...

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What did the black man say to the asian? Hey.

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Knock knock! Who's there? A Doorbell salesman.

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Q. How do you make your neighbor mad? A. Run his kids over.

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Build a man a fire and he will be warm for a night, set a man on fire and he will be warm for the rest of his life.

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Are those two people having sex? Yes, I think they are.

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How do you stop your golf ball from hitting a goose? You dont.

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What do you call an African American who flies a plane? A Pilot

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So this farmer had theses two amazingly fast horses, one named slokey and the other pokey. They would run in the pasture and bring many people to watch. So one day this man says hey, you should enter them in the county derby. So he does and the whole race its slokey, pokey slokey, pokey, and slokey wins by a nose. So after the farmer collects his prize money a man walks up and says, hey those horses are pretty fast, you should enter them in the state derby. So he loads his horses up to the capital and prepares them. When the gates open slokey and pokey dash out of the gate. The whole race its slokey, pokey, slokey, pokey, and slokey wins by a nose. After all the press conferences a man says, hey you should enter those horses in the kentucky derby. So the farmer enters them and drives down to kentucky. The gates open and the whole time its slokey, pokey, slokey, pokey, and slokey wins by a nose. After the press meetings a man says hey you should enter your horses in the european derby. The farmer says no, im going to retire my horses. One fall afternoon pokey says to slokey, man, i wish i could have won a single race. So they race around the huge pasture and the whole way its slokey, pokey, slokey pokey, and pokey wins by a nose! All the farm animals go crazy and the farm dog says "congratulations pokey you finally won!" And pokey says "HOLY SHIT A TALKING DOG!"

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i am a dino. RAWR.

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Apple juice.

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How many Jews can you fit into a Volkswagen Beatle? Two in the front, two in the back, and one hundred in the ash tray.

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What did the sad man say to the happy man? He didn't say anything he was so sad he killed himself.

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What is funnier than 24 69

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whats the difference between a jew and a boy scout? - The boy scout comes home from camp.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? [no one] After that day, Dave moves out of the house assuming that a ghost knocked on his door.

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Why was the black man crying? Becasue his wife and children were killed in a horrific car accident on their way home from church.

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What's worse then a worm in your apple? When your apples a human

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Why did the football coach go to the bank? To make a deposit

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What did the us reporter say? nothing as his head was in a isis members bin

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What is better than tissues? Correct!

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why did the little girl throw a clock out of the window? because she wanted to see time fly

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Jumping out of an airplane without a parachute is a once in a lifetime expeirence.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Now that we got our colors straight. Hey, how ya doin?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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