Why did the bakery run out of the business? They weren't making enough dough

A plane crashed in the rainforest. The survivors all buried themselves because no survival equipment was left and they all sought to kill themselves in their deep state of shock and fear.

a guy fell off a roof of a mansion he died his family cried F.Y.I i have Alzheimers toilet monster

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was the only way to get across

How do you get an elephant into a freezer? You stuff him in there!!

How do you wake up lady gaga Set her alarm clock to an appropriate time

A man walks out of a bar. He didn't bring his driver's license, but managed to do a grand theft auto and unfortunately, crashed on the way home beacuse of a tree. Also, killed 12 people by car

What did the mexican firefighter name his 2 children? Jose and Juan.

If I could Rearrange the alphabet, i would put U and Q together.

a blind man walks into a wall

What's the difference between Paris Hilton and a cow? Cows are ruminants, meaning that they have a digestive system that allows use of otherwise indigestible foods by regurgitating and rechewing them as "cud". Paris Hilton, on the other hand, is a human being. Therefore, her stomach digests the bolus (masticated food) only after it has exited the oesophagus into the body of the organ, where it is digested into chyme and then passed through the pyloric sphincter into the duodenum.

Hey, you are competitive, but let me have the last word here and you will like it. If you keep poking your nose constantly, the effect will actually overlap, making it stronger and stronger, by all means though, make sure you keep some nose working alright?

Your mom is so fat that she saw a school bus full of white children and , thought "I can hardly even remember a time when my body used to be slim." She now keeps track of her diet and exercises regularly,the result of this has been a weight loss of over 95 pounds.

What do you have, if you have fists the can kill someone in one punch? Hulk's DNA

How did Doris respond to Uncle Monty's innapropriate chewing of her nose, ears and eyelids? She cut his head off, placed it an a saucepan, boiled and seasoned it, and then sold it to the middle east. The middle east were very grateful, and sent Doris a camel's penis as a thankyou gift.

Hey Patrick what am i ? Ebola No im Texas! What's the difference?

Hey, is that your corvette. No I thought it was yours.

What is faster? A bottle of milk or a sand-filled pin ball machine? A fighter jet, stupid!

I agree

What do you call a black guy who flys a plane? A pilot.

When life gives you lemons, chuck them at someone's face!

What is purple, stupid, gay, and tells shitty jokes? I don't know. You think of something.

Whats orange at the bottom of the swimming pool? A baby without floaties.

how do you make a plumber cry? you pull its pants up

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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