two peanuts were walking down the street one was assualted

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Black, I dont know if you are kidding around or something, but I cant reach you on the phone pal, I am really sorry about the Valium, it was like only 10 milligrams pal, I mean please man, it was a joke, and Ill break up with Line anyways, I mean Alex and Petter are sorry too okay? Just take the phone, ill be there soon, I mean come on, you are the most cruel person I know, lets talk about it

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whats big and white and falls from the sky\ Refrigerator

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A man walks into a bar and is slowly tearing his life apart. maybe because he is drinking poisonous acid instead of beer

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How do my feet smell? Oh wait. They can't. Feet are not sentient independent beings and therefore cannot experience the five senses, including smell.

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Why was the blonde on the train tracks? Because she was tied up by a madman on crack.

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A hasidic Rabbi and a member of Hezbollah enter a bar in a Jewish settlement. (No, of course they didn't.)

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what do you call something that dosint exist? nothing.

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Why are gay guys so good at being gay? The black guys told them too.

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I'm so hungry I could eat a horse and chase the jockey.

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what did the paraplegic get for his birthday? a bike...

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what's a snake that has no legs a snake

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Roses are grey. Violets are grey. I am colorblind because Iam a dog.

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Why did Hitler commit suicide? Because the Nazis were on the brink of losing the war and Berlin was shortly to be captured by Soviet forces.

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Nock Nock Whose there? Your mom. Stop locking your door.

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What do you call a group of black people in a lamboghini..... Unlikely

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Daisy's are white, Metallica.

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A cat walks into a bar. The bartender says "What would you like to drink?" The cat says "Meow."

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Haikus usually make sense, but sometimes they don't refrigerator.

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Why did the old man die? He was old.

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There was 3 friends named Crap, Manners, and Shut up. They all had mental mothers.

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knock knock whos there? andy andy who? andy gold hi come in

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Three girls are walking in the woods they see tracks one thinks it is a bear the other thinks it is a deer the last one thinks it is a lion They all argue till they get hit by a train and realized they were train tracks

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VITAMIN C!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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