What do you call a black man running faster than a white man? Usain Bolt

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why am i so sexy? I was raised by a dog.

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Q: What do you get when you throw a piece of bread in the oven? A: 6 million Jews

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What's black and white and read all over? Corn, I lied about everything.

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What did the fat man order at McDonalds? Nothing, he was on a diet

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i am an arrow and i did not hit your knee!f

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What did the little boy with a terminal illness get for Christmas? A gun

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my ilkshake brings all the boys in the yard. and the local health inspector's like , have you got a permit to be selling dairy beverages from a home based business?

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What do you call a one legged , one eyed, canadian fisherman called Samuel Browning? Mr Browning unless you are on friendly terms then Sam is fine.

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Where do you find a ocean with no water. on a map. thumbs up for great jokes. please

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who can be more evil than the person who hit my nuts. Adolf Hitler.

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what sucks blows and gets laid in the closet. YOUR MOM VACUMING

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what is funnier than one dead baby in a dumpster? There is nothing funny about the homicide of a minor, and the murder should be immediately investigated.

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roses are red viloites are sour open your legs and give me an hour

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What do you call a man with no arms and no legs sky diving? I don't know, but that sounds like a highly improbable circumstance.

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.

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A man goes in to a town on Friday, stays there for 3 days, and leaves on Friday. How is this possible? He's lying,

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What do a rabbit and a plum have in common? They're both purple expect the rabbit

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why did the girl fall off the slide? she was pushed, by her dad...

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What's grey and can't fly? A castle

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what do you get if you cross a motorway with a wheel barrow? Arrested as a wheelbarrow is not a motorised vehicle, or even a vehicle at all and therefore it is an offence to cross the motorway with it, actually it is probably an offence to cross a motorway with anything now that I come to think of it

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Why did the blond cross the road? The police officer who arrested her for shoplifting parked his car on the other side of the street.

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One morning a guilty man reluctantly told his wife he was having an affair. After a long awkward silence they were then abducted by aliens.

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? The first is a person of the Jewish Faith and the other is a popular item of food.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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