What starts with F and ends in UCK? The F word but im not allowed to say it.

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what do you call a fish with no gills? Dead

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If there's something strange in you neighbourhood, who you gonna call? my mate Jonno who has a gun.

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A: knock knock A: knock knock knock... A: door bell

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Q: what happens when Justin Bieber walks into bar? A: three things, blood on the bar floor, another vister at the celebrity hospital, and Justin Bieber with knifes and darts stuck in his chest!

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there once was a little boy who lived in a little house with his little parents who ate little food. one day the boy went on a website called antijokes and he started to read a joke, by the time he had gotten to the end of the joke he realized that there was no punchline but it was very lenghty and quite pointless.

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My friend, who has struggled with a lifelong battle against anorexia, died yesterday..." "Oh my god, I'm so sorry!" "Yeah, me too. The car ran the stoplight and it was all over...

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How many holes can you poke in my chest, When my chest is by far the best If you believe you can stab Then then grab a knife...that you can grab Skewer my breast Which lies on the best chest And you will discover A man under your covers Yes, keep on pokin' Poke my chest with the knife you are strokin' And then swallow a chode because you are stupid.

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A black man walks into a bar. The barman says 'We don't serve your kind here'. The man leaves and goes to a nearby bar that doesn't have racist staff.

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What's the difference between a ball and a bouncy ball? A bouncy ball is bouncy.

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A jew, a mexican, a priest, a polock, a rabbi, a black guy, a white guy, an alien, a rooster, a duck, a horse, a chicken, a carrot, a chinaman, a plumber, a blond, and a christian are all examples of descriptive nouns.

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Run, Run, As fast as you can, You can't catch me, I'm in a car.

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What did the father say to his child Christmas morning? you're adopted

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your mommas so fat she jumped for joy and got stuck

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Q:What's the difference between a lake? A: a tree, because motorcycles dont have doors... :) crf

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What is worse than finding an apple in you worm? Biting into an apple and finding 2 worms

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What do you call a fart in a box? Your mom's pussy.

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What did Hitler get his son for Christmas? An Ez-bake oven and a GI Jew

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Why is this joke funny It isn't

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What's sad about a pile of dead people? They didn't have life insurance.

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What happened to the child who's mother drank and took drugs while she was pregnant? Dead.

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why did the guy cross the road? Because he felt like it

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Where can I find a good Prostitute? Your Parents House.

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How do you stop the neighbors from calling the police when you play your music too loud? Kill them and use their bodies as noise insulation

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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