whats worse then a child with a dead mom? the baby is still inside.

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A man walks into a bar. He is promptly taken to the hospital where he finds out that he may have a concussion.

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NEVER

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A black guy, a white guy, and a Canadian walk into a bar what do they all have in common. They are all involved in my Joke.

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Why was the girl angry? She's PMSing. Give her a banana and stay away.

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Ask me if I'm a tree. "Are you a tree?" No.

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So a blonde a, a red head, and a brunette crash land on an island, they all died within a week...

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SHUT UP JP

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Man: Hey girl for a minute there I thought I had died and gone to heaven, but now I realize that I am very much alive, and that heaven has been brought to me. Girl: No actually you were right the first time we are both dead right now.

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two paraplegics walk into a bar. oh wait...

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Why did the man open up a umbrella? Because it was raining..

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What do you call a man with no arms or legs in the ocean? Bob

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Can you spot the polar bear Probably not because global warming killed it

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Yesterday, upon the stair, I met a man who wasn't there. I saw him there again today; I've been sectioned. [L]

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Neither did she.

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Why was the penguin popular? He cuts himself.

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What do you do if some idiot throws a grenade at you? Pull the pin and throw it back.

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Joker: Why so serious Man: My mom and dad just got hit by a car, and you just stabbed my friend in the face with a pencil. Joker: Oh well im sorry to hear that.

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What's disabled and red all over. The kid I hit with my car.

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How to kill a mocking bird? Stab it

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What do you call an Arabic man who crashed a plane into a business building? A careless pilot whose recklessness caused him to crash into a building. His stupidity and lack of plane control skill led to a horrible accident that involved the death of thousands of innocent people and the death of many business people's office pets.

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What animal was two legs and bleeds a lot? half a dog

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Knock Knock!! Who's there? The Bailiffs, now get out.

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A guy takes out his club and hits a baby seal with a fine for $50 for littering and threatens to smash the seal's favorite ceramic figurine with the club if he doesn't pay the fine. The man is a park ranger and takes littering very seriously.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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