Why did Austin Bell smell like tuna? He had sea food at Joes Crab Shack

thumb_up thumb_down

A Mexican guy, a black guy, and an ISIS member walk into a bar. The black and Mexican men, realizing the potential danger in the situation quickly exit the bar and alert the proper authorities. $

thumb_up thumb_down

jasper walks into a bar, he sees an elephant and can't believe his eyes. he says "HORGWARSH!"

thumb_up thumb_down

Why did the chicken cross the road. ... It didn't.

thumb_up thumb_down

Safety in numbers? Try telling that too six million Jews.

thumb_up thumb_down

A Polish immigrant goes to the Department of Motor Vehicles to apply for a driver’s license. He has to take an eye test. They show him a card with the letters C Z W I X N O S T A C Z. “Can you read this?” the optician asks. “Read it?” the Polish guy replies, “No, sir. Allow me to put on my glasses."

thumb_up thumb_down

What do you call an orange fruit? An Orange.

thumb_up thumb_down

Why Was the student driver using his cell phone in the car? Because he had gotten in a mild accident with a midsized sedan so he was quickly dialing his AAA agent for roadside assistance so he can get back to his loving family and three children

thumb_up thumb_down

A man and a six year old boy are walking along a path through the woods on a moonless night. "Gee mister, I'm scared!" says the boy. "You're scared?" says the man. "I have to walk back alone!"

thumb_up thumb_down

What's the difference between a black man and a orange? One is a fruit and other isn't

thumb_up thumb_down

Mike: Johnny pass me the sauce Johnny: I can't pass you the sauce Mike: Johnny pass me the sauce Johnny: I can't pass you the sauce Johnny could pass Mike the sauce as he has no arms and Mike kept on asking as he has short onset alzheimer's.

thumb_up thumb_down

What is brown and smells bad? A white person that had been bathed in brown paint, and didn't shower for the next month, and rubbed poop all over them, and rubbed diarrhea all over them and rubbed rock poop all over them and rubbed pee all over them, and rubbed mud all over them, and pooped in a bottle.

thumb_up thumb_down

A man walks into a bar. He says ouch.

thumb_up thumb_down

What do you call a fish with no eyes? Dead.

thumb_up thumb_down

Roses are red, violets are blue, I have to go to the bathroom.

thumb_up thumb_down

So Colton Yepma walks in to Accounting and proceeds to read jokes

thumb_up thumb_down

why did the mexican work for a lawn care service I don't know why don't you ask him

thumb_up thumb_down

Ask me if I'm a tree "are you a tree?" No

thumb_up thumb_down

Roses are red, Violets are red, Trees are red, FUCK, MY GARDEN IS ON FIRE!

thumb_up thumb_down

Why was the protester on the floor? Because the protest had become a riot, and police brutality is a serious issue.

thumb_up thumb_down

Why don't you make like a tree, and get out of here.

thumb_up thumb_down

Hey Johnny what's after 2?? 3.

thumb_up thumb_down

why did the kid strike out in baseball he had leprosy and his arms were amputated

thumb_up thumb_down

roses are red, violets are blue, im a bad poet, text me. LMFAO

thumb_up thumb_down

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops