What did the homeless man get for his birthday? AIDS

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Why does the girl continue to cry repetently everyday? Because she found out she was diagnosed with terminal cancer.

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Sherlock Holmes and Dr. Watson are camping out. After they set up their tent and get inside to go to sleep, they look up at the stars. Holmes asks Watson to make a deduction. "Well, Holmes, I think it's highly probable that other planets outside our own, among those many stars up there, could have sentient life." Holmes points up and says, "Someone stole our tent, you idiot."

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Q: What happens when eight men throw purple at a rain coat? A: Mud-flaps, because electricity can't power a vagina.

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What do you call a half man half manatee? A manatee

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Why was six afraid of seven? Back when seven was in Vietnam, he sufferd Posttraumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD) and constantly has flash backs and irrational thoughts of six being with the veitnamese alliance and tries to viciously molest six whenever he runs out of anxiety medication.

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A smiling Frog talks with a lion O O U What do u eat for breakfast lion? V V T T Smiling frogs __(___ |____| O O -

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What's black and white and in the desert? Tourists being held hostage by a tribe.

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Well I do want it to end now but...WHAT? How did you get that trough? I thought hypnosis was supposed to increase awareness and focus.

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whats big, white and will kill someone if it falls out of a tree? a refridgerater

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Q-What do you call a dog with no legs? A-Nothing because he cant come over to you anyway..

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Q: What's the difference between a Boyscout and a Jew? A: Boyscouts come home from camp.

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What does? 42

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A Russian gentleman walks into a bar and requests a vodka which the bartender promptly supplies. Shortly thereafter a Turkish gentleman enters escorting a Llama on a leash and requests a vodka to which the bartender responds: "Your animal is not allowed on the premise, I am going to have to ask you to leave." The Turkish gentleman apologizes for his ignorance of the local customs and excuses himself, and shortly thereafter the Russian finishes his Vodka, pays, and leaves as well.

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Why did the bakery run out of the business? They weren't making enough dough

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Have you heats about the Guy who's parents died in à car crash... No He killen himself because of hus parents Deathstars

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whats worse than getting bit by a tick. getting bit by a deer tick that as lyme disease.

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What did the cow say to the chicken? - Muuuuhhhhhhhhh!

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What did the pregnant 16 year old get for her birthday? A miscarriage

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A black man, a jew, a hispanic, and an asian are the only survivors of a plane crash, and end up on a deserted island, what do they do? Die.

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If I could Rearrange the alphabet, i would put U and Q together.

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How did 3 fat women fit under 1 small umbrella and not get wet? It wasn't raining!

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Your muma is so ugly she went to a ugly competition and got kicked out "no pros aloud".

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He was being raped and was fugitive lot trying to escape, to no avail.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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