Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

Pretend you are in a box and there is no way out. How do you get out? You don't

"Knock knock." "Who's there?" "Ben." Ben who?" "Ben Dover!" "Ben,it's been 7 years. I already moved on and have a new husband and family. Stop coming here or I'm calling the police."

why couldn't the black man get a job? Because he was a violent sociopath with a criminal record.

knock knock whoses there whose home whoses home who? you

Omar the Magnificent is performing a huge magic show at a theater in New York City. His final trick will be to have his assistant saw him in half in front of the sold out crowd. Omar never knew how other magicians perform the trick. The crowd of hundreds watches Omar's assistant brutally murder him onstage and many require mental therapy for years to come.

What do you get if Justin Bieber and Miley Cyrus have a baby? The apocalypse

what happened to the batsman with bad footwork? he got out what did the batsman do when he got out? he left the ground due to the nature of the ruling

What's stupid a light bulb.

A jewish man walks into a bar has a drink, then walks out of the bar.

whats worse than four babies in a box? one baby in four boxes

Jesus can can WALK on WATER, but Chuck Norris can SWIM in it.

Why did the man scream when his dog ran into the room? Because he was afraid of dogs.

Why couldn't the man ever reach his dream of becoming a professional athlete? He was pronounced with Alzheimer at a young age and could never remember his dream the next day.

What did the boy with cancer get for his birthday? Roses on his tombstone.

A elderly man was driving down the freeway when he got a call from his wife. He answered the phone and his wife said "Be careful dear, I just heard on the news that someone is driving the wrong way on the freeway." The wife then heard a loud crash over the phone as the drunk driver going the wrong way slammed head first into her husbands car, killing them both intstantly.

What's the difference between a pile of dead babies and a brand new Ferrari? I don't have a Ferrari in my garage.

What's worse than 13 babies stapled to one tree? One baby stapled to 13 trees...

you will like this because i am black.

Why would you kill a black man? Well, murderers have different motives, the most common of these are revenge or a psychological illness.

A duck, a goose, a turkey and a bald eagle were all flying together. All four of them were shot and killed by drunk hunters with machine guns. The hunters were promptly arrested by police authorities for shooting their national symbol. They were found guilty, and the other three birds were cooked for their last meals.

I wondered why the piano was getting bigger. Then it hit me... I'm sorry I have visual agnosia

why was 6 afraid of 9? because 7 ate 9 and 6 is afraid of ghosts

A german police officer sees a Rabbi. Nothing happens, it's 2011

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...