Roses are red, violets are blue, purple is a color, I like grilled cheese

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Yes you better be sorry, I'm gonna suck my mums p e n i s tonight! - Dylan Hodge

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why did the baby fall down the steps? Because there was big earth quake that blocked his parents on the other side of the house, therefor leaving no one capable of getting to him befor falling

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How many Jews can you fit in a car? It really depends on the make and model of the car, as well as the relative size and weight of the people in question, but legally you can only have as many people in the car as there are seatbelts available for them.

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What's sad about a girl getting hit in the face with a shovel? The shovel got dented..

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It was the week of the school formal and a girl rang up her date and said I don't have a dress for the formal. He said ok the lets go out and buy one. So they went to the dress shop to buy one but the line was really, really long so they waited in the dress line for ages and ages until they finally got to the front, paid and walked out. As they did, the girl said well I suppose you need a suit, so they went to the suit shop, and again, the suit line was really long but they waited in the suit line and they finally got to the front, paid and walked out. Then the guy said, well if we want to go to the formal in style, then we will need a limo. So they went to the limo shop but the limo line was really long as well. But again, they waited in the limo line and they got to the front, paid and left. It was finally the night of the formal, she had her dress, he had his suit and they arrived in their limo. Everyone was having a great time and the the girl said to her partner, I'm a bit thirsty could you please get me a drink? So the guy went over to the drinks table and went to get a glass of punch but there was no punch line.

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Q. Whats black and red all over? A. A black wall thats been painted red.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the chicken fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the monkey.

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Roger D. ASS , stops, has a ponder , and walks out of a s.t.i clinic ,without being seen

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What's worse than leaving the maternity ward with the wrong child? Being a parent.

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Micael Jackson enters a bar. Everyone screams, and then someone runs over and pulls the cheap mask off the impersonator's face. Michael Jackson IS DEAD, get over it

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chickens, roads, horses, bars,roses, violets, sally, knock, knock, fnord

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She has no arms.

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What did the cat say to the dog? Miaow. What did the dog say to the cat? Miaow.

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Why did the black man across the road? just kidding he didnt make it across the road i hit him with my car

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A black man has just died on your porch. What do you do? Immediately call for medical assistance and perform CPR.

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Awesome! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> minecraftnow.us <

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An apple a day keeps the doctor away. Unless your father is a doctor and you live with him.

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whats worse than walking in to the doctors office and he says you got aids heaps of stuff can be worse but haha you got aids

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Q: Whats red and not a penis A: A lot of things

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Lebron traveled

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Who's gay? Justin Beaver

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Why did the Mexican fall off of a cliff? He lost is ballence.

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When Chuck Norris claps, his two hands slam together, creating rather loud soud.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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