what do you call a fish with no gills? Dead

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Whats cooler than cool? nothing because cool does not have a defined temperature therefore nothing can be cooler than it.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

A jew, a mexican, a priest, a polock, a rabbi, a black guy, a white guy, an alien, a rooster, a duck, a horse, a chicken, a carrot, a chinaman, a plumber, a blond, and a christian are all examples of descriptive nouns.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

A fat man orders a pizza. Then after eating it, he gets a eart attack due to his high cholesterol and lack of exercise

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Why is the black guy jobless? He's 3 years old.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Roses are red. Violets are blue. I am epileptic. SLAWWAWASWAKHINGAGAGAGAKIHARGAVBAZSAWAWAWAWAAAAA

thumb_up thumb_down -22

How do you scare a lawyer? Threaten to kill his family.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

What did the little boy say before he succumbed to cancer? Nothing. It was too painful.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

What's the difference between a ball and a bouncy ball? A bouncy ball is bouncy.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Wow! I've seen this joke before!

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Yo mama is so old, she might die soon! - Louis

thumb_up thumb_down -22

There was a man driving his truck down a dark road, half way down the road he see's a man walking alone. He stops beside him, winds down his window and says "Oi mate, need a lift"? The man replies "yeah sure, but can i sleep in the back of the truck"? The driver replies "Yeah sure" later on as the man is sleeping he hears a big bang. "what was that" the man asks. The driver says "Don't worry i just hit a cow, go back to sleep". time goes by and he hears another bang. "W-what was that". "Don't worry i just hit a moose, go back to sleep and ill wake you when we arrive". Few moments latter he hears a tick tick bang. He gets up and yells "What was that"? The driver replies "Dont worry mate i just hit a aboriginal" The man replies "What was those two ticks before that"?. The driver says "I had to drive through two fences to hit the bastard"

thumb_up thumb_down -22

What did the frog say when he heard his family was dead? "ribbit"

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Why did the guy fall asleep? Because he's in a coma.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

a black man, a Jew, a Chinese man and a polar bear walk into a bar, the bar tender says sorry no animals allowed in the bar, so the polar bear left and the other three ordered some drinks and had a nice time

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Did you know that Hellen Keller had a roller coaster in her backyard? Neither did she

thumb_up thumb_down -22

What is the crunchiest part of a Vegetable? It depends if by Vegetable you mean the food or the disabled human incapable of carrying out simple, daily tasks, in which case this joke would be referring to canibalism.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Knock Knock? Who's there? Sanderson. Sanderson who? You're boyfriend. Let me in. No, I'm a bit busy chopping up dead bodies. Come back in a bit. Oh let me help you! I like the way the blood runs out of the fresh ones!

thumb_up thumb_down -22

A polish guy Is sick of being made fun of for his ethnicity, so he decides that he is going to act Italian thinking that no one makes fun of Italians. He stays home for weeks to practice this and one day walks out, up to a store and says"eh, get me some lasagna and zucchini !" the man at the store asks if he's polish.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Neil Armstrong was the first man to walk on the moon and Micheal Jackson molests little boys.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

What happened to the Jew who went to France? He had a very enjoyable time and visited many of the remarkable landmarks around the country.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

What did the piano say to the ice cube? Dude, get back in the freezer or you are going to melt!

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Roses are red, violets are blue, your face belong in the zoo, don't worry I get there too, not in the cage, just visiting you :)

thumb_up thumb_down -22

What do a Nazi and a Democrat have in common? They are both members of a highly supported political faction.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops