Nero Octavios reporting, so far all of our sectors worldwide excluding Spain, Italy and Ground Zero are secure, Nero Augustus is severely wounded but will make it, and despite the our intel Necrissa Angelo is alive and well. We have one single worry though Nero7 the brunt force of the terror attack was large and powerful, yet resistance was incredibly light when we went for the counter-strike, too light, we might have to ready ourselves for some sort of reprisal here.

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What did Sammy get for Christmas? Raped.

casey, that is all, ruddel, that is all, hi mark

What do you call a black person that plays golf? Jack, his name is Jack.

what do you call someone who cant breathe? dead

What did the sad man say to the happy man? He didn't say anything he was so sad he killed himself.

when geese fly in a v formation, why is one side always longer then the other? Because you touch yourself at night...

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

What is the difference between a mallard with a cold and you? One is a sick duck I forget how this ends, but your mother is a whore.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I can not rhyme, Show me your tits

What's Worse Than Falling Over? .......Rape.

Why couldn't Jimmy eat his food? Because I threw a microwave at him

How do you get a drummer off your doorstep? Ask politely.

What do you call a fish with no "i's"? A blind fish.

This is an anti-joke.

What did the disabled kid do on friday? He fell down a flight of stairs.

A girl walked into a bar and sat next to a man. She asked what he was drinking. He said something that makes you fly. She didn't believe him. He then went up to the roof, jumped off and walked back in the front door. She got the drink then tried to jump off the roof, and died on impact. The bartender said to the man "You're a real asshole when you're drunk superman."

what happened when u got some swag? i don't know u still don't have any

What were the muslims doing on the plane? Probably going somewhere that was too far to walk or drive.... just like everyone else on the plane.

What dinosaur makes honey? The Bee Rex.

How many sheets did the Asian want on his bed? "You sheet on my bed I kill you!"

Q: Why did your mom cross the street? A: Because she was so ugly that she fell off both sides of the bed

Why don't some black men have jobs? Because they won't work

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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