What's worse than a worm in your apple? Two worms in your apple.

Once there was an ugly barnical, He was so ugly that everyone died. The end.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Why? To get to your house. Knock knock. Who's there? The chicken.

Why can't you lie to atoms? Because they make up everything!

Why was the orphan's christmas sad? He got a violent chest infection and died.

Kanye West walks into a bar. As he is a very popular celebrity, he is recognized instantly. The patrons mob him, asking for pictures and autographs. He is in a pleasant humour that evening, so he indulges them. Some laughs are had, he buys lots of drinks, and takes home two beautiful women. Such is the life of a celebrity. ...but that still doesn't make him happy.

Roses Are Red , Violets Are Blue , Go Die .

what does I.C.T mean when a teacher says it it means I cant teach

Why did Suzie's friend put rubbish in her mouth? Because Suzie is a rubbish bin.

What do you call a Black White supremisist? Well you see the Black man was blind and thought he was a racists redneck. He then contracted cancer.

according to the ewspickle, it is Dumbledore's favorite food.

what is the difference between a puppy and a baby... ...they are different animals

What's the difference between cancer and my grandmother? She doesn't have cancer.

Why did Michael Jackson name his kid blanket? Because after years of drug abuse and sexual insecurity led to him thinking unrealistically during the birth of his children.

What do you call a cat with 1 eye, 4 legs, and its tongue out? Road kill.

Q:what did the 14 year old girl from Tennessee say to her dad when she lost her virginity? A: Get off of me

What did the chicken say when it finally crossed the road? - nothing, its a chicken

A jewish man walks into a bar has a drink, then walks out of the bar.

what did a poor guys get for christmast ? brain tumor.

What did the apple say to the banana? Nothing, apples can't talk

An Jewish man worked at a bank, and ate chicken noodles for lunch and then stabbed and man playing the saxophone.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Who let the chickens out?!

Knock knock Who's there? The Land Lord The Land Lord who? I am here to evict you.

Why can't Timmy go on any rollercoasters? Because he's morbidly obese and it would a safety hazard.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...