What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

What do you call the man with no arms or legs, swimming in the bay? Bob.

Did you hear about that creepy guy on Facebook? He was un-friended

What did the apple say to the carrot? Nothing, apples don't talk

What did the black kid say to the white kid My parents are slaves

How do you make a clown stop smiling? hit him with an axe

Two men are walking down the street. They both don't make eye contact and continue walking.

roses are red violets should be purple

Why did the little boy fall off the swing? Because he had no arms. Why did no one help him up? Because nobody liked him.

What do you get when you mix a donkey with a bungee cord? My bouncy ass

Your momma soo fat.... that if she doesnt start exercising and eating right she will be more likely to get adult onset diabetes.

knock knock who's there ?

Why was the cat meowing at the chicken? Because Sally got hit by a fridge.

i was quite upset when my girlfriend called me a peodifile, what does she know, shes only 6.

A kid walks in to a bar. The bartender asks the boy where his parents are and he replies that he does not know. They call the police who proceed to try to contact the boy's parents. They have gone missing so the boy must go up for adoption. He gets adopted by an abusive family and runs away. Without a family, job, or money, he could not afford a house. He lived alone in a box until he died of starvation.

Why did the student fail his test? Because he has AIDS darragh hamilton

One I grabbed a lump of coal, and crushed it with such strength, that a human being was born out of it. That man is today known as Chuck Norris. Nero.

Why couldn't the blond get into the library? Because the library was closed therefore the door was locked.

three mexicans walk into a bar... the bartender says get the fuck out!

So 2 guys are curious if there is baseball I heaven... So they say when either of them dies they have to come back as a spirit and tell the other man if there is baseball in heaven One of the guys dies and comes back as a spirit... He comes to the other man and says... I've got some good news and some bad news The man says what's the the good news? The spirit says the good news is there is baseball in heaven So the man says what's the bad news?? The spirit says... Your pitching Tuesday night!

To men stay at the bar all night drinking non stop. They soon are rushed to the hospital to get their stomachs pumped.

A man bets that his friend can't drink five beers in a row. His friend does it and says "See, I told you I can do it!" The man replies "No, I can't see, I'm blind."

Why do the Chinese eat cats? Because it is a good source of protein that is relatively easy to obtain. Really, it's not much different than killing pigs for food.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the chicken was trying to escape from the sad and depressing environment that surrounded him on the side he thus came from. Alas, he did not know that he would be soon hit by a drunk truck driver, who would also die, in a bright explosion of morbid flames and screams.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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