pickles are green infection is yellow all the girls i know call me a good fellow

How do you starve a black man? You deny his foodstamps ~Katie&Lena&Shelbey(:

A women was driving along in her brand new, swanky, red ferrari when she spotted a red light in the distance. She stopped steadily, following the rules of the road. All of a sudden a loud bang came from behind her where a young driver had hit her at 50 mph. They both come to an abrupt stop and exited their vehicles. The women says "Idiot, you just hit me!" The boys says "oh don't worry, I have insurance."

What was the last thing that went through the crashing helicopter pilot's head? The propeller.

how do you drown a blonde in a kitty pool? put a scratch and sniff sticker at the bottom

What do you get when you cross two things that are seemingly unrelated? A play on words.

What happened when the car hit the man? He died.

a priest, a rabbi, and a nun walk into a bar...and the bartender goes...what is this a joke? mr. healey

So there were these two ovens in a muffin. One oven said "Holy fuck it's muffiny in here." The other oven said "Holy fuck a talking oven!"

Why did the penis cross the road? Because a man was humping the chicken

What is worse than catching someone trying to cheat by looking at your exam? Getting struck by lightning.

You wanna pop a bottle? I hope you are referring to bottles of water as I am underage and I refuse to partake in any said consumption of alcoholic beverages

Why did the clown have a heart attack? He had long term heart problems.

why dose micheal jackson like 29 year olds Because there is 20 of them

9

Hey I just meet you. And this is crazy, but im a Zombie. And you looks tasty!

Why was Timmy sad? While helping his dad hang Christmas light, he got tangled up in them and fell down. While falling he grabbed a wire, which caused a spark. This spark lit the house on fire. Since he broke most of the bones in his body from falling he could not run away. The house proceeded to collapse an poor Timmy seriously injuring and hideously disfiguring him. By the time the ambulance got there, Timmy was the only survivor for his parents died of smoke inhalation. Since he had no other living relatives he was forced to live in an orphanage for the rest of his childhood. That is why Timmy is sad.

Why was the black man carrying the television away from the store? He bought it

why did the monkey fall out of the tree? cause it was dead

Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

Which is heavier, a tonne of feathers or a tonne of lead? It doesn't matter when your loved ones are being torn apart by bears.

What did the kI'd with cancer get for Christmas? A coffin.

Wow! I've seen this joke before!

what do you call a fish with no gills? Dead

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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