What do you call a Mexican policeman? Officer.

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1. The name of your street 2. The name of your pet 3. Your favorite activity 4. The color of your eyes 5. The number of shoes you own Now fill in the blank with the corresponding number to your answers. "One day I was ___3___ my dog when a pornstar named __(1)__ ___(2)___ asked me how many times I can ___(3)____ myself. I said ___(5)___ times and the juice that came out of me was __(4)___."

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Is your refrigerator running? Yes. Good because it is important to keep food chilled to prevent it from spoiling and wasting you money

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A girl asks her best friends: Why are you only wearing one earring? The best friends replies: Because I took the other one out.

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"Knock knock" "Who's there?" "Fairy floss" "Fairy floss who?" "I'm sugar coating your Cancer diagnoses"

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Knock knock Come in

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What's the difference between your dog and your mother? Your dog doesn't think you're a disgrace to the family

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What's funnier than British people ? Their tea in the Harbor

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Comes a giraffe on a scooter to the hospital and asks: 'can I have some flour?'.

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Scream went into the bar. The bartender says," Why the long face?" "..." *facepalm*

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What do you call a fish with no eyes? A fsh. What do you call a deer with no eyes? No Idear. What do you call a deer with no legs or no eyes? Still no idear.

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Why would a dog sniff another dog's butt hole? Because that is what they do.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? If you don't know the answer by now, there's something wrong with you.

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What is a six letter word for cactus? Cactus

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What did Johnny get for Christmas? Drugs, Johnny was a convicted drug dealer, age 19.

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What did the homosexual farmer say when he answered the phone? Hello

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Dwarf Shortage

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Hey I just met you, And this is crazy, I've got dementia, Hey I just met you.

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My friends all use twitter but i dont know how to use it, so i said i will carry a megaphone around saying what i am doing at random times. Like yesterday i was in the library so i said into my megaphone "i am in the library" Yay i got 3 new followers, 2 of them were cops. Jokes From Blox Computers Corporation [Thailand] Bellow Joke In Thai: ?????? Twitter ???????????????? ??????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????? ? ???????????????????????????? ???????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????? "i am ??????????" ??????????????? 3, 2 ????????????????????

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

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In other news, a Florida man was arrested today for stealing candy...with a knife.

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why did the baby cross the road? It was stapled to the chicken.

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God hates fags, no...god i'snt real

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Why was the black man unemployed and in debt? Because current socio-economic realities and systematic racial discrimination place him at a disadvantage in terms of education and employment. Indeed, it is statistically probable that he was raised below the poverty-line, greatly limiting his opportunities from a young age.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops