Hey I just met you, and this is crazy, but here's a free drink, you'll wake up in my basement.

What did the little boy with no arms and legs get for Christmas? Cancer.

Why was i sad when 4 black people in a cadillac fell over a cliff. The car blew up...

The little girl asks her father "Daddy why is santa fat?" "you have to exist to lose weight" he answered

what do you call a old guy who touches children? my dad

wheres an unexpected place to find sand? a human pancreas.

How much does a dead battery cost? Nothing, it's free of charge.

Why was the black guy sad? Because he has a knife through his throat

What did the man want a car for his birthday? 7.

What do you call a black man in church? Religious

why did the man sell the car and bought worse one? it' s his hoby to restore cars

If there's something strange in your neighborhood, who you gonna call? The Police.

If pro is the opposite of con, then what is the opposite of progress? Regression.

What's brown and smells like shit? An oddly shaped birthmark on a dirty homeless man

what's better than being stabbed in the testicles with a biro? the Silversun Pickup's album Neck of the Woods

How do you make an egg laugh? You can't. Eggs are inanimate objects which are incapable of emotion, thus laughter.

Why did whitney Houston become a drug addict? Because she made some very bad decisions in her life.

What's worse than burning your tongue drinking hot chocolate? Being shanked by a homeless man.

How do you make spongebob come to Life? You kiss him????????

Lollies are sweet warheads are sour, open your legs and feel my power

My dog dumps in my house she looks at me and says rut row

boling water: why is it taking so long for you to get hard? egg: sorry, it's just because i recently got laid by a chick.

What happened when the man turned on his TV? It was tuned to the Discovery Channel

Jack and Jill went up the hill. But it was winter and they froze to death

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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