What did the Nazi Death Camp Guard say to the escaping prisoner? - Nothing. He shot him in his face.

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whats the biggest ever snake found ? i dont know i dont study snakes :O

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What do you get when you cross an own and a bungee cord? My ass

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How do you make Yoda sad? Kill all of his friends.

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I am a schizophrenic, so am I.

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What happened to the man who ate a piece of pizza after doing a lot of sit ups, while rubbing the belly of a fat man, and feeding his baby at the same time? He Lived

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Q. What do you call a retarted guy? A. Whatever his name happens to be

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Why did tigger look in the toilet? Because he is being treated in a mental institution and eats his own fecal matter.

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Actually it was me Josh brown

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A man jumps of the roof of his building. The superindentant now owns the building and the man who jumped off the building has 59 fractures. Oh and he died.

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Why was the black man running down the street with a suitcase? He was late for work.

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Why did the little girl cry? She lives in Haiti.

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What does a man and an orange have in common? Nothing.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? His wife and children had just been struck by a moving vehicle traveling at approximately 45 miles per hour trying to cross the same road. He ran across the road to comfort his dying wife and two children as they took their final breaths. The chicken was also not really a chicken but a middle-aged man who had recently been laid off his job and diagnosed wiuth an incureable disease.

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A gay man,a black woman,a seven year old child,a liberal,an atheist and an asian walk into a building. A hijacked plane flies into the tower they were in and kills them all on a cold September morning.

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They say Jesus Christ walked on water and that humans are made up of 70% water...... So if I walk on babies, am I 70% Jesus?

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Why did the boy go to his room? Because his father told him to.

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Why did the frog commit suicide? Because his mother was a typewriter

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He was playing tic-tac-toe with a friend.

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What did the little boy get for christmas? Nothing. He's jewish

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Why did the girl fall off the swings? -because she had no arms

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If you don`t see a banner here, it doesn`t mean it wont come back to annoy you whenever it feels like.... P.S, Advertising helps us get rich while permanently harming your ability to focus, Please be understanding! PS: Why the hell do they use capital letters after you know, Commas? its, Weird!

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What did the man with candy say to the little boy? I have Candy.

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Why'd the blonde jump out the window? To kill herself

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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