A man walks into the office for an appointment. The doctor proceeds to perform the usual examinations, before asking the man to turn his head and cough. As is standard, he feels the man's testicles to check for irregularities. The man jokes, "Say doc, couldn't you at least ask me to dinner first?" The doctor replies, "You have testicular cancer." He died a month later.

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Q: What did the dog say to the owner when he took him to the vet? A: Nothing. It's a dog. It can't talk.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Certainly not to have its motives questioned!

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When geese fly south, why is one side of the V usually longer than the other? There are more geese on that side.

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Why did the asian man go to the bar with a black man? Because they both wanted to enjoy a few beers in the company of another.

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roses are blue violets are red... i have to use the bathroom

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I am strangling you. Do you see my arms? I AM FREAKEN STRANGLING YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!11

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Do you believe that if I theoretically am unmatched in many ways, would feel less alone if I decided to become more like the rest?

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Why do Squirrels accidentally plant millions of trees. Because they bury their nuts and forget where they are.

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Why did the accountant die?A terrorist put a bomb under his desk.

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joe: guess what. Bob: what. Joe: nothing I just wanted to talk

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Why did little Sally fall off the swing? Because Sally has no arms. Knock knock! Who's there? Not Sally.

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what's the square root of pi? nothing. why would you add roots to pie, how gross.

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there was a turkey sandwhich..... a ham sandwhich.... and a bologna sandwhich..... they had a short conversation before they were eatin by a fat kid

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Did you hear about Osama Bin Laden? He's dead.

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What did the Dildo say to the banana? Nothing, unless you're high on acid.

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Your mother is so fat, that making fun if her is a terrible thing to do.

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What time is it? 2:47 PM.

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hi

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I walk the path less taken. Moral: Everything in life is a moral, as far as I care immorality does not exist, everything goes, I AM MORAL MAN!! He`s the MORAL MAN IIS HEE A MORAAL OR IS HEE... (you know Ozzy) AND NOW THAT YOU ARE DOMINATED you can go back to your fun, or reply, again, but you see, at this point I am already elswhere, so if you reply, you lose your control of your nasal coughanalcough nerve endings, and the potency of course.

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What's 13 inches long and 3 inches wide and drives women crazy? My diick

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What is worse than a bee sting? Two bee stings.

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Why did the bald man lose his hair no not cancer obviously AIDS.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Chrome won't stop crashing randomly F*ck Chrome

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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