What's worse than an earthquake? Two earthquakes. What's worse than two earthquakes? Three earthquakes. What's worse than three earthquakes? The world exploding.

My grandmother just called to tell me she was dying................. to have sex with me.

Why did the girl fall off the swing? she had no arms Knock Knock Who's There not the girl

I like my coffee like i like my women, blonde with big boobs.

What did the pirate say to the ninja? I have aids.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have Parkinsons, ;oshgfs;jgbRHG

A young baby died.

Roses are red Violets are blue Why do the following sentences never have anything to do with the roses and violets?

why did the chicken cross the road? Because there were no traffic.

A nun, a jew, and a black walk into a bar. The bartender says "What is this, a joke?"

Jimmy: Knock Knock Nick: Whose there? Jimmy: Joe Nick: Joe Who? Jimmy: Joe Mamma Nick: No shes dead.

What did the depressed teenage fat kid do to resolve his issues? Commited suicide.

Hey Shea

what is the difference betweeb 69 and 77? 8

Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding a baby in your closet.

Why did the plane crash? Because something was wrong with the engine

A black guy and a Mexican are in a car, who's driving? The taxi driver.

roses are red, violets are blue, {insert name here} is f**ked up, (s)he want to have sex with you

Have you ever had Ugandan food? Neither have they.

A 21 year old man walks into a bar. After looking at the menu for a minute he orders the cocktail of the day. The bartender looks at the man in disbelief because he has such a baby face and looks like a teenage kid. The bartender politely asks to see his ID. The man pulls out his wallet and shows him his drivers license. Sure enough he was the legal age of drinking. The bartender says "Thank you" and gives him his beverage.

What kind of mother doesn't do laundry? A dead one.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Scientists are still unable to fully understand the brain functioning of chickens enough to comprehend their motives for doing such a thing.

Why did the black man cross the road? He was chasing the chicken so he could fry it.

How come Susie fell off of the swing? -because I hit her with an axe Coolhsoj

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...