What do you call a black man who flys an airplane? A Pilot

Whats worse then walking into a door? getting shot in the head by a 10ft squirrel holding 44.magnum and a slice of cheese in the other

What does a penguin and a watermelon have in common? They all come from Earth.

What did the Golden Retriever say when asked about the meaning of life? woof.

Q:What happened to the fat man that rode a roller coaster? A:He had fun

“DTF”? Says Will. “No” says Harper.

Knock Knock. Who's there? Dementia.

Why did the man cross the road? Because the light was red!

Why did grandpa fall asleep naked on a bench? Because his mental condition is slowly deteriorating which is causing him to not be able to properly determine what is and isn't ok to do in public.

What do you call an art history major with a job? A gainfully employed member of society, who assuredly benefited from his access to higher education (and quite possibly from acquaintances or family members within the company that employs him, though it is often considered impolite to mention this latter fact, as it may be construed to denigrate the aforementioned individual or his chosen field of study).

Patient: Doctor, I was cleaning my glass eye and accidentally swallowed it. Doctor: OK. Lean over and spread your legs. Patient: (Leans over and spreads his legs). Doctor: My God! This is the first time, in all my years of practice, that I've ever seen an asshole looking back at me

Question: What is worse then a worm in your apple? Answer: A number of different things I would imagine...

What's the difference between an Elephant and a Post Box? An Elephant is not a Post Box. It is an Elephant.

How can you tell if an elepant has been in your refrigerator? It has been destroyed.

What's silent but deadly? A baby falling from a 10 story building

Did you hear phonsi was Gay? I just found out too, he walked into the diner and said, "ive got AAIIIIIDS."

Your mom is so dirty, She smells.

Whats really down a black hole? I don't know...The last person to go down one never came back because he died of AIDS.

why did the black go to the KFC because he likes fried chicken

Why did the baby cross the road? Because he was stapled to the chicken.

women rights

9 + 10 = How much yo mama makes.

It's raining, its pouring, the old man is snoring. He bumps his head, and is quickly rushed to the ER for serious head trauma

A man walks into a bar, he realizes he has no money and leaves

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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