Why do midgets laugh when they run? The grass tickles their balls.

Why can't Molly ride her bike? Because she has no arms or legs. Knock Knock Who's there? Not Molly.

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? "I have a gambling problem."

What did the homeless man get for his 34th birthday? 34 years of regret.

Why did the baby cross the road? It was stapled to the chicken.

What did the chicken say when it finally crossed the road? - nothing, its a chicken

What did the kid with no arms or legs get for Christmas? Cancer.

How many kids with ADHD does it take to change a lightbulb? I dont know lets go play on our bikes.

What has two legs, but can't walk? Half a dog.

Why didnt the chicken cross the road? He was chicken.

Lollies are sweet warheads are sour, open your legs and feel my power

An Irishman walked into a bar, except he would call it a pub, because there are slight differences in vocabulary in different regions, 37 minutes later he walked home safely, fed his cat, read some pages of a book he had been reading, turned the light off and went to bed.

guess what? i dont know, what? i dont know either, i thought you knew.

Q: Why did the black man drown? A: Because he couldn't swim.

Your mom is so black, i shot a bullet at her. It came back and said i need a flashlight.

Bob: I have a funny knock knock joke, but you have to start it. Joe: Ok. Knock Knock. Bob: Who's there? Joe: Uhhhhhhh Bob: Exactly.

A man walks into a bar He orders a beer, drinks the beer, then leaves.

Why's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? Biting into a worm and finding a golden ticket

What is the answer to life, universe and everything? Nothing.

Two guys walk into A bar. The third one ducks.

Q: What do you call a colour blind person that smells like green paint? A: A painter

A plane carrying an Englishman, an Irishman, and a Scotsman is destined to crash unless some weight is lost. First they drop the spare engine, but there is still too much weight. Then they drop the luggage, but still there is too much weight. All three men then jump out. The plane crashes anyway.

If life's a box of chocolates, I'm the dominant male.

Yo mama's so fat, she died of a mixture of obesity and type 1 diabetes.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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