What's white and looks like paper? Paper

A man walked into a bar. He sat down, had a nice meal and went home relatively satisfied.

I got 99 problems and they're all related to long history of drug abuse

What's long and blackand goes all night? night time

Then I contracted bronchitis from the smoke. Unfortunately I don't not have time to visit a doctor to mend this debilitation. In fact, nobody does.

What did the construction worker bring with him to work? - Tools

A blonde, a brunette and a red head are having a discussion on current issues. The brunette says she would like to see improvements in the environment. The red head says she would like to see the economy prosper. The blonde says she has to take a poop.

How many mice does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Just two, the mystery is how mice can get inside a lightbulb.

Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the second squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the first one. Why did the third squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it thought it was a game. Why did the tree fall over? Because it thought it was a squirrel.

what is the difference between a baby and a book... The book still has a spine

What's the difference between a grape and a duck? They're both purple, apart from the duck.

A bison trots into a bar. The bartender says, "My pee makes bubbles in the toilet." Amazed by the urination fact, the bison explodes.

roses are grey violets are grey im a dog

Like is like a penis long and easy. But women make it hard

Identical jokes get different amounts of votes

Don't you hate it when someone starts a sentence and doesnt fi...

Why did Mary fall off the swings? Because she had no arms. Knock Knock, Whos there, Not Mary

Whats green and miss centowski hates a gas chamber :D lets be friends

Q: Why did Sally keep falling off the swing? A: She had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

Why did Michael Jackson get so many nose jobs? He was incredibly insecure.

your mother is so fat that she probably watches her calorie intake every day

How do you get a black man out of your seat? You ask him very nicely with a great attitude.

SPILL THE BEAAAANNSSSS

Want a fight? You Spelt F**K wrong O.o

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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