Q. How many men did it take to build a wall? A. None, the wall is already built.

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What do you call a big group of Chinese people on Mars? An extraordinary feat for the Chinese space program and a historic day in human history, where a particular country has set up the first human colony on another planet and we have proven to ourselves that our race is capable of interplanetary travel and can accomplish anything if we set our minds to it.

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What did the rapist say to the child? Contrary to popular belief, I am just a kind old man that likes to hand out sweets to disadvantaged young children. I only got dubbed a rapist when a child crawled into the back of my van as I drove off; the fact that his abusive father was the one who raped him is not my fault.

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how many licks does it take to get to the tootsie roll center of a tootsie pop? Not enough

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what starts with b and ends with b? The bomb i just planted in your house.

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What do you get when you cross a dog with an anteater? An animal unlikely to survive beyond infancy.

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What's the only thing better than winning a gold medal in the special olympics? Not being retarded.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? The Columbine Massacre

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whats better than nailing a baby to a wall? Ripping it off the wall.

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So Nero, do we tell people your comments are all containing codes and stuff so we can stay in touch?

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What's worse than a dead baby? Two dead babies.

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Why did the Mexican mow the lawn? He needed money to feed his family and to pay for his daughter's college education.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Me ill kill u,

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Why did t chicken cross the road? To get to your house. Knock, knock. Who's there? The chicken

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What goes up a hill with four legs and comes down the hill with five? A creepy animal that grows legs when it goes down hills.

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Q: What is red and smells like blue paint? A: Green paint.

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Why did Jimmy fall off the swing? He had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Certainly not Jimmy.

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If life hands you melons you might be dyslexic

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A morbidly overweight baby eats horse poop and dies a slow horrible death

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How do you cure a person that claims cannot say no to anything? Treatment: *locks door* NOW SAY NO TO ME! BUAHAHAHAHA! Patient: NO I CANT!!! You care cured! *opens door* NEXT!

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The song Barbra Streisand has more than 2 words.

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What did the frat guy drink after he lifted? A various assortment of beverages that were chilled at a cool 66 degrees.

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Why did jasmine drop her shopping? And no its not because she did'nt have arms infact she did have arms she just did'nt have any hands

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what can't see and has four eyes? a blind kid born with four eyes

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops