what did the woman say when the guy told her he liked her christmas tree? thank you.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

An ant tries to climb and sit on a tube. It couldn't. Do you get it? … I don't either.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

A guy walks into a bar. The bartender says "Why the long face?" The guy didn't respond because he was deaf.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

what do you say when your phone is broken? A: my phone is broken

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What Did Gretel say to Hansel? Stop having sex with Ariana Grande!

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Dey see me boilin' Dey choppin' God I'm so fresh and juicy So fresh and juicy So fresh and juicy So fresh and juiiiiiiccccy! MR MCCANN

thumb_up thumb_down -9

you know why Michael J Fox makes the best milkshakes? no... but his milkshakes brings all the boys to the yard

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What do you call cheese that isn't yours? Mine.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What time is it? It depends in your location and time zone

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Why did Sally fly off the swing, She had no arms Knock knock *Who's there* Not Sally

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Where was Suzy during the explosion? Everywhere! Knock Knock! Who's there? Not Suzy!

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What do you call the man with no arms or legs, swimming in the bay? Bob.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

You walk into a plane full of Arabs talking about how much they hate America. You arrive at your destination enlightened about the problems in American society.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Gus's mom

thumb_up thumb_down -9

how come jenny could not fall asleep? their was a man standing outside her window holding a knife

thumb_up thumb_down -9

1:Your reading my text. 2:Your wondering what the point is. 3:Your getting angry. 5:Your going to click thumbs down. 6:But wait! You didn't realize that there was no number 4. 7:Your checking it. 9:Your smiling. 10:Your smiling so much you forgot to check for number 8. 11:Your checking it. 12:Jokes on you.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Knock knock Who's there? Nobody Oh, ok

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Roses are red Violets are blue You're a whore

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What do you call a purple apple? Bruised.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Romney: I think you would raise our debt and make more Americans jobless. Obama: It's just cuz I'm black!

thumb_up thumb_down -9

How do you fix a chimpanzee? With a monkey wrench

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Three men walk in to a bar, One ducked

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? This site.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops