why did the chicken cross the road? he was an escaped mental paitent

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Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? Because she was deaf, dumb, and blind.

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But there's a sound Dumbledore knows... What does the Fawkes say?

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What do you get if you put a baby in a blender? An Erection

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Knock knock. Who's there? Josh. Lettuce who? I didn't say "lettuce"... I said Josh.

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Why did the black man commit suicide? Because he was killed by a white cop.

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Yo momma's so skinny she doesn't have any fat!

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autistic kids rock

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a horse walks into a bar. Noticing the potentially dangerous situation everyone leaves, the bartender calls RSPCA who come and retrieve the horse and order is restored.

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Do you believe in magic? cuz i do.

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What did the homosexual farmer say when he answered the phone? Hello

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What do you call a bunch of Cubans on a boat in the Gulf of Mexico? A guy who just so happens to own a boat and is on a fishing trip with his buddies. -Mitch Hastings

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How do you poop without it splashing? clench clench, release, clench clench, release, clench, release, clench, release.

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What did the man with no head get for Christmas? Nothing he was dead

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My friends all use twitter but i dont know how to use it, so i said i will carry a megaphone around saying what i am doing at random times. Like yesterday i was in the library so i said into my megaphone "i am in the library" Yay i got 3 new followers, 2 of them were cops. Jokes From Blox Computers Corporation [Thailand] Bellow Joke In Thai: ?????? Twitter ???????????????? ??????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????? ? ???????????????????????????? ???????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????? "i am ??????????" ??????????????? 3, 2 ????????????????????

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor Wheres my tractor?

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I am pleased and honored to hear you speak that beautifully straight from your heart Nero, you are without equal, unmatched. And he who is unmatched, also stands alone.

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What's worse than farting in front of your boyfriend? Farting on your boyfriends pillow and giving him pink eye.

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whate white and cant climb trees? powdered sugar

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What's blue, orange, and silver all over? Nothing. That's a ridiculous combination of colors.

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Why did the legless person roll down a hill? Because he was in a wheelchair

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A vulture gets on a transatlantic flight with a dead animal in each claw. The flight attendant stops him, and says "I'm sorry, sir, only one piece of carrion per passenger allowed"

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What is yellow, has wheels and lies on its back? A school bus after a horrible traffic accident

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What's the difference between scrambled eggs and scrambled dead babies? I don't like scrambled eggs..

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops