Knock knock Who's there? Fuk Fuk who?

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What's the difference between a book and a house? Their names

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Why was the boy scared? Well, his mother had recently taken up Satanical ideals and in an attempt to sacrifice themselves to the Dark Lord, she drove her car off a cliff and into a lake. Now, with his dead mother in the drivers seat, no way to call emergency services, and 300 feet of water between him and the surface, you can see why he'd be scared.

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Roses are red So are you Cause you killed my dreams So I killed you

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You can pick your ur nose u can pick ur friends u just can't pick ur friends nose.

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What do you call a cat at the bottom of the ocean? A cat.

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What do you call a midget driving a train? A conductor

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A jew walk's into a bar. But actually it was a Gas chamber.

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A black man and a mexican man are in a car. Who is driving? The cop. The two men were best friends who had taken a month off from working in their law firm. The mexican man, Alex, had recently gone through a divorce and John decided to take him on a trip backpacking across Europe. Rain had suddenly come upon them and a passing off-duty police officer had picked them up and took them to a nearby hotel. The three men had drinks and the friends had a wonderful rest of their trip. Alex, however never got over Jenny leaving him. 3 months after their return John found him dead in his home by auto-erotic asphyxiation.

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A thought for the day: Life is like a game of chess. In the constant struggle for power, control and safe positions it makes no difference whether one plays white or black. As long as everything is planned and one stays a few moves ahead, everything will work out. Just don't annoy the queen, or she may send some very irate knights to fork you or a bishop to flank you. [L]

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why did the bear fall out of the tree? He died. Why did the raccoon fall out of the tree? He was stapled to the bear.

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Do you want to hear a joke?!?!?!?!?!?! A happy orphan

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Why did Paul let Johnny choke to death? Because Paul had no arms.

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Why did the black man fall down the stairs? Because he was blind

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What is brown and sticky?… A shit…

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Neither have I

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A man invites his Irish friend to his house. "Would you like something to drink?" the man asks. "Just kidding, we don't have any drinks." Later, they die of dehydration.

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What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in a pool? Phil, because that's his name.

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Why did the boy fall off the swing? Because it broke...

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Faith, Family, Friends, those are three words.

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What's the difference between and orange? The horse wasn't wearing a saddle.

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What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? Biting into a worm and finding an apple

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a. why? b. because I wanted

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What do you call a black teen on Maury Povich? A mother.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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