This is my favorite antijoke.

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OK, Billy went to his friend Fred in the tree. And then went inside to get a snack. Then Fred fell out of the Tree and.....landed on a comfy mattress.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's dead.

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A dog walks into a bar Because the door was open -Tag

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What is long and painful? It's a sword, get your mind out of the gutter.

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I've always hated people saying "last one there is a rotten egg" because don't you want to be a rotten egg so you don't get eaten?

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Why can't Larry drive? Because he doesn't have his license, and his temps expired!

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A man walks into a bar. On the way home, he is driving, careers off the road and crashes. Lesson here. Don't walk into poles

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why did the kitten drink its milk? because it doesnt have a motor so has no need for petrol.

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why was the postman sad? because ran over a small child with his truck

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give a man a blow job and he'll come for a second. teach a man to blow job and .... no that just doesn't work

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A Finnish guy and a Russian guy go into a sauna. The Russian died.

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It's not gay until eyes meet or tips touch.

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Wanna here a funny joke... Trevor michael dyess's social life.

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The New York Giants

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What is the difference between a calendar and you? A calendar has dates!!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To rape a duck

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How do you stop an aboriginal from drowning? Take your foot off his head...

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Q:What did the frog say to the mailman? A:Nothing theres no mail on Sunday's.

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A man walks into a bar, He is a severe alcoholic and is slowly drowning himself in booze. The man exits the bar after several hours of heavy drinking and walks home. He enters his home to discover a man in bed with his wife. After the first ten seconds of paralyzing rage, he grabs a .44 Magnum and brutally murders his wife and her bed mate. The man realizes he has woken up his two month old, and after thinking of the horrible act he has committed, he promptly raises the pistol to his temple and pulls the trigger. Oh, I almost forgot, the man was schizophrenic and has never been married.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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mario squashes another goomba when his wife hears of this he kills her 3 children with a gun and hangs herself.

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What did the blind man say to his best friend? All i see is darkness and i want to end my life

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Why did the boy fail his test? Because he got shot before he could even study.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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