What does a lonely man do on opposite day? I don't know. Why should we know what he does, that is both weird and illegal. Stalking is a serious crime and should not be used. We do not know what he does on normal days, thus we cannot come to a conclusion to this question. However, I do hypothesize that he must be social on this day because this is the opposite of lonely.

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A horse walks into a bar, and the bartender says "Why the long face?" And the horse says "I have cancer".

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A jew walk's into a bar. But actually it was a Gas chamber.

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No soup for you!

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? One is a human being belonging to a particular religious minority and the other is a delicious Italian food favoured by English speaking western cultures. The problem with this anti-joke is that the facts are not correct, pizza was originally invented and China; however,it looked quite different then what might be considered pizza by our standards, when pizza was brought to Italy it was improved to make what we now consider pizza in modern times. While some people may consider pizza an Italian food, this would be failing to give credit to the Chinese who invented it.

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Did you hear about the man who played the lottery? He lost.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Being a chicken, it had no concept of roads or their dangers and was simply trying to find some feed.

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Whats white and sticky? Glue.

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Q; why did the German ask the Jew to go in his shower? A; because the Jew had stayed the night at the Germans house.

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Knock Knock. Doors open

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A blonde, a brunette, and a red head walk into a bar. You think they should have ducked?

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How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family

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What's red and can sing? Elmo

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Wow you look beautiful in that picture..... Let me see your tits. Sorry, I thought I was still texting.

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A muslim walks out of a plane.

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roses are red violets are blue i have Alzheimer whats a rose?

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- Why does a kid from Chernobyl have two heads? - Because of the effects of the nuclear disaster that occurred there in 1986.

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A friend of mine said; the only vegetables that makes you cry are oignons. that was before I hit him with a watermelon

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What is brown and sticky?… A shit…

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Why did Little Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms.

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My Jimmy Saville advent calendar is rubbish. It only opens from 1 to 16.

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What did the cat say when it was hungry? Meow.

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What long black and tasty? Licorice

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What is the difference between a black man and a bench? The bench is a piece of wood, while the black man is a human being.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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