Whats the difference between an apple and a chicken? Many, many things

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What happens when you give a fat man scissors? He cuts off the foreskin of your penis.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to your house... Knock, knock Who's there? The chicken.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What did the kid with no legs get for Christmas? A new pair of shoes

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What's wore then finding a worm in your apple? Being the only person to survive a plane crash over Alaska, then having to eat your family in order to stay alive waiting for help to come.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

A bison trots into a bar. The bartender says, "My pee makes bubbles in the toilet." Amazed by the urination fact, the bison explodes.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

knock knock whos there the game __i lost the game__

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What happens to a blonde girl who is buying drugs off of a drug dealer? Nothing, she was an undercover police officer trying to arrest said drug dealers on the street.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Q: Why do blondes wear hoop earrings? A: Those that wear them think that said earrings positively accentuate their physical appearance.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

quantum physics?

thumb_up thumb_down +1

If you eat a brussel sprouts-and-ketchup sundae, your tastebuds will likely turn purple and move to France, where people don't eat brussel sprouts-and-ketchup sundaes.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Ask me if I care. Do you care? No.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why did the black guy lose the race? He toke an arrow to the knee

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why was the man worried? because he had a shotgun up his ass

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What do you get when you mix a turtle and a dog An animal

thumb_up thumb_down +1

When I die, I want to die like my grandfather who died peacefully in his sleep. Not screaming like all the passengers in his car.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was dead

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What's the best part of the 1980s? They're over.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Your mother is so fat, that making fun if her is a terrible thing to do.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Friends are a lot like trees They fall down when you hit them multiple times with an axe

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Roses are red, violets blue, um... that's all i got.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Roses are red and so is venus now kneel down and suck my penis:)

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding a worm in your penis.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops