A girl is talking with her boyfriend - God, you're selfish!!! - No, i sell meat.

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What's the difference in an orange? A chicken because a vest has no sleeves.

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Knock, knock Who's there? It's me Me who? Just open your damn door funny guy it's freezing out here

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Why doesnt Squidward wear pants? Because he likes to hang loose

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Q.sam is 18 years old, why can't she get her licence? A.because Sam is a lost dog on the street

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Light travels faster than sound, thats why people look smart until they talk.

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Why did the girl cry when her boyfriend brought up the topic about rape? Because she was raped by her father as a child and it was a suppressed memory.

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What do you call a deer with no eye? No eye deer ( get it, it's like the red, necked southern speaking states )

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What's the difference between Tiger Woods and Santa? Tiger woods is a famous golf player and Santa is a fictional old man dressed in red and white who is said to live in Lapland, have an airborne sleigh driven by eight magical reindeer and come down the chimney to fill childrens' stockings on Christmas eve.

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Wanna know what a hate about instructions? I always get my dick stuck in a ceiling fan.

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Why did the serial killer need the knife? He needed to butter his bread

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Yo momma so ugly..... what more do you want

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What do you call a boy with no arms and no legs waterskiing? Skip

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A muslim, a jew, and a black man jump off a cliff. Who hits the ground first? They all hit the ground at the same time because gravity pulls all objects at the same rate regardless of their mass.

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where does al queda go on a business trip the twin towers

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Knock Knock Come in

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I was expecting something like that... Anyway, good you do not mind in particular, because that means I am just boring myself here, so, tell me something about yourself you don't tell people most.

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Why did the man punch NUGE in the face? Because he got angry that NUGE was being such a BA person and he was jealous of NUGE'S style and he just got dumped by his ugly as poop mom which was eating Anti Chicken.

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Why did the boy get hit by a bus? HE didn't. He watched where he was going.

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What is worse that a bee sting? 2 bee stings what is worse that 2 bee sting? Kony what is wose than Kony? 3 bee stings what is worse than 3 bee sting? being allergic to bee stings

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You're walking down a street and you see a man struggling to open a door, what do you do? Whatever you feel like doing.

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knock knock who's there? F uck F uck who? F uck off

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Michael walked into a bar, The rest of the bar initially erupted with laughter until the his carer made everybody aware that Michael suffered from brittle bones and that he had actually fractured his hip after colliding with the bar. People then understood the gravity situation as the bartender immediately dialled the emergency services. Michael managed to recover physically from the accident but to this day he is still scarred from the laughter aimed at him the night of his accident and is too afraid to return to the bar again in fear of being mocked despite the misunderstanding of the situation.

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News of the day - David gives back 2 pounds to someone. The police, as he stole from a old nana to pay for a toothbrush

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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