How many licks does it take to get to the center of a Tootsie Pop? Go ask your mom.

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Dylan F is stupid He goes to his cousins house Then falls into a pit Moves on

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whats brown and sticky? Doody

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why did the monkey fall out of the tree? because it was dead.

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What did the archangel Michael say to Jesus? "Hello, Jesus."

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Whats worse than finding half a worm in your apple? Finding out that that apple was the tip of a dick

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Roses are red, violets are blue, your face is so ugly it belongs in a zoo, but dont be sad, i forgot the rest, so you wont feel really bad. I need a rhyme, treasure chest.

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What happened to the pig? It got turned into bacon like every other pig.

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Did you see Helen Keller's doll house? No... Well it's really nice!

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What happens when a black man is swinging in a tree? He is enjoying the swing set I helped his father put up.

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why did the students in 7/8 red try to commit suicide? they had miss harding as a teacher!

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you know why they're called ear wigs, right? cause they go in your ears! then they wig out? no, they kill you.

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In other news, a Florida man was arrested today for stealing candy...with a knife.

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on a planet, in a galaxy, far far away... you have cancer

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How did bill lose his legs he got them amputated after contracting a severe case of "INeedToGetMyLegsAmputatedSyndrome"

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What do you call a bunch of Cubans on a boat in the Gulf of Mexico? A guy who just so happens to own a boat and is on a fishing trip with his buddies. -Mitch Hastings

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A man calls his 23 year old nephew on a Saturday night. He's calling him, in order to apologise for molesting him when he was younger. As he could no longer live with the guilt and shame. They both start to cry on the phone. The nephew hangs up " I can't do this.." The man receives an email from his boss, saying " Lisa told me she's still waiting for your analysis on the new federal cuts and how they're going to affect us. Please send them asap."

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Why did the boy jump off the building? To get to the bottom.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Tulips can be of multiple colors.

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I love this website, oh shit *Car* Dead*

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What is worse than stepping on Lego bare foot? Mass genocide.

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why did the small boy drop his ice cream ? because he has no hands

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Why did Schrödinger's Cat cross the road? It didn't

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Do you believe in magic? cuz i do.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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