Q: What did the two muffins say in the oven? A: OMG we are in an oven, "OMG a talking muffin"

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What did the elephant say to the other elephant? Nothing. -Albert Einstein... LOL JOKES my name is PJ.

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what do you call a clown in makeup? a clown, clowns are supposed to wear makeup.

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Yo mama's chest is so flat that it's because she has stage five breast cancer and had to get both her breasts removed.

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What do you call a man with a limp? A limping man.

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Knock Knock Who's there? You have AIDS.

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What did the cop say to the speeding black man? "Can I see your license and registration?"

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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An American, a Canadian, an Afro-American and a Jew walk in a bar. They all order their favorite drink and go look for potential partners with whom they'd wish to engage in sexual relationships.

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Three men are walking, the first one walks into a bar. He has a couple of drinks because he is depressed. He drives home, drunk, and dies in a car accident. His wife finds out and hangs herself.

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Two guys walk into a bar together. They are diagnosed with a concussion and later on in life have serious brain issues

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What did Oprah get for christmas? Weight Watchers

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What do black people and bananas have in common? 50% of their DNA

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What can a Giraffe have, that no other animal on Earth can? A baby Giraffe.

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My wife is so fat that I find her unattractive.

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Knock knock Whos there? Knock knock Who's there? Knock knock Who's there?! "is anyone home this is Helan Keller"

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Why cant the asian find his family? His eyes were too squinty

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a cat and a duck walk into a pub. the cat enters first and says for the duck to put all of their drinks on his bill. the duck(being a duck)says nothing because ducks cannot speak. therefore the cat shouldnt have been speaking either.

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A baby seal walks into a club. The man holding the club skins him and makes a lot of money.

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What happened when Glen jumped off a building? The rope snapped his neck. He died.

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What do you get when you mix a refrigerator with a microwave? A refrigerated microwave.

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a guy walked into a bar, ordered a drink, sipped it slowly thinking of his waisted youth. then he finished his drink and went home to his wife of 34 years

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how do you call someone? use a phone

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Whats 2 Plus 2? God Just Solve It.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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