Want to hear a joke? Too bad.

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What Did The Ocean Say To The Other Ocean? What? Nothing, They Just Waved. Oh. Did You Sea What I Did There? No. I'm Shore You Did.

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What is black white and red all over? A zebra which a lion did not finish eating.

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How do you know when you have had too much to drink? When you ran over 7 pedestrians and are lying in the back of a police vehicle

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Why did grandpa fall asleep naked on a bench? Because his mental condition is slowly deteriorating which is causing him to not be able to properly determine what is and isn't ok to do in public.

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How does a dyslexic person read the word 'schitzophrenia'? Schitzophrenia. I leid abuot teh dyslxeia.

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What does AIDS smell like? AIDS has no smell. AIDS is a diease contracted though sexual contact with another being with the diease. It greatly increases the risk of infections and malignancy. Although AIDS has no smell, in the final stages large sores develope on the surface of the skin. This means you are going to die. Thus, HIV/AIDS has no smell.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It died.

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What's worse than the holocaust? Finding a worm in your apple.

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What do you call a black woman that's blind and has 1 leg? Handicapped

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How many licks did it take for the owl to get to the center of the tootsie roll tootsie pop? A: Since when did owls have tounges?

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Once there was this duck. he was the best dentist in the world...

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Why did th chicken cross the road? To get to the other side. Why did the cupboard cross the road? It was stapled to the chicken.

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Haikus usually make sense, but sometimes they don't refrigerator.

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Why is 6 afraid of 7? 7 is a terrorist.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Daisy's are white, Metallica.

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what's wose than finding a holocaust in your anti-joke? the potential offspring of courtney love and al gore

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What is yellow and dangerous? Shark infested butter

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-I have an idea! Let's play twenty questions! -Alright! But i have to warn u I have piss running down my leg

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How did the dead baby cross the road? It was stapled to the leg of a chicken.

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How High is a Chinese man

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Whats worse than a truck full of dead babies? A live baby trying to eat his way out.

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An Irishman walks into a bar he asks for directions, and leaves.

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Why is Megan Fox so hot? Because the air conditioning broke.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops