there's a new drink out called the Bin Laden... it consists of two shots and a splash of water

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Sooo, when exactly did you become a man? Is this subject boring you?

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Roses are red My balls are blue Get off Unless You want too

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I used to be an adventurer like you, until old age slowly took away my ability to move and go adventuring

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What starts with 'd' and ends in 'ick'? dick -XH

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Your mom is so fat that she has diabetes and if she does not stick to her medical diet, her foot will be removed, but she started binge eating because of you in the first place, and if you don't straighten our your life, you will inadvertently be the cause of your mothers death.

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Woah, I mean if I was not like super high right now, I would totally hate you for that, you are what we call a charming asshole Nero, you can do that kinda stuff and completely get away with it, I feel like I should be really ashamed... So like does it work on everybody reading this? That would be wack, so much fun to do that.

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I had an amnesia joke But it was written down on a slip of paper because someone else wrote it down. Let me just take it out & read it to you

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How do you stop a black kid from hanging around in your back yard? Hang him in the front yard.

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An american, canadian, and mexican are on a skyscraper. Canadian: (pulls off maple leaf) we have to many of these in our country (throws off building) Mexican: (pulls out burrito) we have to many of these in our country (throws off building) American: (looks at mexican) we have to many of these in our country (pushes mexican off building)

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KNOCK KNOCK. WHO'S THERE? BOO. OH, HEY. COME IN. ....

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What's the difference between a Obama and a drug-dealer? Obama is the president and a drug-dealer has lost his life to the awful streets.

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What did one muffin say to the other muffin? Oh my gosh a talking muffin.

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Why did the cow cross the road? The slaughter yard was on the other side!

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50 gay man and a homophobe are in a nightclub in Florida ...you know how the rest goes.

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Q: What's worse than a paper cut? A: 9/11

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Harry thrust his wand forward, "Expelliarmus!" Voldemort casually ducks, and fires a killing curse at our hero.

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Your mom is so retard that she needs "special help" from medical professionals. :3 <33

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What did one cow say to the other cow? Moo

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Roses are brown Violets are brown Who pooped in my garden?

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So my friend told me to go shot myself I got my Canon and shoot myself The image came out very clean and profession.

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Two fuses wearing bombs for hats were sitting on a bench with their frayed feet dangling on the ground. A match was walking along and tripped, hitting it's head on the ground and bursting into flame. Luckily the fuses had finished lunch by that time and gone back to work. Unluckily for the match it died from burns to 80 percent of it's body.

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Why did Larry fall off his bike? He was hit in the head with a brick...

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What's the difference between a baby and a watermelon? One's fun to smash with a hammer and the other one is a watermelon.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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