What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? nothing he was Jewish

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Big feet on a man means he has, Nothing, a man's foot size has no relation to the size of his penis.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What do Selena and Justin, Kate and William, and Barack and Michelle all have in common? Nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What's the difference between a grape and a duck? They're both purple, apart from the duck.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Knock Knock? Who's There? Sgt Constable Ian. Sgt Constable Ian Who? It's Sgt Constable Ian - I'm here to see you about your alleged rape charges.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What did the jewish man say to the Irish guy at the bar? Are you Irish?

thumb_up thumb_down +4

How many kids with ADHD does it take to change a lightbulb? I dont know lets go play on our bikes.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

what happens when an Asian and a Jew get married. They have children.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

your mamas so fat she tried to hang herself but the rope broke.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

If people are freaking out about this Kony guy I cant wiat to see the look on their faces when they check in my crawl space.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

An Irishman walked into a bar, except he would call it a pub, because there are slight differences in vocabulary in different regions, 37 minutes later he walked home safely, fed his cat, read some pages of a book he had been reading, turned the light off and went to bed.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

a man walked into a bar and ordered a beer. The Bartender says okay, here you go.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

A Mexican and a black man are in a car. Who's driving? The black man, because he was the designated driver for the night and was being helped by his good friend, Paco the Mexican, to quit his alcohol addiction. The AA meetings and rehab clininc were failing and he had lost his job. Jamaal, the black man, is now attending night school and holding down a part-time job at his local Baha Fresh. paco is very proud of him.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

why did your mom leave your dad because he was a drunk :l

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Your mom is so black, i shot a bullet at her. It came back and said i need a flashlight.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

roses are blue violets are red crap i screwed up dont judge me

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why did the first Monkey fall out of the tree? He was dead. Why did the second Monkey fall out of the tree? He was stapled to the first Monkey. Why did the bird fall out of the tree? Peer pressure.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What's white and looks like paper? Paper

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What's the cure of cancer? Death.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Don't you just hate it when a sentence doesn't end the way you octopus?

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Yes

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Fenestrade De Riguerto sat aloft his might horse Bentereuse and called for his brigadiers. At home his wife was opening a package. 2 minutes later a sound could be heard reverberating across the countryside. It was the invasion fleet from Denarus V wiping out humanity

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Who is the most vile man in Britain? Jerry Carr, the guy who works at the casino.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Roses are red My name is Dave This poem doesn't make sense Potato

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops