How do you stop the neighbors from calling the police when you play your music too loud? Kill them and use their bodies as noise insulation

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Whats the difference between platinum blondes? Absolutley nothing they all look exactly the same.

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This site is called anti-joke.com Because it is a donkey.

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms. Why couldn't she get back up? She had no legs.

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A black man checks his watch. He sees that its 3:50, and calmly carries on with his day.

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Why didn't the dog want to cross the road? there was a flea market on the other side.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? AIDS

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How many dead babies can you fit in a child's swimming pool? 9 (Trust me, you won't be able to squeeze the tenth one in there.)

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What do you call a black man flying a plane? A pilot.

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why didn't the unicorn have a horn? It was a horse. Why didn't the horse have a horn? it was not a unicorn.

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What is the difference between a Jew and a pizza? The pizza doesn't scream when it goes into the oven.

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How do u kill a black man You don't or else u will get intouble for murder but u can if u want there r many ways

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okay, there was a donkey and a parrot walking at the park. When it was raining the donkey says to parrot hey why is it so hot. Then a person riding bikes come to the parrot and she told her to sit down. Nobody saying hello but she can dance reallly nicely.

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Hey, why the long face?" The horse replies, "I have cancer."

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How do you get a baby to be quiet? Put it in the oven for a few minutes

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What is the best thing the French ever invent The two piece

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What did the girl tell her abusive boyfriend Girl: You broke my heart! Boyfriend: I'm gonna break your face.

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Man: Excuse me sir, is this where I turn in my library book? Farmer: You must be really lost, this is a farm.

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Evil Witch: Hey Snow White, want an apple. Snow White: No thank you, I just ate, I'm good. Evil Witch: But its good! Snow White: No thanks, I'm good! Evil Witch: Ill put caramel on it!! Snow White: NO THANKS! Evil Witch: FINE!! The Evil Witch then pulled out an AK - 47 and violently murdered Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs.

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I remember my first beer. It did not taste good to me at the time.

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What's blue and looks like water? Yes.

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A Gamer walks into the tavern, the bartender says to him, "just dont act like you control the place!"

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whats worst then dieng in a videogame

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You wanna pop a bottle? I hope you are referring to bottles of water as I am underage and I refuse to partake in any said consumption of alcoholic beverages

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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