What is worse then rain on your wedding day? Getting married.

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Why was Jimmy so upset? Because both of his parents died.

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toby limbers is gonna follow in his uncles footsteps, the gay ones

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Why was the little girl crying? Because she was hanging upside down from an oak tree.

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How many Jews can you fit into a Volkswagen Beatle? Two in the front, two in the back, and one hundred in the ash tray.

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Why was the cookie sad? It had just been eaten and is currently disintegrating in the hydrochloric acid of someones stomach.

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How do you get a blonde's number? You ask her, but she probably won't give it to a loser like you.

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a rabbi and a priest walk into a wall

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Why couldn't the hobo buy any clothes? They did not have his size available.

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Jack and Jill went up the hill, to fetch a pail of water. Jack fell down and broke his crown, and Jill came tumbling after. Up Jack got, and home did trot, as fast as he could caper, to old Dame Dob, who proceeded to get Jill convicted of attempted murder, as well as several millions of dollars for pain and suffering.

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Puns are terrible. I love them.

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A man walked into a bar. He needed 5 stitches.

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Did you hear about the kidnapping in New York? He woke up.

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Why couldn't the boy see the pirate movie? Because it was sold out

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The awkward moment when you are reading these jokes and either it's not funny or you don't get it...

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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What comes after Friday? A ?.

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100% of the people who go to school die. What about the people who don't go to school? They die too.

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Why did I get thumbs up from everyone? Answer: Because they like my anti-joke.

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roses are red violets are blue im not good at poems so fuck you too.

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steve walked into a bar, what happened next? A: He fell down.

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Why did the little boy throw rocks at his sister? ...Because she has cancer.

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What characterizes a good joke? The lack of a punch line.

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Two colleague janitors sit next to each other in the coffee room, one says to the other: About yesterday... I checked three times and it looks pretty normal. Sorry... I wasn't around to hear the question the other posed the day before, but I heard it's supposed to be pretty funny with this answer. So... Less is better then none, right?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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