Q: How many dead babies does it take to fill a mixing bowl? A: There is an infinite amount of answers to this question depending on the sizes and shapes or the dead babies, so lets assume that an average would probably be about 4 babies that dies just as the left the mother.

What's worst than the finding a worm in your apple? The Holocaust. What's worst than the Holocaust? Finding two worms in your apple. What's worst than finding two worms in your apple? Finding seven dead babies in a trash can. What's worst than that? Finding one dead baby in seven trash cans.

Q: What is green, has red shoes, exists in videogames and runs really really fast while collecting rings, running trough loops, has a fox sidekick etc? A: Sonic The Hedgefrog. Moral: I was always a bigger fan of Super Fratelli Brothers though...

How many days can a pelican whisper? Pelicans can't whisper.

Dam. Mothers Against Dyslexia.

Scream went into the bar. The bartender says," Why the long face?" "..." *facepalm*

What did the cat say to the rabbit? Nothing, cats are incapable of human speech as far as scientists are concerned. Also, the mouse was having a bad day. Rutabaga.

Is this your pen? I wanna go to school, bye!

You know what's funnier than 24? .... 9-11

God hates fags, no...god i'snt real

Pickup line: Hey babe, do you work at Mcdonalds? Because I don't have a job, are you hiring?

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Why did Samuel drive his car into a tree? Because the tree was being a total jerk, blocking the road.

Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

What do you call a man with a horse? A man

H2O corndogs running around naked CC

Jerry Sandusky walks into an Under 21

what do you get a man with no arms or legs for his birthday? a quick, painless death.

Q: What did the two muffins say in the oven? A: OMG we are in an oven, "OMG a talking muffin"

Why did the chicken cross the road? If you don't know the answer by now, there's something wrong with you.

How do you drown a blonde? Put a scratch and sniff sticker at the bottom of the pool then don't let her come up for air.

what's worse then the holocaust finding a worm in your apple.

A person was born on may 5th 1955 and one day noticed that they had $555.55 in their bank account. The person went to a race and betted all their money on the 5th runner in the 5th race. What happened? The runner came in 5th place.

Mom now that I am fourteen can I get a bra now? No Harold!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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