What's yellow and can't swim? A bulldozer.

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Why was the little boy hit by a bus? I pushed him

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When is a door not a door? When it is ajar.

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What do you call a man with no eyes? A hero for going to war and surviving being tortured by the Vietnamese.

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what happened to the girl next door ? she was brutally murdered.

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A Mexican guy, a black guy, and an ISIS member walk into a bar. The black and Mexican men, realizing the potential danger in the situation quickly exit the bar and alert the proper authorities. $

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Q: Why did the boy fall off his bicycle? A: Because someone threw a fridge at him.

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What is an offensive way to refer to black people from the time of the Flint Stones? Niggers

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Why was the white man chosen for the job over the black guy? He had more work experience and was clearly the better suited applicant.

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Q:What did the homeless guy say to the business man on the cell phone A: Nothing because he doesn't want to disturb his phone call

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Two elves walk into a bar. The hobbit laughs and walks under it.

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Whats Brown, Long and is on every black man? Legs

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yo momma so fat... she went on a calorie controlled diet and lost 3 stone, she's a really nice lady too.

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what did the red towel and the blue towel say? Nothing because towels are inanimate objects and therefore can't talk.

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What did the snowman say to the other snowman? Do you smell carrots?

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I cant believe they been together after all that shit. (person ask what) and you say your buttchheeeeks:]

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How many straight naked men can you fit in a wardrobe? I'm not sure but the situation is highly unlikely!

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Why did hundreds ofnpeople die in a plane crash? Because the pilot was a salad.

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There once was a mam from Peru He dreamed he was eating a shoe It wasn't... It was a goat

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it looking for food for it was starving to death.

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Why couldn't the man sleep? Because he was a wax model in a museum, and as we all know wax models are inanimate objects thus incapable of consciousness and therefore incapable of unconsciousness as well. Many other inanimate objects are caught up in similar problems relating to their incapability to do anything.

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A grasshopper walks into a bar, the bartender says, "We have a drink named after you", the grasshopper replies, "you have a drink named Bob"

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i should have been sad when my flashlight died.... but i was delighted.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Repeated jokes.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops