Why do asians get good grades? Because they study very hard and want to achieve success so they can provide for their families.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Patient- Doctor! I feel like a piece of ****! Doctor- What is ****? Patient- It's four dots on the computer screen representing a curse word. Doctor- What computer screen?

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Hello, my name is John, and you are reading this paragraph. Find the mistake...

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What did Joe get for his first birthday? Nothing he died at birth

thumb_up thumb_down -9

John's life hasn't been the same since committing suicide 13 years ago.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What's the difference between a Jew and a Fire extinguisher? One puts out a fire the other one fuels it.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Why was Jimmy sad he couldn't play the Playstation? He didnt have one

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What goes up a hill with 4 legs and comes down with 3? A horse, which, upon reaching the top of the hill, has one of its legs chopped off, which is when the horse proceeds down the hill.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Once there was an egg by the name of Steve. His name was Steve the Egg.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What's the difference between an elephant and a plum? Their color. What did Tarzan say when he saw the elephants coming over the hill? Here come the elephants over the hill. What did Jane say when she saw the elephants coming over the hill? Here come the plums over the hill. She was color blind.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

A: How can you tell a tree is an aspen? B: 'Cause of the way it is.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What's worse than requesting a three-some to your in-laws? Forgetting to suggest that they me too fragile and disabled, resulting in one of their limbs breaking.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

A dyslexic man walked into a bra

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Why do elephants paint there feet yellow? so they can hide in mustard bottles. Have you ever seen an elephant in a mustard bottle? exactly

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Why couldn't the old man see the Moon? Because he was blind and it was daytime.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Joe Paterno walks into a bar...he should've walked into a police station and filed a report.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

A red-head, a brunette and a blond are trapped on an island 10km from civilization. The red-head swims 1.5km's, but is to tired, so she swims back to the island. The brunette swims 3km's, but is too tired, so she swims back to the island. After watching the first two fail, the blond evaluates the situation and decides that she does not possess the swimming ability required to reach the 5km point (At which swimming back to the island becomes equally as far as swimming to civilization), and instead stays on the island and creates a signal fire out of bits of debris scattered on the island, getting rescued within hours.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

A man fell in a hole. He's dead now...

thumb_up thumb_down -9

when life throws you lemons you should probably get out of the way because it will hurt

thumb_up thumb_down -9

there once was a man, he was old, and he had one wish...do you wanna know that wish? Well i don't know it because he died two seconds ago from a heart attack. Oh Well...

thumb_up thumb_down -9

How do you drown a blonde? Force her head underwater until she can no longer breathe, thus shutting down her brain and killing her.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Why was the man picking his nose? Because he was born without one, and found one he liked.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Q: which is easier to unload a truck of dead babies or a truck of alove babies? A: dead babies cause u can use a pitchfork

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops