Why was the man weird... Stevie Wonder

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A dad says to his son "you better stop masturbating or youll go blind'. And the son says "dad im over here".

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A man lying in bed at night rolls over and starts rubbing his wife's back. She says, "Not tonight, honey, I have a headache." Her husband respected her wishes and went to sleep.

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What's the difference bettween the holocaust and a bee, 6 million jews died during the holocaust. Bees make honey.

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What has four legs in the morning, three at noon, and two in the evening? A baby with leprosy.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Some poems rhyme This one doesn't.

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What do you call a flat-chested woman with a penis? A man.

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why did bob marley die because he did also he smoked weed he was naughty!

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What's more absurd than a goldfish astronaut? A jew that cares about palestinians

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three black teenagers went to the cinema to watch twilight

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why did the black child cry? strange men cut his penis off

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What do you call a black man driving an airplane? A pilot.

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What's the difference between Paris Hilton and a cow? Cows are ruminants, meaning that they have a digestive system that allows use of otherwise indigestible foods by regurgitating and rechewing them as "cud". Paris Hilton, on the other hand, is a human being. Therefore, her stomach digests the bolus (masticated food) only after it has exited the oesophagus into the body of the organ, where it is digested into chyme and then passed through the pyloric sphincter into the duodenum.

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what is the difference between jelly and jam? jelly is smoother where jam has chunks of fruit in it...... and i cant jelly my penis down your throat

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Why was the pedophile in jail? For indecent exposure to a child.

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what did the window say to the other window nothing they are both inanimate objects

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There's this traveling merchant from Flint, MI. He goes door to door trying to sell shampoo. He is having a lot of trouble selling shampoo in Flint because they were hit hard during the recession and now ahve trouble affording even the most seemingly cheap products.

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What's grey and doesn't climb trees? A car park.

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Hey, is that your corvette. No I thought it was yours.

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What is faster? A bottle of milk or a sand-filled pin ball machine? A fighter jet, stupid!

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Q:Why does poop stink? A: it comes from butts.

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How do you knock a cat out of a tree? If that doesn't work, use a lethal BB gun

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Why was the man sad? His brother died.

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Why is my son so unhappy? Because I beat his mother violently in front of him

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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