Why did the man get go to sleep? He got hit in the face with a hammer.

How did 3 fat women fit under 1 small umbrella and not get wet? It wasn't raining!

What is worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding Barney the purple dildo!

When life gives you limes, say hey! wait a second ,aren't these meant to be lemons? then kill yourself

How I Met Your Mother, starring Oedipus Rex

Roses are red, My name is Dan, I have a gun, get in the van

Why are people attacking the Jews we gave you so much things like: Television (Thomas Edison) Electricity (Thomas Edison) Weapons (Arvin Humbergs) Wifi (Edcolsin Vinstein) Be gr8 ful without us your nothing

What's the difference between a black guy and a white guy mushroom soup in my testicles belly Buton cheese.com ( tickle my. Nipple frog)

What did the cookie ask the glass of milk? Will you wash me down

How many dead babies does it take to paint a wall? First of all, babies do not have the physical ability or the mental capacity to ever paint a wall, no matter how many of them there are. Second of all, they are dead which probably will not increase their chances of painting said wall.

Knock knock Who's there? Benjamin Benjamin who? Benjamin Dover Ben! I'm so glad you're home the kids have missed you so much!

Why did the baby die? Because you had sex with it when it was only 1 years old.

A jew walked into a bar Hitler said.... A jew walked out of a concentration camp

My wife's star sign was Cancer and its quite ironic how she died really... She was attacked by a giant crab.

What is my name? I dont know

Q: How many babies does it take to paint a wall? A: Depends on how hard you throw them.

Why was six afraid of seven? Back when seven was in Vietnam, he sufferd Posttraumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD) and constantly has flash backs and irrational thoughts of six being with the veitnamese alliance and tries to viciously molest six whenever he runs out of anxiety medication.

josh sucks polish adams dick

A lady was walking to the grocery store as she was walking she saw a old lady with a dog behind them where two black merses and about 200 women behind the merses. The lady Rushes over and ask '' Maim i am sorry to bother you but i would like to know who you lost and how?'' The old lady paused for a minute and awnsered '' I lost my husband and mother in law, Well My husband had just walked in to the house and my new dog went and ferousiously atacted him my mother in law had been living with us at the time she the jumped in and tried to help him They both died because of blood loss'' The lady looked at her with simpathy and thought i feel sorry for her husband and his mother she then asked '' Can i barrow your dog'' the old lady looked puzzled and said '' Get in line '' The lady walked to the end of the line as the dog was Passed to a women and taken home then passed back. When the women got her turn she thought do i want to kill my husband then she thought yes

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was the only way to get across

What's the difference between Jews and pizza? God likes pizza

what are the best kind of bees none they sting and hurt like hell

yo mother is so fat, the recursive function computing her mass causes a stack overflow.

Why did the boy fall over? Because he got hit by a car. Follow forever.art7 on Insta.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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