Why did the little girl fall off the swing? She had no arms.

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Why can Randy Moss Jump so high? Because he trained to jump high.

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What did one tree say to the other tree? Nothing, trees can't talk.

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What did the boy with AIDS, polio, one eye and one arm get for Christmas? Cancer.

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Doctor! I have no problems at all! So, uh why are you here? Isnt that freaking weird? Wow, that might be a problem! Puh! I have a problem then. Yeah, goodbye!

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Why did Sally fall off the tree? Because Sally weighed 500 lbs and it was a bamboo tree.

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Man: Hey girl for a minute there I thought I had died and gone to heaven, but now I realize that I am very much alive, and that heaven has been brought to me. Girl: No actually you were right the first time we are both dead right now.

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why did Lucy fall down? she got hit with a hammer

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whats worse then a child with a dead mom? the baby is still inside.

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Roses are red Violets are purple, and anyone who tells you otherwise is wrong.

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What did the purple dragon say to the unicorn? He doesn't say anything to the unicorn because dragons and unicorns don't exist. Even if they did exist, dragons and unicorns can't talk, unless we're talking about cartoons. Also, even if it was a cartoon or whatever, do you really think a purple dragon has ANYTHING to say to a unicorn?! Of course not! Oh look at me I'm a cool talking dragon, I have something so important to say to this unicorn. Gimme a break...

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Why was the black man unemployed and in debt? Because current socio-economic realities and systematic racial discrimination place him at a disadvantage in terms of education and employment. Indeed, it is statistically probable that he was raised below the poverty-line, greatly limiting his opportunities from a young age.

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A man walks inta pet store looking for a dog. All he finds are cats.What did he end up buying. A weasel

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What do you get when you add two boys and two girls in a basement? Four people fearing their lives during a tornado.

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Why couldn't the pirate watch the violent movie? Because pirates died along time ago

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What did the aborted fetus say to the recycling bin? Nothing because it isn't capable of speaking, and it was in the dumpster

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Why was Susie's mom crying? Because Susie got hit by a bus

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Yo momma so fat shes eating right now

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Q: How are a plum and a rabbit alike? A: They're both purple, except for the rabbit.

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How do you get a one armed Polish man out of a tree? With a ladder, he needs help.

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Why is 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 is a killer

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What did John say to Tim Hi I'm John

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why does stuart own alot of hollister because he is autistic

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roses are grey, violets are grey, i dont have any cones, just rods.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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