What did the Irish nun say on her deathbed? "I now realize that smoking was an unhealthy habit and I regret that I made the choice to do so." Then she died

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What's green and fuzzy and if it fell out of a tree it could kill you? A pool table

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We can consider a wind turbine as a great ventilator that produces heat.

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What came first? The chicken or the egg? The egg, because breakfast comes before dinner.

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What's the best way to get high without doing drugs? Jump.

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What's the difference between a baby and a trampoline? I actually take my shoes off when I jump on the trampoline.

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Why did the kids put pirahnas in Mr. Hermann's fish tank? So they could eat him.

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bangers and mash?

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Why did the black man cross the road? To get to the chicken!

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Why is the old lady crying? I threw a fridge at her.

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WHY DONT WE HAVE BOTH?

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why did the hobo want cancer so badly? he really needed a haircut

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What does AIDS smell like? AIDS has no smell. AIDS is a diease contracted though sexual contact with another being with the diease. It greatly increases the risk of infections and malignancy. Although AIDS has no smell, in the final stages large sores develope on the surface of the skin. This means you are going to die. Thus, HIV/AIDS has no smell.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It's really irrelevant when you realize this joke is about a suicidal chicken...

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Why was the uneducated black guy raped? To make this joke more risky and therefore funnier.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have 5 fingers and the middles for you

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What's the difference between Michael Jackson and Neil Armstrong? Neil Armstrong was the first man to WALK on the MOON. And Michael Jackson was a child molester.

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So I have an idea that will solve both world population and hunger problems! I call it the Omni-Abortion law. The idea is that all babies must be aborted and then eaten. Progressive, right?

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Roses are red Violets are blue You're parents are dead All your friends are too

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Why did the man run away from the cat? He was allergic

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Have you seen stevie wonders new piano? No Well it's really nice

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What's a vampire's favorite dessert? Vampire's don't exist What's Helen Keller's favorite dessert? Helen Keller doesn't exist

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jack and jill went up the hill to get a bucket of water. jack fell down and broke his ankle and neck severely. jack and jill were taken away from their parents by child services, and their parents are charged for child endangerment and child labor.

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What do you call a giraffe driving a car? A danger to society.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops