Knock knock. Who's there? Nobody is here, nobody would ever want to knock on the door of you. Yes, you. You reading these awful jokes.

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Yar! What be a pirate's favorite football team? The Steelers. I'm originally from Pittsburgh.

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What's funnier than 1 anti- joke? Two anti- jokes.

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A man is driving down the highway. He falls asleep at the wheel due to his case of narcolepsy, and dies in a fiery car crash.

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A priest, a pedophile and a rapist walk into a bar. He orders a drink.

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why did the Asian father want his son to be a doctor? because he wants his son to live good life so he could have a loving family and a payable job.

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If these walls could talk - the public would pay large sums of money to see this marvel of science. On a more serious note, they might also tell the cops about the many dead hookers stowed within them.

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I had vodka + water and got drunk. had rum + water and got drunk. had gin and water and still got drunk. I've learnt my lesson. NO MORE WATER FOR ME

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, In Soviet Russia, Poem writes you.

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Your mom is so black, i shot a bullet at her. It came back and said i need a flashlight.

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Why did the chicken cross the road I don't know

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How do you survive the zombie apocolypse? You avoid dieing or being mutated in the living dead.

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What do you call a girl with an iq of 13 Dead

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A horse walks into a bar. The horse says "why the short face?"

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What did the girl say when she was hit by a train? Nothing she exploded on impact

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Who is the most vile man in Britain? Jerry Carr, the guy who works at the casino.

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this isn't meant to be a joke, but just letting all of you know, inside jokes don't count and kony jokes aren't funny

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what's the difference between an abortion clinic and my basement? there are more dead fetuses in my basement

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your mamas so fat she tried to hang herself but the rope broke.

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How do you discover a gay snowman? If the carrot is in the ass.

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I got 99 problems and they're all related to long history of drug abuse

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A B C D E F G.... Gummy bears are chasing me 1 is red, 1 is blue 1 is tryin to steal my shoe now i'm running for my life cuase the red 1 has a knife

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Q: What's red and bad for your teeth A: A brick

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A man asked Alexander the Great if he was gay, yet Alexander the Great was not offended. Why? Because "gay" has a rather different connotation than in the modern world than it did in earlier time periods where it meant "happy". Also, Macedonians, Alexander the Great's native people, did not speak English so he would not understand the question. Also Alexander the Great was gay in the sense that he was actually a homosexual.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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