roses are green, violets are yellow, I am a hybridizer.

How many candles did Johnny blow out on his birthday cake? The same number of candles which corresponds to his age.

What color is an orange chicken? Fried rice

Why did the little boy leave his bike on the side of the road? He was kidnapped and his body was found 2 weeks later at Penn State

What is the difference between a pizza and a Jew?

Roses are Blue Violets are Red I have Alsheimers... Cheese on Toast

How did bill lose his legs he got them amputated after contracting a severe case of "INeedToGetMyLegsAmputatedSyndrome"

Why are rich guys gay? They can afford to be

I forgot what i was gonna say

How do you get someone to shut up? Shove a fork down their throat and hang them by thier thumbs

What do you call a man with no arms and no legs hanging on the wall? Wally.

How do you make a girl scout cry? Steal her cookies

Everyone believes in something. If you believe "you'll have another drink," you may be an alcoholic.

What number is funnier than 23? 24.

Q: What do you call someone who cant swim? A: A person that cant swim.

what's the last thing you want to hear during surgery? your wife complaining

Why did the boy jump off the building? To get to the bottom.

There once was an old lady who lived in shoe. She had so many children, her uterus fell out.

What do you call a dear with no eyes? A no-idear

Q: Why did the boy have blue balls? A: because the respectable girl with high self esteem refused to give him head.

How do you spell eight? 8

"Hey have you seen Stevie wonders car. Neither has he.

What's worse than being dead? Nothing.

What did the astronaut say to his girlfriend?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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