A homeless guy walked up to me and said "Any change?", to which I replied, "Nope, your still homeless". We laughed and laughed. The he stabbed me.

Text this number just cuz 16305208722

When SCUBA diving, why is it important to fall backward off the side of the boat? Because if you fell forward, you would still be in the boat.

How do you make a person cry? You bury them alive.

Why can't you lie to atoms? Because they make up everything!

Knock, knock. Who's there? "Dwane!" I don't know any Dwane. Perhaps you have the wrong address. "Oh. Sorry to have bothered you!"

A bar walks into Chuck Norris.

Bob: I have a funny knock knock joke, but you have to start it. Joe: Ok. Knock Knock. Bob: Who's there? Joe: Uhhhhhhh Bob: Exactly.

How did the Muslim pilot die? He had a fatal heart attack while flying over the Atlantic and as a result the 300 passengers died by drowning.

What are crabs with out the crabs Nothing hahahahaha

Why did the chiken cross the road? It didn't, J-walking is against the law.

What is the answer to life, universe and everything? Nothing.

Knock Knock Who's there? Me ill kill u,

Why do midgets laugh when they run? Because the grass tickles there balls

Why doesn't my mom make dinner anymore? she died in a fire on my birthday.

Q: whats the difference between 3 asain people 3 black people and 3 mexican prople?? A: there all different nationality

A black man, a Mexican man, a Jew, an Asian man, and a white man get into a fight. Who won? Well since their dispute got all the way to a fight, I guess nobody really wins.

Whats funnier than a dead baby? a dead baby in a clown costume!!!

Whats worse than getting a splinter? Taking a shower at penn state

What's black, white, and red all over? Numerous different objects because many different things can posses a variety of colors, including the ones listed above.

If 2 wrongs make a right and 2 rights make a wrong, then when you have 4 rights=2 wrongs, you have a true statement. If you have 8 rights = 4 wrongs, you have a verified statement.

What's worse than a teacher yelling at you? The holocaust

A white man applies for a job two weeks later he finds out he lost the job to a hardworking Mexican who went to college and payed his debts

How did the chicken cross the road? Assuming the vehicles yielded to the chicken, it looked both directions before crossing then proceded across the street while staying between the crosswalk lines until it had reached the other side of the road.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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