What did little boy with no arms and no legs get for chrismas: a bike

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How do u turn on a lamp? Flip the switch

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What would you call Shaquille O'Neal if he was on the moon? Shaquille O'Neal, or any nickname you may have for him.

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I asked my wife to make me a sandwich. I had forgotten she was dead.

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If a train leaves Chicago at 50 miles per hour, how hard does the baby strapped to the tracks get splattered?

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whats pink, brown, and smells like a banana. monkey vomit?

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what happened to the chicken who crossed the road he didn't realize that the light was green

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Call me for a good time! 402-805-2412, I do anal!;) -Martini Wyant

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why did the chicken eat his brother? he was a canivore

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A Mexican, a Jew, and a Colored guy walk into a bar, the bartender looks up and says: "What can I get you gentlemen today?"

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what do you get when you cross a broken arm and a broken leg? .... a broken head.

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What did the fisherman say to the other fisherman? Were both fishermen

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What's worse than a dead baby? What a sick question. Most would argue that nothing is worse than the death of an infant.

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Whats the best thing about having sex with twenty eight year olds? There's twenty of them.

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what's red and has seven feet? the red man who had seven feet as a result of a serious genetic mutation

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Two muffins were in an oven. The first muffin says: 'It sure is hot in here!' The second muffin says: 'Why are they only cooking two muffins?'

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Whats funnier than Dane Cook. The Holocaust.

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how do you know your sister is on her period? you dads dick taste like blood.

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Why did the man launch his rocket into the sun? He didn't. Overcoming the sun's orbital pull would require your rocket to travel ~7,400,000 mph, which is a velocity that is impossible for today's rockets to reach.

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Just friends, they too pretend to be you and copy the way you write and express yourself, I told them to stop though, Azure threatened someone here a cultist of sorts I think, that does not exactly put us in a better light with the people that where getting our messages, and yes they are coded, I sincerely had no idea though,

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hers a joke... japanese people

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what happened to the slut last time she opened her legs. a bee flew in and stung her. turned out she was deathly allergic. she died a painful death.

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What do you get when you cross a chicken and a dinosaur? You can't. Dinosaurs are extinct.

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Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops