- Anti Joke

What's the worst thing that can go wrong while trying to archieve something you desperately want? -Everything.

There once was a man from Nantucket, who had his car stolen and wasn't very happy so called the police.

Knock knock Who's there? Dave, I've got a fucking gun. Let me the fuck in.

Why are rich guys gay? Because they hang around other rich guys

What kind of doctors would you call A 30 year old chimpanzee? I would say "Plastic surgeon" but that would be unscrupulous to the chimpanzees because the tearing off or "lifting" of the owners face is because they are just animals. And should have never been kept in captivity that long anyways.

Q. What do humans and jelly beans have in common ? A. Nothing.

How do u get high, meet a leprachaun, and touch a rainbow? U find a leprechaun shoot him, steal his pot, and run up the rainbow silly!

Nero, man, I mean I will hurt you, I am on my way to the hospital, and seriously that pic does not look real, seriously on a hospital? I mean man, I am really sorry! I nearly killed you, how was i supposed to know you do not care about your teeth and take half a bottle of that calcium stuff? My mom? Yeah sure! She laughed at the message you sent her, and if you touch my sis, ill kill you, anyway I am on my way, you better change your mind or I will kick your ass!

what did the turnip say to the plum? nothing, as most fruits and vegetables would've said

An overweight person falls down the stairs.. They had to be taken to A&E as they suffered very serious injuries.

whats worth than finding half a dead worm in your apple getting rapped by your step dad

What happened to the gun that was jammed? It didn't shoot.

Q: How many Jews can u fit in a bathtub? A: Well it depends if you use their ashes.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

Want more? You might be interested in...

Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops

A man walks into a bar. He hits his head and dies.

What did the ginger say to god? Nothing it has no soul

Yo mammas so fat she wears big clothes!

rarw

What is round and bad-tempered? A vicious circle

A Irish leaves and bump in to a really tall the Irish sorry boss

Why did Jenny fall off her bike? She had no arms Knock knock Who's there Not Jenny

Q: What did the doctor say to the man with terminal cancer? A: You have terminal cancer.

Doctor, doctor! I think I've got an ear infection. I best give you some medicine.

Why does Obama not want to get buried? because he's still alive

Why do dogs walk across the street? Cause they can