whats cold, blue and hard? a frozen blueberry.

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1. The name of your street 2. The name of your pet 3. Your favorite activity 4. The color of your eyes 5. The number of shoes you own Now fill in the blank with the corresponding number to your answers. "One day I was ___3___ my dog when a pornstar named __(1)__ ___(2)___ asked me how many times I can ___(3)____ myself. I said ___(5)___ times and the juice that came out of me was __(4)___."

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because I felt like kicking something.

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What's worse than finding The Holocaust in your apple? Most things, because that's impossible.

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What is the difference between 100 dead babies and a Porsche? I don't have a Porsche in my basement.

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A guy thought it could be funny to write a joke that is not and post it on a social network. And did it

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How many straight naked men can you fit in a wardrobe? I'm not sure but the situation is highly unlikely!

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What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in a swimming pool? Determined.

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I got pussies, cocks, asses and bitches. In my animal store.

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I don't drink. I'm not 21.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it looking for food for it was starving to death.

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Why did Dom move to Wales? Because he is poor!

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apple was gonna make a smaller ipod for kids but decided not to because they didnt want the name to be itouch kids.

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A rhinoceros walks into a bar. As it felt threatened by the presence of many humans, the rhino attacks and kills several people with the big horn on its nose.

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Why did sarah fall of the swing? she has no arms. Knock knock. whos there? not sarah.

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"Hey ask me if i'm fat" "Are you fat" "Leave me alone"

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Two elves walk into a bar. The hobbit laughs and walks under it.

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There were three men standing outside. They were enjoying the nice weather.

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A teacher, a lawyer, and a doctor are all at the edge of the cliff. Then they jump off and die.

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A muslim gets on an airplane and takes his seat. The plane lands safely and he enjoys his vacation in Florida.

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how many weasels does it take to change a lightbulb 0 weasels are animals and therefore are not capable of changing lightbulbs

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Q; Whats the hardest part about nailing a dead baby to a wall? A; my dick while doing it.

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How do you make etheopians rave ? glue bread to the roof

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What is the funniest shirt Emil heskey has ever worn? A shirt that had this joke on it

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops