Once upon a time there lived 3 polar bears; a mummy polar bear, a daddy polar bear and a baby polar bear. Ond day the baby polar bear said to the daddy polar bear "I don't feel like a polar bear, I'm cold!" and the daddy polar bear said "You look like a polar bear."

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What did the kid with no arms or legs get for Christmas? Cancer

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Q: How many dead babies does it take to fill a mixing bowl? A: There is an infinite amount of answers to this question depending on the sizes and shapes or the dead babies, so lets assume that an average would probably be about 4 babies that dies just as the left the mother.

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A plane carrying an Englishman, an Irishman, and a Scotsman is destined to crash unless some weight is lost. First they drop the spare engine, but there is still too much weight. Then they drop the luggage, but still there is too much weight. All three men then jump out. The plane crashes anyway.

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A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead are in a terrible ship crash that leaves them stranded on a desert island. All of their survival supplies sank with the boat so they don't last very long.

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what do you get a man with no arms or legs for his birthday? a quick, painless death.

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How long does it take for a black woman to have a shit. 9 months.

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What do you call a man with a horse? A man

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why did the baby cross the road? It was stapled to the chicken.

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why were the niggas in paris? rhetorical question. everyone knows they aren't french

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What's wrong with black people? They tend to make mistakes, as do all humans

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How do you kill a jew? Same way you would anyone

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What do you call a lion eating a gazelle? the food chain.

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Whats the difference between a penis and a vagina? Pancakes,

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Knock Knock. Who's there? You Know. You Know who?.......GOODBYE!

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What did the cannibal do after he dumped his girlfriend........... Wiped his ass

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What did the little orphan girl get for christmas? nothing her parents are dead

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An Englishman, a Scotsman and a Welshman are all in the Great Britain Olympic squad,

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whats the difference between a mexican and a bench? a mexican has elbows.

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Q: What did the two muffins say in the oven? A: OMG we are in an oven, "OMG a talking muffin"

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One a upon of time there was man named Cinderella. He was so mad because his name was Cinderella. The end.

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Jerry Sandusky walks into an Under 21

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Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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