What's worse than sex with a midget? Non-consensual sex with a midget.

Q. Why dont people like shane murchan ? A. Because he wears chinos .....

Timmy's mom is an alcoholic. His dog is asleep in the backyard. Timmy asks his mother, "Why is our dog sleeping?" His mother replies, "It's not sleeping, its dead."

A girl asks her best friends: Why are you only wearing one earring? The best friends replies: Because I took the other one out.

What do you call an iPod that doesn't work? An iPod that doesn't work.

Want to hear a joke? ...you're straight.

God hates fags, no...god i'snt real

Once upon a time, your dog got hit by a car this morning

What is red and smells like brown feces? Bloody feces

Why did the officer arrest the black man? Because he suspected him of littering. ...and because he was black.

Q: What is the difference between a pile of dead babies and a ferrari? A: I don't have a ferari in my garage.

Q:What happened when the bear walked into the bar? You cannot answer because you were seriously injured by the bear.

What would you do for a kwuandike bar? Anything clean and sanitary that wouldn't provide harm to me or others near me

How do you make a baby stop crying for the rest of its life? Shoot it in the face.

Q: What was the pirate movie rated? A: PG-13 for violence and brief nudity.

What did the boy in the wheelchair get for Christmas? A bicycle.

What do you call a black man driving a fire truck? A firefighter you racist.

Why was the blonde fired from her job at the M&M's factory? Her Masters Degree in electrical engineering made her overqualified for the position she had.

what did the black man say to the Muslim? "you the bomb"!

What did the muffin say to the other muffin? "Hello, nice to meet you."

A blonde, brunette, and red-head were on a deserted island. The blonde said, "in thirty years or so, we'll all have gray hair."

I went to the opticians to get my eyes checked. The optician said "you need glasses".

Q; Whats the hardest part about nailing a dead baby to a wall? A; my dick while doing it.

A man asked a guy in a store for football cleats The guy got all confused because footballs cannot wear cleats

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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