What do you call the offspring of a gerbil and a hamster? Whatever you want.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

your momma is so fat she eats a lot of things

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What is the definition of a shame (as in "that's a shame")? When a picnic is postponed due to rain, or hired entertainment becomes unavailable at the last minute due to illness, or a book ends badly having started out well.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Yo' Mama's so old that her age is over the average age of most people.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

A Jew, a Catholic, and a Muslim walk into a bar. The bartender says, "What'll you have?" The Jew says, "I'll have a whiskey straight." The Catholic says, "I'll have a vodka tonic." The Muslim says, "I can't drink it's against my religion and I really shouldn't be here."

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What do you call the black stuff in between an elephant's toes? Depending on the location of the elephant it is either dirt or it may be tar in the case of an elephant in captivity.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

roses are red, violets are blue, if you want to success, stop being a mess..

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What do you call a person with an eye patch, no arms, and a mohawk? A person with an eye patch, no arms, and a mohawk.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Wanna hear a dirty joke? ... A boy played in mud.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Whats better than 32 dead babies stapled to 1 tree? - 1 dead baby stapled to 32 trees

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What did the man think as the foul baseball flew rapidly toward his face? Oh man, I thought my tickets were to an NBA game.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

A man walks into a bar owned by horses. The bartender says, "Why the short face?"

thumb_up thumb_down +13

what happens when a retard hits an iceberg with a gigantic boat? 1517 people die.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Q. What did the dead man do after he died? A. Nothing. He's dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What do you call a pig that does karate? By its name. Pigs are often referred to by something regarding the 'Oink' sound that they make. Perhaps in this instance, the pigs name was Oinky. However, this is only a supposition. The range of names is really too wide to make a fair prediction.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

today in aa we were telling stories one of them was: that a girl put a wet cat (to dry it) in the oven

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What does "Ford" stand for? Nothing. It's the name of the company founder, not an acronym.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Why doesn't Julius Caesar ever use a cell phone? Because he died in 44 BC.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Roses are Red, Violets are Red, Everything is Red, Retinal Hemorrhage.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

whats the difference between 10 Ferrari's and 10 dead babies ? i dont have 10 Ferrari's in my garage

thumb_up thumb_down +13

knock knock whos there? andy andy who? andy gold hi come in

thumb_up thumb_down +13

How do you torture helen keller? Waterboard her.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Roses are red, Violets are blue; In Soviet Russia, POEM WRITES YOU!

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Knock knock. Who's there? Your mother. Please open the door. Your mother who? You were adopted.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops