Q. Why did the little boy fall off the swing? A. Because he has no arms.

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Knock knock? Who's there? Interupting Doctor? Interupting Doc... You have cancer

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A policeman walks into a pretzel shop. He sees two freshly baked pretzels. One was a salted.

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What's red, white, and black, and spins around and around? A penguin in a blender

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I was going to tell a joke about your mom's vagina, but that's overused.

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whats better than a girl getting hit by a car? a girl getting hit by a car with my dick in her

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A car with four Mexicans drives off of a cliff. What's the bad news? They were my friends.

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justin beiber is having intimate sex with a woman.

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What burns like hell? Gonorrhea.

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Two men were standing on the 34th floor of a 65 floor building. They were trapped in a office with one window. here is their conversation: guy1: oh no what should we do??? guy2: I don't know!! this is awful!!! guy1: I have children and a loving wife!!! guy2 walks to the window sill and leans over. guy1: what are you doing? there is more to life we can get through this!! guy 2 jumps out the window guy 1 runs to the window sticks his head out and yells "MAKE MINE CHOCOLATE!!!"

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A blone walks into a bank in New York City and asks the bank teller for a $5000 loan because she's going to Mexico for 2 weeks. The bank teller said he would need some security for the money. The blonde tells him her new Rolls Royce is in the parking Lot and she hands him the keys. The blonde gets the money and goes on her trip. Another employee at the bank then parks the car in the underground parking garage. He later ffinds out the blonde is a multi millionaire. When the blonde arrives home from she pays back the $5000 and $15 interest. When the bank teller asks her why she gave them a $250000 car for security or needed the $5000 loan if she was a multi millionaire, the blonde answers, "Where else can you park your car in New York City and expect it to stillbe there when you return?"

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A black man walks into a bar full of white people. And then... He orders his drink.

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What do you call five black me pushing a car? "Very nice young men who helped me when I broke down," according to my grandmother.

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If there's somethin' strange in your neighborhood Who ya gonna call 911

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Why did the paperboy fall off his bike? I threw a fridge at him because he was a ginger.

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How do you tell identical twins apart? You can't. They look identical.

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How did the girl cross the road? -She didn't, she died because she was blind and didn't see the "don't walk" sign.

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What's big fat and ugly? A monster

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What kind of mother doesn't do laundry? A dead one.

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When my parents said that they chucked a flipper baby into the Atlantic ocean I assumed a baby seal, I later found out that happened to my disabled brother.

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Wanna hear a joke? no

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If a tree falls on a woman and there is no one around to hear it, she was probably lonely.

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- Knock knock. - Who's there? - Jehovah - Jehovah who? - Jehovah's Witness - Go f*** yourself.

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I am green. You are blue. Jokes are infinite. This is too.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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