What's the difference between Neal Armstrong and Michael Jackson? Neal Armstrong was the first man to WALK on the MOON, while Michael Jackson enjoyed touching young boys.

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12 in general

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What did the amputee get for chritmas? A bicycle

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"Roses are red, violets are blue," she explained to the color blind child, who was unable to understand the concept of color.

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-Why was little Johnny sad? >Why? -Because he had a frog stapled to his forehead.

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WELCOME TO THE GARLIC BOYS SHOW! So kids, what are we gonna eat today? POTATOES! FUUUUUUU! Moral: You say tomata, I say WROOOOOOOONG, you say cheap I say your mother.

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What is an offensive way to refer to black people from the time of the Flint Stones? Niggers

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Why did Austin Bell smell like tuna? He had sea food at Joes Crab Shack

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Hey what did you do on The weekend??? I got hit by a bus!

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Why did the monkey eat the banana? Because it was sexually confused

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Why did the toilet paper roll? Because it isn't rock!

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What's the difference between a police officer and a green dinosaur? They both aren't cabbages.

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Why did the water in the lake disappear? There was a toilet at the bottom.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I love you a lot But you're dead and I have unhealthy necrophiliac tendencies

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What did the kid say to the ice-cream Man Can I have a duck please

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Comedian: Do you all wanna hear a joke? Audience: Yeah!!! Comedian: Okay! What did the bad comedian say to the audience? Audience: What?!! Comedian: Chicken butt. Thank you, you've been a great crowd. Good night!

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What is brown and smells bad? A white person that had been bathed in brown paint, and didn't shower for the next month, and rubbed poop all over them, and rubbed diarrhea all over them and rubbed rock poop all over them and rubbed pee all over them, and rubbed mud all over them, and pooped in a bottle.

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An Irishman walks into a bar. He died of alcohol poisoning that day

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What does DNA stand for? National Dyslexic Assosiation.

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Why can't you fit 100 oranges in a bathtub? Because motorcycles don't have doors

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A man walks into a bar. and buys a drink.

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An African-American is like a hammer. It can't be trusted in the hands of women.

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Can you spot the polar bear Probably not because global warming killed it

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Ask me if I'm well Are you well? No

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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