what did the boy with cancer get for christmas? i dont know he's jewish

Why cant Helen Keller drive a bus? Cuz she's dead!

Knock knock Who's there? Boo AHHH A GHOST D:

What's worse than being in the Holocaust? Dying in the Holocaust.

Why didn't Johnny's father come home? He was killed in Afghanistan.

What is the difference between a Mexican and a bike? they both get hit by cars in shady neighborhoods, like Copiague, New York

What's the difference between a BMW and a pile of dead babies? There isn't a BMW in my garage.

What do you call Jack Black on a bad day? Kevin Hart.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was dead.

I went to the local RSPCA office today....it's tiny, you couldnt swing a cat in it.

What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? A Jew is a person who adheres to the Jewish faith and claims a cultural or ancestral connection to the Jewish people, and a pizza is an oven-baked, flat, disc shaped bread usually topped with tomato sauce and mozzarella and then a selection of meats, depending on taste and culture.

Why didn't the Mexican dwarf eat his taco? Well, he actually started, but he had already had one earlier. So, he gave half to his friend who gladly accepted the free taco.

q: what do you call it when Justin Bieber has sex? a: sex, just like everyome else calls it

whats on object, almost tube like that squirts thick white liquid from the top elmer's glue

Her hair was fine, her scent was great, now show me your fucking ****.......please

A boy got scratched by a dog and nearly killed him. When he grew up, a dog came running up to him and started biting and scratching him till he couldn't handle it. Then a plane crashed into him and he died.

roses are red violets are blue show me your bed i wanna fuck you oh and roses are red violets are blue nice tits.

When Chuck Norris does a push up, he's working out.

How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

How do you help a black person find a job ? Tell them places that are hiring.

Ask me if I'm a tree. Are you a tree? Nope.

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

THAT AWKWARD MOMENT... nuff said

once upon a time jess was happy this once upon a time was a very long time ago, BABADOOK !

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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