What do you call Jack Black on a bad day? Kevin Hart.

Q. want to hear the biggest lie in the world ? A. sure A.I have read and agree to the Terms of Service - View Terms of Service

What did Helen Keller get for Christmas? A read along book

Why did the White man scream when he saw a Black man? Because he was scared.

what draws the line between sex and rape? a pen

Hey Skrillex! Can you do me a favor and hold this bass for me? Sure thing, no problem. 3 seconds later... Oops! My bad! I just dropped it.

what do michael Jackson and little boys do in the dark alone? they turn on the flashlight

If an asian man is really angry with a jewish man named gabriel what does he say? Gabriel I am angry with you

Chick Norris... Enough said

You know what's funny? You can't spell manslaughter without laughter.

You have small feet Do you know what small feet mean Small shoes

What's the worse thing O.J. Simpson has gotten away with? Running a red light

Want to hear a joke? Justin Bieber's talent.

One day a kid said to his mom: "Mom, I painted the bed sheets with your lipstick". So his mom got mad.

What's the difference between a fat boy and a thin boy? Fizzy drinks!

One day, 2 people were gonna fight after school and then the final bell rung. Everyone gathered in the bathroom to watch the fight. The challenger asks the opponent, "Hey whats that one thing you say when you let the other person win?" then the opponent says, "I give up?" The opponent yells, "I win!"

Why did the chicken cross the road? Probably because this chicken had a mental disability and saw on the news that there was a hospital on the other side of the road that could treat his illness and possibly save his life, allowing him to fulfill his life-long dream of retirement. But knowing that chickens do not possess the brain power capable of understanding the situation that this chicken was in, it had probably gotten lost and just wandered off.

Whats green and smells like ass? My ass. I lied about the green..

If quizzes are quizzical then what are tests? Tests.

A panda walks into a restaurant, sits down and orders a sandwich. After he finishes eating the sandwich, the panda pulls out a gun and shoots the waiter, and then stands up to go. "Hey!" shouts the manager. "Where are you going? You just shot my waiter and you didn't pay for your sandwich!" The panda yells back at the manager, "Hey man, I am a PANDA! Look it up!" The manager's heart skipped a beat, and he locked himself inside his office, trembling with fear and confusion. Yes, it was plausible that a beast such as this could point to a random entry on the menu, and it was physically possible for it to pull the trigger of the gun (and, at such close proximity to the waiter, it would be pretty hard to miss him), but it was shocking and altogether disturbing to hear such an animal speak in human language, much less vernacular English.

who is 2 chainz? no one 2 chains is just 2 chains. spelled with an "s" not a "z"

Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

Why didn't the black man sit in the front of the bus? Because he lives in a society where it is illegal and socially unacceptable for a person of african decent to sit in towards the front of a bus, near the driver, which is most commonly reserved for a person of european decent.

A gorilla walks into a bar and gets a banana martini. The bartender thinks that this is peculiar, and then he realizes he is dreaming. He wakes up and tells his wife about this ridiculous dream that he had. His wife ignores him, and the man rolls over and begins to sob because he realizes that his marriage is in shambles.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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