- Anti Joke

A homeless guy walked up to me and said "Any change?", to which I replied, "Nope, your still homeless". We laughed and laughed. The he stabbed me.

Before you insult a man, walk a mile in his shoes. That way, when you insult him, you'll be a mile away, and have his shoes.

Your mamma's so obese that she can't stand up. She's been like this for years. That's because she's dead. She died of cardiovascular-related diseases.

Q: What's orange, hairy, and covered with gasoline? A: Definitely not a chair.

The motto of those who live in the Bible Belt; "The Bible Belt: Where being obese is 'Genetic' but being homosexual is a 'lifestyle choice'."

Until further notice Penn State's take your child to work day has been canceled.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Some poems rhyme, This one doesn't.

Q: What do you call a dog with no legs? A: It doesn't matter what you call him, he isn't going to come.

Why did the man scream when his dog ran into the room? Because he was afraid of dogs.

Johnny fell out of the window. Except he didn't fall I pushed him

What did Santa say when he came to drop off your toys? Nothing. Santa doesn't exist.

why dont black people celebrate thanksgiving? kfc is closed on holidays

a man was beating his wife his wife asks him to stop he says no and continues beating her

Why did the black homeowner default on his house? He was paying significantly more in mortgage than the actual market value of the home, since he purchased his property before the housing bubble. He carried out a cost/benefit analysis and derived the conclusion that he was effectively destroying his own wealth by paying his mortgage bills.

What's the object with the most points according to science and math? A sphere.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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A homeless guy walked up to me and said "Any change?", to which I replied, "Nope, your still homeless". We laughed and laughed. The he stabbed me.

Hitler wasn't such a bad guy. He did kill Hitler.

What do you call a calculator without a brain? A calculator.

im 14, over weight and spotty! you interested? .... im desperate:)

why was Lucy fat? Her BMI was over the recommended average.

Whats brown and sticky? Shit.

What's faster, a train or a bike? A horse because a cow gives milk

what did Stan say to Dave? nothing, Dave died 500 years before Stan was born, thus he said nothing.

WHat is funnier than a baby swimming. - A baby drowing.!

What do you call a cat with 1 eye, 4 legs, and its tongue out? Road kill.