Whats the biggest party fowl? Murder

Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.

say it ten times fast: oh

Did you hear the one about the spoon and the dis running away while the cow jumped over the moon, IMPOSSIBLE! eating material such as the spoon and dish are inanimate objects, and cows cant jump for they weigh from 600 to 1000 lbs.

Why did the black guy wear a hat? To keep the sun out of his eyes

How many Santa Clauses does it take to change a light bulb? Santa Claus isn't real.

What did the little girl buy for her cat? A box to bury him in.

why did the blue berry cross the road

This one time, at band camp, I played the trumpet.

How many Jews can you fit in a Volkswagen Bug? Four in the seats, twenty six in the ash tray, and thirty in the gas chamber.

Why did the chicken cr-VAGINA!!!!!!!!!!! sorry, tourettes.

Why are bannanas bendy? Because unlike cucumbers bannas are not grown in a tube and are left to grow at their own pace.

XD, You must really like me Nero, do you think people have problems telling us apart here?

How do you get 100 babies into a bucket? A blender. How do you get them out? Tortilla chips.

What did Harry Potters owl say to Harry Potter? delivowe for hawwy potter!

Aww Eliza, thanks for being around in spirit, dont leave yet, I am kinda having breathing problems, and Alice says my something levels are dropping because I need solid food, please dont leave, I cant tell time even with a watch, but would you mind waiting a bit? Ill eat fast, somehow.

just in time?

Why did the chicken kill himself To get to the other side.

Its a bird...its a plane....it IS a plane

knock knock whos there a duck a duck who QUACK!

Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know, that's why I'm asking you.

what do u tell a woman who has two black eyes? nothing, somebody already told her twice.

Why was the man in the kitchen? Because his wife was raped and killed.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I'm an expert on flowers.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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