How many black people does it take to tar a roof? Just one. Unless he wants to do it in a shorter amount of time and calls a few friends to help him.

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How do you write an anti-joke? With the keyboard Or voice recognition software

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Get on the boat.

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Why can't Elvis Presley drive a car backwards? Because he's dead!

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What's worse than having AIDS? A piano falling on your left middle finger.

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A guy forgot his 20th wedding anniversary. His wife was really mad, and said that she better have something in the driveway that goes from 0 to 350 in 10 seconds, and he quickly pulled out an AK-47 and murdered her violently.

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What did the lady with Alzheimer's do yesterday She can't remember

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What did one tampon say to the other? Nothing. They were both stuck up bitches

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Why is it scientifically proven that even Spider-Man would be a match for Superman? Because none exist. Moral: The only Super Hero... not scientifically proven, but I exist so that makes me stronger than both of them!

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hey girl, My Gyarados is BIG enough for you to ride it ALL day and night

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Why didn't the man go to the movies?? Because he likes pie.

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I HATE GEORGE LOPEZ

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If you call Dani a dog one more time, lick a gooch nut suckers. XoXo Jamie <3

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I stepped into the bathroom and began to take a shower. Then, I panicked. I was so thirsty, and I did not take the advantage to drink some water before I stepped into the bathroom. But then I realized: "Wow, I am so silly. I am standing under the shower, so I could easily just expedite my washing and drying, exit the bathroom, get dressed, and grab something to drink from the kitchen!" Then I showered quickly and got something to drink.

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your mom is so fat that she had to start going to a gym to exercise and get her weight under control.

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I am a schizophrenic, so am I.

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What would George Washington do if he was able to talk to all of America? Ask them to dig him up.

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A man walks into a bar with a frown on his face His dog just died

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I had a terrible childhood. My mom abandoned me before I was born.

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What did one dog say to the other? Nothing silly...dogs can't talk.

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How do you drown a blonde? Force her head underwater until she can no longer breathe, thus shutting down her brain and killing her.

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What did the little boy get for christmas? Nothing. He's jewish

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yolo your orange looks orange

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A black man walks into a KFC. He buys a bucket of chicken, then distributes it to several homeless men he supports off of his meager income because he knows their situations are much worse than his.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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