hello

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question: why did the dog whine? answer: Because it wanted the freakin bone

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There is a terrorist attack. Muslims are blamed for it.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was late for its laser bypass surgery.

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What do an eagle and a mole have in common? They both fly, except for the mole.

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so a man walks into a store looking for a new sheet,the cashier he goes to is chinese He leaves with a new sheet and is satisfied with it,oh wait,he gave me a pile of shit,sorry guys i had to -chuckles

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were you expecting a joke

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Why was David enjoying his cream of mushroom soup? Because David had spent the last 17 days eating flouescent light fix-ins.

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What do you call a black man on the moon An astronaut

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cory is gay

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What is worse than torturing, "forcibly penetrate" and then slowly and painfully kill nine billion people? The Holocaust?

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What do you call 1000 black men walking down a street? The million man march

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Woah, I mean if I was not like super high right now, I would totally hate you for that, you are what we call a charming asshole Nero, you can do that kinda stuff and completely get away with it, I feel like I should be really ashamed... So like does it work on everybody reading this? That would be wack, so much fun to do that.

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What's the difference between a Ferrari and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a Ferrari in my garage.

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Awesome! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> minecraftnow.us <

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Which is funnier: a sack of coal or a sack of old clothes? Neither is particularly funny.

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A grandfather clock fucked my bicycle!

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If you just read this, You're dead.

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Once there was a giant Pringle. His family was dead, his wife committed suicide. So one day he was walking to work, when he met a genie! The genie granted him three wishes. The Pringle's first wish was to have lots of money. His second wish was to have his wife back. Before he could complete his wishing, he awoke in a hospital where he was hooked up to life support and was in severe pain. His wife wasn't really dead, but he was out drinking and accidentally walked across a motorway and got hit by a huge lorry.

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Whats black and gay? Obama

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A dog walks up to a puddle of pee and he starts to smell it

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Voldemort's nose is so flat, that it looks like he doesn't have a nose.

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whats the difference between a grape and an elephant? the grape is purple

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Your mom is so stupid... She was unable to go to college and therefore was not able to find a good job.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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