What did the cat say to the dog? Communism

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Why did the Jew die? Because of old age

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Too get to the other side. Duuu no one crosses the road to get killed.

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Why did the black homeowner declare bankruptcy on his house? He was paying significantly more in mortgage than the actual market value of the home, since he purchased his property before the housing bubble. He carried out a cost/benefit analysis and derived the conclusion that he was effectively destroying his own wealth by continuing to pay his mortgage bills.

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What did the man say to the cat? I thought you were fake.

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What's the Chinese guy's favorite color? Blue.

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Whats dark, has an opening, and guys like to go into it? A Vagina

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What's the difference between a black guy and a white guy??? Just different pigmentation of their skin.

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what did the apple say to the orange ? nothing, apples are a fruit and do not have any organs which allow it to be able to talk.

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What is black and blue and red all over? A woman that just learned a valuable lesson.

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Q: How do you wake up Lady Gaga? A: You murder her friends and family.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? 'Cause he wanted to get squashed by the giant pancake.

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whats the difference between a dead baby and a watermelon? babies aren't fruit.

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Why don't dinosaurs eat other dinosaurs? They're all dead.

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Why is it scientifically proven that even Spider-Man would be a match for Superman? Because none exist. Moral: The only Super Hero... not scientifically proven, but I exist so that makes me stronger than both of them!

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Who made it down the cliff first the blonde or brunet? The brunet, the blonde had to stop for directions

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while having sex, the boy asked, "how many ears do elephants have?" his father answered, "two"

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What's white and can't climb trees? A fridge

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Roses are red Violets are blue I don't know how to rhyme Refrigerator ------------

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Knock knock. Who's there? Your bipolar aunt so don't ask again.

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Why does a woman with a little dark skin and black hair a Native American? Because she smells.

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In 2030, what will most people be doing for a living? Using food stamps.

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The FCC

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what is fun to eat but dumb when its alive? A dumb yummy candy

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops