Your mumma is so fat that she wears large clothes.

What would a gay, transgender, mexican man say to another? We could have butt sex.

You know how they say cats have nine lives? They don't.

Last Christmas, I gave you my heart, But the very next day, I died.

my mom just came up and saw me masturbateing

How did the frog fly? It drank a magic potion. How did the snake fly? It ate the frog How the the eagle fly? It already can.

How does a person with Alzheimers' poem go? Roses are red, Roses are red, Roses are red, Wait, what was I doing?

What did the fat man say to the other far man Hey your fat

You're such a dork you were found on the bottom of a whale.

Whats the difference between a house and a truck? Ones a truck the other one is a house

Why was the man so cold? He was in a fridge

A man asked Alexander the Great if he was gay, yet Alexander the Great was not offended. Why? Because "gay" has a rather different connotation than in the modern world than it did in earlier time periods where it meant "happy". Also, Macedonians, Alexander the Great's native people, did not speak English so he would not understand the question. Also Alexander the Great was gay in the sense that he was actually a homosexual.

How do you make your father cry? Poke him in the eye with a shovel, then continue to lower his self esteem with insults.

How many blondes does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Only one. It should only take one person to demonstrate such a simple task, regardless of their hair color.

Why did the man murder his wife? Because she would'nt do the the dishes

How do u kill a gay man? Shoot him in the head

My friend was waving a stick around and yelling out spells, so walked up to him and asked "You want to be Harry Potter, don't you?" He replied excitedly "Yeah!!" So i killed his parents and locked him under the stairs.

Why couldn't the black man get out of jail? He couldn't post his bond.

Two men walk into a bar and begin ordering drinks. Both men engage in polite conversation with each other. At the end of the night they each take taxi's home because they realize the potential risk they pose to others if they drive intoxicated.

What time is it in Florida? Time To Eat The President Of The United States!

why did the man turn on and off the lights 20 times because he was diagnosed with O.C.D as a child

whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? the holocaust

What did the hobo get for christmas? Nothing.

A priest, a pedophile and a rapist walk into a bar. He orders a drink.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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