What do Kurt Cobain and a whale have in common? Both have holes in the back of their heads

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Did you hear about the blonde that crashed her car? No. Is she okay?

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How do you confuse a blonde? To get to the other side

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Hey, I just met you And this is scabies So I'm prescribing you some permethrin.

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A russian gives away vodka.

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Relax, anyway I hope its just the not not hypnotic suggestion, it would be really disappointing to to know that you are high on weed, even if it is very relaxing, not that I would know, I tried valium once, it kinda increased that sensation you have tenfold. Anyway, what I meant to say was, would you kindly tell me what size your breasts are? Do you shave down there?

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Sure, I was not born yesterday, sounds serious, what is it?

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Why did they choose Madonna to perform in the halftime show? Because she might die soon.

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Q. Why was 6 afraid of 7? A. Because 7 was a scary dude.

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What is the gay guy thinking about? Penis

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A guy walks into a bar and finds a genie. The genie says he'll grant him 3 wishes. He wished for a blonde, a brunette, and a redhead. POOF! All 3 wishes were granted to him. The blonde drinks a shot a tequila, the brunette drinks a beer, and the redhead drinks a whiskey. They had a great time.

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Brenda said she found a pill to stop the effects of aging! It was a cyanide pill, Brenda is dead.

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Twitter: @TotalJokes: "So it's been 11 years since the planes hit the world trade centre, time really does fly by."

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Hey there, I like bananas! No you don't.

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What did ahmet say to adem...? LEMME SUCK ON THOSE TITS joke made by dark

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Why do cow say moo? Because you touch yourself at night

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What is worse than menopause? Falling down the stairs breaking your next....

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Yo mama's so fat when they asked her if she wanted fries with that she said yes

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Knock knock Who's there Done Done who? Done with waiting out here, let me in you dick!

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I hate rhyming, Sandwich.

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Why did God create Ebola? Because he hates us all.

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What's the difference between a sack of dead babies and my cousins? Nothing.

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What do you find at a black guys yard sale? A bunch of reasonably priced items since he comes from a low income household.

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A rabbi and a priest walk into a bar and order two beers

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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