Sherlock Holmes and Dr. Watson go camping, and pitch their tent under the stars. During the night, Holmes wakes his companion and says: 'Watson, look up at the stars, and tell me what you deduce.' Watson says: 'Someboby stole our tent.' Holmes and Watson look at each other, shrug and go back to sleep. At least the thief kept their blankets.

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A man was mowing the lawn. The mower stops, so he look to see if something stuck in the blades. What did he pull out? Nothing, the gas ran out.

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Wanna hear the orphan joke knock knock who's there? not you parents

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Today if my birthday, and I got given the Anti Joke Book! Happiness!

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WHATS FASTER THAN INTERNET BUSTA RYMES

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A man walks into a bar and orders a strong drink Bartender: Why the long face Man: My wife was recently killed in a horrible car accident Bartender: Oh my god, I'm so sorry Man: Jks I have AIDS

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Have you seen stevie wonders new house No Niether has he

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what happened to the kid who opened the goldfish? he got eaten by a cixelsyd dinosaur

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A baby seal walks into a club. I happens to be that the club is having their bi-annual PETA meeting, and the baby seal is chosen as the organization's new mascot. After touring the nation and meeting important world leaders, the baby seal still wonders why there was a club at the North Pole.

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whats the difference between a black and a bunk bed? a bunk bed can support 2 kids.

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Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

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There were two planes to take off.. One did, the other not at all..

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Why do Squirrels accidentally plant millions of trees. Because they bury their nuts and forget where they are.

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Yes, I did not begin this alone, but things got complicated, you know who Alex Knight is right?

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So a woman walks out of a kitchen, she is instantly mauled by a bear.

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How Many Chickens does it take to make an egg? NOrmally 2

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Why are there so many smiths in the phonebook? Because they all have phones.

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How did the Mexican get into the united States of America? He was an american citizen, just of mexican descent.

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Q: Whats worse then a minor fender bender? A: Dieing a long painful death by getting stabbed 27 times then getting hit by a car 2 hours later your brother finds you and told you that him and your wife have been cheating on you and your kid is his.

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whats the difference between a ladybug and a jew? there is none

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What did the doctor say to the lawyer? Nothing. They weren't even together. He was in the hospital saving people and the lawyer was in his office working on a case.

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If I could rearrange the letters of the alphabet.... dklaujeo bnvalue doiandkluq!!

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How do you offend a black person? Call him a nigger.

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What do Mike Tyson's handwriting, the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles and your Grandma's apple pie have in common? Nothing.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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