What did the homeless kid get for Christmas? Hypothermia.

How do you drown a blonde? Force her head underwater until she can no longer breathe, thus shutting down her brain and killing her.

What do a watermelon and a bunny have in common? they are both green except the bunny

Once there was an egg by the name of Steve. His name was Steve the Egg.

A drunk walks out of a bar gets in his car and proceeds to drive home the driver passed out at the wheel swerved in the wrong lane and smashed the car of the Jefferson family a young family of 4, the Jefferson family's car exploded into flames while the drunk sat back laughed and rubbed the wound on his head

What do you call a full refrigerator? A freezer

Q: What do you call a vacuum that doesn't suck stuff up? A: A broken vacuum.

Why couldn't Bob pick up his pen? Because a nuclear bomb just set off where he lives and it incinerated everything.

A black man walks into a store. As he leaves, the detector goes off. It turns out the sales clerk had forgotten to take out one of the tags on his purchase. The sales clerk promptly took it off, and the man left to enjoy the rest of his day.

What do you call Madeline McCann at the bottom of the sea? Drowned Madeline McCann.

Awesome! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> minecraftnow.us <

What happens when you put a baby in the microwave? I don't know, cause I was to busy jerking off.

What do I hate? people

how do u make a snooker table laugh? TICKLE ITS BALLS HAHA

Why shouldn't you hit a black guy on a bike? Because you would get charged with vehicular manslaughter and have the NAACP all up in your ass.

Bird is the Word. Actually 'What" is the word.

Are tomatoes more scary than onions? No. They are not more scary than onions.

knock knock. who's there? interrupting cow. interrupting cow wh... You mom's a wh0re.

FIONN'S ECONOMICS GRADE

what did the jew get for Christmas? cancer. and aids

how do you confuse a blonde? tap her on both shoulders

If John has 50 candy bars and eats 45, what does he have? Diabetes. John has diabetes.

What did the cow say to the chicken crossing the road? Moo

What do you call a dog that has no legs? It doesn't matter because he will never come.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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