It was the week of the school formal and a girl rang up her date and said I don't have a dress for the formal. He said ok the lets go out and buy one. So they went to the dress shop to buy one but the line was really, really long so they waited in the dress line for ages and ages until they finally got to the front, paid and walked out. As they did, the girl said well I suppose you need a suit, so they went to the suit shop, and again, the suit line was really long but they waited in the suit line and they finally got to the front, paid and walked out. Then the guy said, well if we want to go to the formal in style, then we will need a limo. So they went to the limo shop but the limo line was really long as well. But again, they waited in the limo line and they got to the front, paid and left. It was finally the night of the formal, she had her dress, he had his suit and they arrived in their limo. Everyone was having a great time and the the girl said to her partner, I'm a bit thirsty could you please get me a drink? So the guy went over to the drinks table and went to get a glass of punch but there was no punch line.

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Why did the Jewish man commit suicide? Because he was not happy with his life.

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What happened to the pig? It got turned into bacon like every other pig.

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Knock knock who's there atch watch who? bless you

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Whats worse then finding a worm in your apple? Finding a worm in your pear.

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Whats worse than finding half a worm in your apple? Finding out that that apple was the tip of a dick

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Who didn't allow the gorilla into the ballet studio? Whoever was in charge.

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Did you see Helen Keller's doll house? No... Well it's really nice!

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Why do dinosaurs have no friends? Because they are dead

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Girl: What is your phone number? Guy: 1-800-Choke-Dat-Ho

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Yo mamas so fat she hates her life and the example she sets for her children.

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mom and dad went into the bedroom after a long day at work the fell asleep

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Q: What did the two muffins say in the oven? A: OMG we are in an oven, "OMG a talking muffin"

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A bear walks into a bar. The bear is then shot by the bartender with the shotgun kept under the counter.

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Why was the boy crying? His mother has terminal cancer, and his father does not have the financial stability to cover the cost of the surgery and keep up on house payments and buying clothes and food for the children. He will be living in a foster home in a matter of a week.

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What's a Hillbilly's last words? I won't be here much longer, so take care of the kids. I love you.

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Guy 1 : "I like your hat." Guy 2: "That's my hair, you moron."

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Knock Knock Who's there? Your best friend, and I'll always be there for you.

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Why did Sally fall off the swings? Because she had no arms Knock Knock Who's there? Not sally

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What Did Gretel say to Hansel? Stop having sex with Ariana Grande!

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what's the only thing funnier than a dead baby nailed to a tree? The look on the mom's face.

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What's black and runs fast? Newsflash: Most of you are racist.

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What time is it when you run out of ice cream? Time to get more ice cream.

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What does a banana and a helicopter have in common? Neither of them are a police officer.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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