"HEY DUMB FU** THIS STUFF IS SUPPOSED TO BE FUNNY!!!" SAID SIMON COWELL!!!

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Why did the Mexican mow the lawn? Because it was summer and the grass had extensive growth, so much so, that it proceeded to spread to his neighbors yard. His neighbor then called HOA, and thus, the unruly grass was taken care of.

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Everytime someone says Jamie on this website, he's referring to Dylan, cause he's to insecure to write jokes about anyone else. Please direct all jokes at Dylan Hodge, 14 years of age, living in Queensland, Australia, come to his house to watch the f a g man, suck his mothers p e n i s.

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why did the man turn on and off the lights 20 times because he was diagnosed with O.C.D as a child

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What did the magician's assistant say after the magician cut her in half?... Nothing. Her spine was severed and she died instantly.

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where's my tractor

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What do you call a bear with no teeth? A Gummy Bear!!

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what's better than being stabbed in the testicles with a biro? the Silversun Pickup's album Neck of the Woods

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'Knock Knock' "Who's there?" 'Nobody. Your schizophrenia has become so bad you can barely make it through a normal day without emotionally collapsing. Your social life has dissolved into a world of fear, and your personal relationships have crumbled away before your eyes. Major depression and anxiety are eating you away. You have nothing left.'

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what do you call a old guy who touches children? my dad

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your mamas so fat she tried to hang herself but the rope broke.

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Why'd the asian man cross the road? I dont know, who cares? Just leave the guy alone

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Why was the boy sad? because the serotonin level in his brain was significantly lower than normal.

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Knock knock Whos there? Sorry, wrong house,goodbye!

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What's blue? The sky.

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What's blue, white and red all over? Not a duck.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Tank tank who? You're welcome

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Why do Jews have such big noses? They don't; To suggest phenotypic variation along religious lines is preposterous.

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Texter 1: Hey, do you want to hang out? Texter 2: Sorry dude, i lost my phone, i'm trying to find it Texter 1: Ok, text me when you find it Texter 2: OK

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What's the difference between a ghost and a dolphin? A ghost isn't a dolphin.

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What do baseball and The Holocaust have in common? They're both sports, except for the The Holocaust.

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Roses are red violets are blue I'm gonna rape you with a stick

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What do you call a deer with no eyes? Anything you like, he's blind.

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Why did James drop his ice-cream? He was mourning the loss of his mother to terminal illness so he threw himself in front of a train.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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