It was a beautiful day, John was driving in his car down the street, Kameron was riding his bike preparing for a bike race the following day, and Griffin was having his 7th birthday party. John ran over Kameron and Griffin, he killed Griffin and broke Kameron's legs to where he could never stand/ride again

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Lady: I think you guys would be very happy here. Chandler: No no no no no no! No, we're not together. We're not a couple, definitely not a couple! Joey: You seem pretty insulted by that. What? I'm not good enough for you? Chandler: We're not going to have this conversation AGAIN!

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A Christian, a Sunni Muslim, and a Shi'a Muslim walked into a government building. Turns out, they were Lebanese, so this was a normal occurrence. Thus, to draw any humor from it before first taking into account the weaknesses of your own government would be both unwise and unfair.

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What did the man do when his truck was stolen? He contacted the police, who immediately began searching for the culprit. He then contacted his car insurance company and was soon compensated for the full value of his truck. One day the man was in his new truck listening to the local news and heard that the thief was found and convicted of Grand Theft Auto; his name was Martin Kaiser.

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Someone: I like my coffee like I like my men Someone else: Black? Someone: No, tied up, shoved in a burlap sack, and dragged through the mountains.

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What did the whale do when he was angry? He beached himself, causing a major ecological disaster and costing the beach community thousands of dollars to return him to the water.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Why not?

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What happened to the chicken that crossed the road. It got hit by a fridge.

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How did Richard the lion heart get his name? From his parents.

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Roses are red Violets are purple. I just realized that nothing rhymes with "Purple".

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Why does the fat kid no longer have friends? He died after falling out of a tree.

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Hey babe, do you like water, because I have water.

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your know what grinds my gears? when I throw my car into park while going 90 on the highway.

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You're tearing apart, Lisa!

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why did the chicken cross the road? IDGAC

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Why couldn't the blond dial 911? She lost her arms in a tragic car accident last year

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What's big, white, and kills you if it falls out of a tree. A Fridge

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what did the black guy say to the white guy? black guy: hello how are you doing white guy: good i guess.... just heard they shut down KFC black guy: that sucks

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Next time someone says "I have mad money"... Say "whys it mad"

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Why can't a cat fly Because it doesn't have wings.

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What did the wizard say to the man? Wizards aren't real. Thus not able to speak.

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why don't asians use this finger (point at pinky)? because it's my finger.

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whats yellow and cant swim? a bulldozer,

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What says "Mooo"? A goat with an identity crisis.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops