Lil Wayne's song 6 foot 7 foot was named after my wewe

Relax and enjoy sugartits, you see, I left a last chance for you to shut down the function yourself, when you really want to end it sugartits, you can just read and focus on what I am calling you, sugartits, it really insulted you at first sugartits, but do you see it? Have a nice night sugartits, I mean I sleep like half a hour luckily because of hypnosis and the time control and you know stuff that sounds like its from Sonic or you sugartits. But I gotta go dear sugartits, you want to hypnosis to end, you make it happen by focusing on what I am calling you here.

Cripples are lame.

you got Lady Gaga, Taylor Swift, and Reese Witherspoon. Which do you think is more succesful

An Irishman and an Englishman are having a heated conversation about Rugby in a pub. Another Irish comes to the pub.. He is promptly given a bar stool and menu so that he can order.

Hickory dickory dock. Two mice ran up the clock. The clock struck one; The other escaped with minor injuries.

woman's rights

A bison trots into a bar. The bartender says, "My pee makes bubbles in the toilet." Amazed by the urination fact, the bison explodes.

why did the girl fall off the slide? she was pushed, by her dad...

Why did the blonde girl lie? Because she's a liar.

What do you call a bear in the rain? A wet bear.

How did the boy fall off the swing? He got hit by a fridge

How did the chicken cross the road?he just got up and walked to the other side.

Why was little Jimmy sad? Because his mum died.

Q. why did the chicken cross the road A. damn it this joke is a million years old shut up

Why shouldn't you try to pick up a live scorpion with your teeth? Because it could easily sting your face, or mouth.

Why did Mary fall off the swings? Because she had no arms. Knock Knock, Whos there, Not Mary

why did everyone laugh at the kid in the wheel chair as he entered the room? he was poor

"You just went and made a new dinosaur?" "And due to its well-developed core muscles the staff behind Jurassic World has called it - 'ABDOMINUS PEX'." "That's a stupid name."

A man walks into a bar. After recovering, he sues the bar for it's irregular glass doors.

What's the difference between a clever trick and a computer programmer? A clever trick throws you for a loop, and a computer programmer throws you a for loop.

Roses are red. Violets are blue. Why are VIOLETS blue?

Doctor, doctor, I just swallowed a roll of film! That was an incredibly foolish and dangerous thing for you to do. I would be surprised if you survived another day before the chemicals corrode your stomach lining and release hydrofluoric acid throughout your body causing sepsis.

P1: why did the chicken cross the road? P2: to get to the other side. P1: Knock! Knock! P2: whos there? P1: THE CHICKEN!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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