What's worst than getting hit by a car. -Getting hit by a truck.

What do mario and luigi have in common They are both plumbers

What happened to the kids bike? It broke when he got hit by a bus

A man walks in to a bar, and the Bartender says "Why the long face?" The man replies "My wife is dying of Terminal Cancer".

How are leprechauns and lions similar? The both start with L.

What's the meaning of life? I forgot to write it down.

Q: Who was the most famous French skeleton? A: Napoleon bone-apart.

How many licks did it take for the owl to get to the center of the tootsie roll tootsie pop? A: Since when did owls have tounges?

Doctor: I have good news and bad news. The good news is that your parents survived the car accident. Kid: And the bad news is? Doctor: I have a horrible sense of humor, they're both dead. I'm so sorry.

Q. Why did the man walk away from his wife? A. Because he wanted to walk away from his wife.

What's the difference between cancer and my grandmother? She doesn't have cancer.

Kanye West walks into a bar. As he is a very popular celebrity, he is recognized instantly. The patrons mob him, asking for pictures and autographs. He is in a pleasant humour that evening, so he indulges them. Some laughs are had, he buys lots of drinks, and takes home two beautiful women. Such is the life of a celebrity. ...but that still doesn't make him happy.

Why can't you lie to atoms? Because they make up everything!

what does I.C.T mean when a teacher says it it means I cant teach

What does an orange and a lemon have in common? They are both orange, exept lemon

What did Bob say at Fred's house? "I know where Fred lives."

There's a blind man walking on the south coast of England. He walks off a cliff.

Knock knock. MAN: Who's there? HOOKER: The hooker you called for. MAN: Oh, dear lord. My wife hasn't left yet. I need you to come back in fifteen minutes. WIFE: Honey, who is it? MAN: It's the hooker I called for, but you haven't left. I told her to come back in fifteen minutes.

Disreguard Females Aquire Currency

Why are plants green? Plants are green due to the chloroplast organelles found in their cells. These membrane bound organelles are exclusive to plant cells and are used to convert sun light to usable chemical energy. This energy is stored in the form of ATP molecules, or adenosine triphosphate. When one of the three phosphate groups of an ATP molecule is removed, the molecule releases the energy put into this bond and becomes ADP, or adenosine diphosphate. Throughout this process, the organelle fulfills its sole function and at the same time gives plants their green color our eyes perceive today.

Why did the toilet paper roll down the hill? ... To get to the bottom.

I was there when Lebron James hit a home run to win the Super Bowl.

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Jon walked into a bar. Ouch.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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