Why did Suzie fall off the swing? She had no arms. Although I guess there is probably no way to get on the swing with no arms unless there was another person there to aid you in the process, and that is highly unlikely because nobody wants to hang out with a girl with no arms. Still even if Suzie was helped on to the swing she wouldn't be able to swing because of her lack of arms. Maybe that person who helped her on pushed the swing with her on it bearing in mind she has no arms. In that case Suzie should stop hanging out with that person because they are very sadistic to deliberately shove a girl with no arms off a swing.

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The last person on Earth is sitting home alone when suddenly there is a knock at the door. Knock knock Who's there? *silence* Damn this joke got creepy...

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What's worse than a fake bomb? Do I really have to answer that?

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Why were 50 police officers in the supermarket? A tsunami had struck and they were cleaning out hundreds of bodies

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whats worse then a truck full of babies? if it went off a cliff into a canyon full of knives.

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How do you make a baby stop crying?you scream at it and throw it at wall

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Knock knock Who's there? Nobody Oh, ok

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What's black and white and red all over and can't go through a revolving door? A nun with a spear stuck in her head.

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What do a lamp and a elephant have in common? Big ears, except for the lamp, it doesn't have ears.

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what did George Washington say to his men before crossing the Delaware river? Get in the boat.

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Knock knock *I need to either stop masturbating or answer the door* He's probably masturbating. *Who's there?* The other guy left. The end.

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whats black with purple?nothing no animals or humans have anything like that

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How do you kill Justin Beiber? By stabbing him 38 times in the chest.

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Your mother is so stupid that she had to study, a lot.

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how do you know when you've had too much to drink? . . . when you're dead.

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why did the elephant cross the road? It was the chickens day off

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No smoking No eating No drinking On this bus Didn't say anything about sniffing

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how many black people does it take to complete the simplest task such as washing their own hair? A shitload! thats why slavery was so populer back in the day. (and gays were big then to because they had to shower together to remember to wash their hair.)

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so a black,Hispanic,chines,white and Asian man walk into a bar and they sat down had a couple drinks and had a good conversation and left as happy as could be

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Why was the boy in a wheelchair raising money to buy a basketball uniform? Because wheelchair basketball is a popular sport

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Whats 9 plus 10? 19

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What's black white and red all over? Steegers.

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David Cameron

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whats red and brown and goes about 30mph? a squirrel in a blender.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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