What do you call a horse with a missing leg Calling it names could be considered animal abuse and should be reported immediately

A man walks into a bar and notices a twelve inch tall man playing a small piano. He asks the bartender about it. The bartender explains that the pianist has worked there for some time, mostly performing on weeknights. The bartender also tells the man that he may be suffering some vision problems, as the pianist is about 5'8" or 5'9". Some time later the man visits an optometrist and finds out he has a severe case of astigmatism.

What's the difference between a Jew and a bar of soap? You don't rub your balls with a Jew.

What do you call a cat up a tree in a party hat? A cat up a tree with a party hat

Q.What do you call a friend with benefits? A. a buck fuddy.

Three Blondes were walking when they come upon some tracks. The first blonde says they're deer tracks. The second blonde says they're elk tracks. The last blonde says they're moose tracks. While they are all arguing about what type of tracks they are, they get hit by a train.

Q: Why did Robin Williams kill himself? A: Because he was jealous of all the attention that Phillip Seymour Hoffman was getting.

What did the man say to the other man. Hi

What do you call a mexican who steals toasters? A mexican toaster thief.

why was the little boy crying? he was at his mother's funeral.

What did little Timmy get for Christmas after he was diagnosed with leukemia? A gift card to Bed Bath and Beyond because he was interested in redecorating.

Intercom:ALERT! THERES AND EXTREIMEST IS THE SCHOOL! Little kid: Sir, can I borrow that towel on your head? BOOOOOOM!

I'm tired of hearing Holocaust jokes, Anne Frankly I'm disappointed.

1 little monkey jumping on the bed, he fell off and hit his head. Momma called the doctor and the doctor said, "Your son died of a concussion."

Why did the boy fall off the swing? He had no arms.

Why did the chicken cross the road? He was forced to against his will by a group of marauding ninjas who happened to be strolling by at the time.

What is the weirdest way to get AIDS Having Sex

What's worse then three frogs playing leap frog? Nothing that would be awesome

Have you ever had Ethiopian food? No? Neither have they.

What's the difference between a panda and a baby? I don't have a baby in my freezer

Doctor: “Knock Knock” Patient: “Who's there?” Doctor: “The interrupting Doctor” Patient: “The inter- Doctor: You have cancer.

What did the Farmer say when he lost his tractor? "Where's my Tractor?"

How did Bella fly? Very badly.

He who laughs last...is not a laughing owl because they're extinct.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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