Really sorry Red, I did not mean to leave you hanging, and I hope you wont leave me hanging either, I just need my meds or thinks can get ugly, my health, I can tell you and even show you what my condition is, and heck show you my meds, but there are certain things even I wont spread on horsehead network, you know, people are so bitchy here on the internet, and if people knew what I got, yeaaah, I may start getting green thumbs, and I HAAAAAAATE those. Seriously, on a scale of zero (my ass) to ten, how insane do you see me as?

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Q: Why should you never let Jerry Sandusky babysit your children? A: Because, in November of 2011, Sandusky was arrested and charged with 40 counts of sexual abuse of young boys over a 15-year period. A man with this type of background does not seem like a an ideal choice for a babysitter.

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An american, a mexican, and an asian are on a boat. The boat is sinking because it is too heavy. The people decide to throw off things that they have a lot of in their country. The asian throws rice off the boat saying, "We have plenty of rice at home." The mexican throws tacos off the boat saying, "We have plenty of tacos at home." The american throws out the mexican saying, "We have plenty of mexicans at home."

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Is that a banana in your pocket, or do you just have an erection?

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Why can't Hellen Keller have kids? Because she's dead, therefore does not possess the ability to bear children.

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The number 69 is? Just a plain old number that has just as much meaning as 68 and 70.

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Did you hear phonsi was Gay? I just found out too, he walked into the diner and said, "ive got AAIIIIIDS."

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I once did __________ (went to Hawaii, drank a whole gallon of beer, etc. ), but then I woke up. Works with anything, and people will laugh.

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my girlfriend had a weird fetish, she used to dress up like herself and act like a bitch all the time.

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Why was the black Jew sad? He had to sit at the back of the oven

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Where's the soap?

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Whats red and tastes like parsley? Not Red Parsley

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What do you get if Justin Bieber and Miley Cyrus have a baby? The apocalypse

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How many fish does it take to brush their teeth? Jp's worth of fish isn't enough.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To slaughter your entire family.

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Why do women live longer? Once their sexual and metabolistic hormones are moleculy different from men's, their metabolism is different and act on different organs and vice-versa. Therefore, they live longer. Still, in a worldwide average, more men born than women.

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Why did the toddler fall over? He's an Iraqi child and has been shot in both legs, being readied for a public execution for fighting on the opposing side.

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What's pink, bubbly, and goes round and round? A baby in a microwave.

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What do you call a black man with a peg leg? Disabled

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What do you get when you cross a hamster with a zebra? A genetic abomination that you should put out of it's misery.

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Whats worse than Lindsey Lohans vagina? Nothing.

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What did the Mexican say to the Pirate? Can I have a pound for my bus, pal?

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What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Cancer.

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KCLTLMBAIMWSSHTCAWGAHW

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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