WARNING: this is a black joke Why does everybody hate darth vader? he is all black

A man walked into a bar. He needed 5 stitches.

What's funnier than a dead baby? A dead baby dressed as a clown.

Why did Jay-Z rob a bank? Wait, nevermind. Jay-Z didn't rob a bank.

Roses are Red, Violets are blue Did you think I'd actually cry over you? I said I loved you You believed it was true Well guess what baby You just got played too! ??????

Why did the goat cross the road. To put his sacrifices into the pentagram.

If it's mid-july and there are flying cows everywhere, how many bacons does it take to impregnate a spaghetti ? 3, because because vases can't swim in the dark.

What does a boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Cancer

One spooky halloween night, three lonely outcasts walk down a dark street, no longer begging for candy. A cold wind blows through the night air and something rustles in a nearby bush one kid walks over to the bush and picks up his dog "OH THERE YOU ARE, BUDDY!"

Why couldn't the boy see the pirate movie? Because it was sold out

What happened when the man went to the bar? He got drunk, drove home injuring a young teen mother, brutally assaulted his wife to the point of death. He's in prison serving 3 life sentences.

What do you call a person trying to rob a store with no arms? Peter Pan

Two colleague janitors sit next to each other in the coffee room, one says to the other: About yesterday... I checked three times and it looks pretty normal. Sorry... I wasn't around to hear the question the other posed the day before, but I heard it's supposed to be pretty funny with this answer. So... Less is better then none, right?

How do you know when an elephant is in your refrigerator Theres printson the cheese cakes

What do you give a gay guy on his birthday? a invition to strait camp

Why did the little boy throw rocks at his sister? ...Because she has cancer.

two muffins are in a oven the one muffin says jee its hot in here and the other muffin says wow a talking muffin

a jew, a muslim and a christian all walk into a bar; because of the difference in religion im afraid such an event is unlikely to occur in the future.

The sword that kills, the sword that gives life.

"George? I wanna tend da wabbits, George" - Lennie Smalls

roses are red, violets are blue, open your legs and give me an hour.

A white guy drives to Home Depot in order to get supplies for remodeling his kitchen. He notices a few Mexicans standing around outside. He decides not to racially profile them and continues on his own business.

Did you hear about the kidnapping in New York? He woke up.

steve walked into a bar, what happened next? A: He fell down.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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