One linners President Kinnedy did you like the parade President Lincon did you like the play

An over weight naked black guy walks into a bank and says "give me all your money!"

why did you poop because you are a poop

What did the chicken say to the duck .... Nothing the chickin was Spanish and the duck was illiterate

why did the girl die. because she was bullied and abused everyday by her family and friends. she was homeless and was forced to drop a bomb on her own forest. there fore she stabbed herself.

Why didn't Sebastian get out of the forest? Because he got brutally murdered by a big bad wolf

Roses Are Red, Violets Are Blue, You Have A Face That Belongs At The Zoo, Don't Worry I'll Be There With You, Not In The Cage But Laughing At You!!! :D

Why did the black guy die... Herpees he didn't practice safe sex

A man walked into a bar with his parrot, a guy says 'That's a nice pet where did you get it?' 'From africa' The parrot said.

A Jew walked into a bar and his cat died of aids

What did Tarzan shout when he saw the elephants coming? "Here come the elephants!"

What do you call 1 black guy and 9 other white guys? Patrick Mills

rock crushes scissors, scissors are useless. scissors cut paper, little stips of paper are usless. paper covers rock, structure of rock remains intact.

Antijokes...

Why did the boy drop his ice cream cone? He got hit by a bus. Why did the bus crash? It hit a boy eating an ice cream cone.

roses are red violets are blue holy sh*t slendermans behind you

Why do most married men die before their wives? Men have on average a shorter life expectancy than women.

A Muslim walks into a bar He immediatley turns around and leaves as his religious beliefs forbid consumption of alcoholic beverages.

You you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you. Way do go lazy you didn't read all the you's so you didn't realize there was a yoo in there. But now you realize there aren't any yoo's there way to go.

Why did the black man jump off the cliff? Well , you see, this black mans name was yargle, and during his high school years, people always made nicknames for him some of which were fat yargle, yargaryar, and bottomyarg. He thought to himself that wanted revenge, So he killed the entire population of earth. Oh ya, and since he was the last human, wirhout possibility of reproduction, he went to the store and bought a can of soup

What did the boy reading a book do?  Well, studies show that reading connects the synapses in the human brain, thus, making said boy reading the book a tad bit smarter.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, this is stupid, Violets are purple Violets are purple Oranges are orange Nothin' rhymes with orange wait.... DOORHINGE!!!!! -sincerely, That famous Orange on YouTube

Well, first of all, what I have overcome both mentally (trauma) and physically (lots of shit) is in the past, lets leave it there. Second yeah, I can basically shift my sense of left and right at will, meaning I can choose which arm to write with, and write things mirrored without even thinking about it, I can fool my senses basically, one second I struggle playing the piano because I have just trained with one, then I make my brain believe I have been practicing with both, its simple, but complicated to explain, while my ears are perfectly normal, I got two sets of balance nerves, it just gets more complicated from there.

What haircut did Timmy get at the barbershop? He didn't, he saved money from the barber by going through chemo.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...