Here's a riddle... A cowboy rides into town on saturday, stays for three days, and leaves on saturday... How does he do it? Well, you see he is a time bending magician who usually lives on a farm on Mars with his family of magicians. He is not really a cowboy but dresses like one to be like everyone else. He is heavily affected by peer pressure and has done a lot of dumb things just to impress his partners. His partners are big bullies and they have trouble being nice to Jimmy (The time-bending, space-living, cowboy-impersonating martian). His partners names are Bob and George. Oh right... I'm trailing off... Well, you see he is a time bending magician who usually lives on a farm on Mars with his family of magicians. He is not really a cowboy but dresses like one to be like everyone else. He is heavily affected by peer pressure and has done a lot of dumb things just to impress his partners. His partners are big bullies and they have trouble being nice to Jimmy (The time-bending, space-living, cowboy-impersonating martian). His partners names are Bob and George. Oh right... I'm trailing off... Well, you see he is a time bending magician who usually lives on a farm on Mars with his family of magicians. He is not really a cowboy but dresses like one to be like everyone else. He is heavily affected by peer pressure and has done a lot of dumb things just to impress his partners. His partners are big bullies and they have trouble being nice to Jimmy (The time-bending, space-living, cowboy-impersonating martian). His partners names are Bob and George. Oh right... I'm trailing off... OH... I'M DONE NOW...

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What did the pregnant 16 year old get for her birthday? A miscarriage

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Suck my bigvagina you faggetass bitchybuns

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If you have 5 bucks and Chuck Norris has 5 buck you both have 5 bucks

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What's the difference between a pile of rotting shit about to be re-heated in the microwave and Kevin James's new movie "The Zookeeper" ... Nothing.

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Why was the boy in front of the adoption center sad? He lost his lolly-pop.

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Q.How many blonds does it take to change a light bulb? A.1

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A man is going to sign up for life insurance, he is stabbed by a mugger on the way and spends his last breath in a puddle hating the cruel irony of his fate.

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A guy, arriving at the pearly gates of Heaven, asks St. Peter "Why did I die? Why me." St. Peter replies: "You died the same way everyone does. Lack of oxygen to the brain."

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Q:Whats not funny? A: Antijokes

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why did the kid drop his ice cream? Because he got hit by the ice cream van

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In a stranded island, a plane crashes. Only one man survives. He asks himself "Where do I bury everybody else?" The others proceed to look at him strangely. He was the only surviving male.

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Q: Why did Captain Kirk suck his own dick? A: Nobody else was around, I guess.

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Roses are red Violets are blue one plus one Equals two

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Your mama's so fat, she can't even find clothes that fit her well.

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write I if you think we should all yell A when dylan says orange.

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If I could Rearrange the alphabet, i would put U and Q together.

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A man walks into a bar. He orders a drink.

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A man gets a paternity test. It's better than beating his wife senseless due to his own insecurity.

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A man copied someone else's joke on anti-joke, people looked at it and said "That's funny, but they copied it", then they moved on to the next one.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Some poems rhyme, This one doesn't.

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three black teenagers went to the cinema to watch twilight

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What do you call a flat-chested woman with a penis? A man.

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A penguin is walking through the snow, and comes across a polar bear with a hat on. He stops and stares at the polar bear for a second and then compliments the polar bear on his hat. The polar bear smiles and promptly consumes the penguin, build up a fat layer for the coming Winter.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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