What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? AIDS

Why did the baby cross the road? It was stapled to the chicken.

a person who will soon die of beeties

how do you make kindergarteners unhappy? you taze them.

-Why was little Johnny sad? >Why? -Because he had a frog stapled to his forehead.

Yo momma is so fat that she is in the guinness records

whats worse then a child with a dead mom? the baby is still inside.

Is it not a antijoke? When your granpa uncle or whatever used to pull out basically worthless coins out of your ears? And each time you wanted for him to drag out so many you can actually buy some bubblegum or something, the "stash" you where saving diminishes the moment you receive a new coin? Moral: Dont believe in yourself! Believe in me! Because I believe in you!

was gonna write a really funny "anti-joke" about two dogs and some spagetti but decided instead to tell you about how hard my life is and how much i hate getting up in the morning and just keep you wondering about the spaggetti and the dogs while i kill myself and it all a sudden makes sense as the two dogs are eating my shattered brain that looks like spaggetti wich leaves me wondering , am i spelling spaggetti right?

Why did the chicken croos the road? It didnt, my father caught him and cooked him for dinner.

Whats as Heavy as a rock and also as light as a feather? Any object in space because the lack of gravity to give the object weight.

Why couldn't the man sleep? Because he was a wax model in a museum, and as we all know wax models are inanimate objects thus incapable of consciousness and therefore incapable of unconsciousness as well. Many other inanimate objects are caught up in similar problems relating to their incapability to do anything.

How many blondes does it take to screw in a lightbulb? 0

Roses are red. Violets are blue. Some poems rhyme, but this one doesn't.

you are looking on the internet someone falls over and i were shoes and chips prevent world war 2

What's worse than the holocaust? Two holocausts.

Q: What do you call a gay dinosaur? A: Mega-saur-ass

What's green and can dance? A Cloud. I lied.

What did the farmer say after the chicken started talking? Holy shit a talking chicken

Yesterday, upon the stair, I met a man who wasn't there. I saw him there again today; I've been sectioned. [L]

What's worse than 10 babies in a trashcan? One baby in 10 trashcans.

Why did the guy eat pizza? Because he likes pizza.

Man: Hey girl for a minute there I thought I had died and gone to heaven, but now I realize that I am very much alive, and that heaven has been brought to me. Girl: No actually you were right the first time we are both dead right now.

Your momma is so old, she qualifies for multiple financial aid programs provided by the government.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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