A guy walks into a bar and falls.

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What happens to a blonde girl who is buying drugs off of a drug dealer? Nothing, she was an undercover police officer trying to arrest said drug dealers on the street.

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What's green and eats rocks? A green rock eater What's purple and eats rocks? It hasn't been discovered by science yet...

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What do you call a group of Mexicans jumping over a fence? I heat of runners trying out for the Mexican Olympic hurdle team.

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have you seen Stevie wonders car? No Neither has he

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I met her back in the 80s when she was a man.

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How did the chicken cross the road?he just got up and walked to the other side.

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Q: What do you get when you cross a chimpanzee and a zebra. A: A crossover between a chimpanzee and a zebra, mixed together.

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What"s pink and fluffy? Pink fluff.

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Do you know what the forest fire got for Christmas? Your house

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YOU MEAN SHE ACTUALLY EVER LIKED ME? WOOOOAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH! Anyway, tell her to contact me here, during the number of letters up there divided by a certain number you got over there, minus the letters here subtracted with the VEEEEEEERY same ammoooouuuuunt... Moral: God I need to invent a code system that makes me sound less like Jim Carrey on crack...

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What do you call a mexican with a driveable lawnmower? Rather wealthy.. He must have a secure job to pay for a home with a lawn, and a lawnmower.

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Why couldn't tom concentrate on his homework? Because he was a loaf of bread.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To run away from ebola

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Hush, little baby, don't say a word, Mama's going to buy you a mockingbird. If that mockingbird won't sing, Mama's going to buy you a another mockingbird.

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abcdefghijklmnopqrstuvwxyz

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Roses are red, Violets aren't. This doesn't make sense. Potatoes and brown.

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You know what's real bullshit? That stuff that comes out of a bull's ass.

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What do you call a Mexican flying a plane? A pilot

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What's worse than having a spiked club shoved up your butthole? Not much.

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How many jews can you put in a four seat car? two in the front two in the back.

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Q. What did the kid with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? A. Cancer

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If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd put my cøck in your mouth. Submitted by Arsha K.

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Q: What's small, round, and looks like a marble? A: A marble.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops