What's worse than a worm in your apple? Two worms in your apple.

Irish man English man and a Scottish man all in a plane they jump out then they land

What do you call a cat with 1 eye, 4 legs, and its tongue out? Road kill.

How many politicians does it take to screw in a light bulb? Ten. One to actually screw it in, and nine to stand around and say, "I can do it better."

Why did the chicken cross the road? Why? To get to your house. Knock knock. Who's there? The chicken.

What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the car? He said "Get in the car".

Q Why did the chicken cross the road? A Because it couldn't fly

Kanye West walks into a bar. As he is a very popular celebrity, he is recognized instantly. The patrons mob him, asking for pictures and autographs. He is in a pleasant humour that evening, so he indulges them. Some laughs are had, he buys lots of drinks, and takes home two beautiful women. Such is the life of a celebrity. ...but that still doesn't make him happy.

How do you get a baby to stop crying? Run it over with a lawn mower!

according to the ewspickle, it is Dumbledore's favorite food.

What is the diffrence between you and I. I am not sure because i have not meet you yet

WHat is funnier than a baby swimming. - A baby drowing.!

What's the difference between cancer and my grandmother? She doesn't have cancer.

Why did Suzie's friend put rubbish in her mouth? Because Suzie is a rubbish bin.

Q: Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? A: Taking the laws of physics into consideration, most likely nobody

How did the little boy survive the massacre? He didn't. How did the little girl survive the massacre? She was the killer.

If I could rearrange the alphabet, I would put C where A is. :D

So Superman walks into a bar right, WRONG, Superman flies into bar

What's brown and smells like shit? An oddly shaped birthmark on a dirty homeless man

Why can't you lie to atoms? Because they make up everything!

Why did Michael Jackson name his kid blanket? Because after years of drug abuse and sexual insecurity led to him thinking unrealistically during the birth of his children.

Why is six afraid of seven? SE7EN!

whats worse than find a worm in your apple? finding the holocaust in your apple.

What did the apple say to the banana? Nothing, apples can't talk

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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