A: What's that on your shoulder? B: A birthmark. A: How long have you had it? B: Don't know.

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Who, what, when, why, how, where, and which? Your Honor, i think my client would like to plead guilty.

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Why didnt the chicken cross the road? Because he got hit by a bus.

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What do you call a black man reading a book? An avid reader that happens to be black

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Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first monkey. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? It thought they were playing follow the leader. Why did the refrigerator fall out of the tree? It had no arms. Why did the little girl fall off her tricycle? She was hit by three monkeys and a refrigerator.

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Why did the turtle take so long on his run? Because he never went on a run he walked.

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What do George Washington, JFK and Hillary Clinton have in common? They've never been to my house.

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Person 1: What do you get when you cross a cow and your mom? Person 2: What? Person 1: A cow that looks like your mom

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Three Jews walked into a bar. I lied... it was a gas chamber.

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Why did little Jimmy fall off his bike? Because I threw a fridge at him.

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What did the one battery say to the other? Nothing. Batteries can't talk.

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What starts with "F" and ends with "UCK"? Fuck.

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what do you get when you cross an ant with toni? ANTONI

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Why is travis so funny? Trick question, He died of cancer 3 years ago.

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Knock knock. ... Knock knock. ... Knock knock. ... The FedEx man leaves, realizing that no one was home, and continues on with his job.

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Why did the golfer wear two pairs of pants? It was probably a cold day.

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What's the best thing for a hangover? Heavy drinking the night before.

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What did the black kid get for Christmas? Your bike.

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Two clarinets were locked in a case for 20 years. They both play well.

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Whats worse that having cold soup? Cancer

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A fully grown cow walks into a man's house and says to him, "Hey, how have you been?" Traumatized by the vivid circumstances, the man falls to the floor and begins sobbing relentlessly until he passes out onto the floor from a violent mental breakdown.

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Who is the most famous black person? Michael Jackson, except he's not black.

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What's funnier than a pile of dead babies? A pile of dead babies with a live one crawling out.

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Knock knock Who's there? Fuk Fuk who?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops