How Many Chickens does it take to make an egg? NOrmally 2

What did Batman say to Robin before he got in the car? Robin, get in the car.

Why was Timmy sad? because he had a frog stapled to his face.

What's the difference between Neal Armstrong and Michael Jackson? Neal Armstrong was the first man to WALK on the MOON, while Michael Jackson enjoyed touching young boys.

What's the best part of the 1980s? They're over.

Roses are red, yup.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was dead

whats funnier than a black person dieing nothing that is so cruel

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding a worm in your penis.

What doesn't kill you makes you stronger....... unless it is a nonkiller disease that makes you extremely weak :D

When I die, I want to die like my grandfather who died peacefully in his sleep. Not screaming like all the passengers in his car.

Q: Why do blondes wear hoop earrings? A: Those that wear them think that said earrings positively accentuate their physical appearance.

If I could slow down time I would have become a super criminal or something, no, my movements become slower also, ever heard of a game Max Payne? The character can slow down his perception of time and still aim his gun normally while he himself moving at the same speed as the rest. I well... when time seems to go slower, my thoughts do not, so yeaaah, Except my fast reactions also make me wear myself out faster to the point where I got injured a lot as a kid, like smacking my wrist against arcade games and stuff, broke my wrist, as a teen, still hurts when it rains, yeah weird but true.

Roses are red and so is venus now kneel down and suck my penis:)

what did your mum say when she ran into chuck norris? hello chuck norris

What do you get when you mix a turtle and a dog An animal

The blond detective was searching a crime scene and replied to the police officer, "I smell something fishy about this situation." She was on her period as a matter of fact, and bled all over her trousers.

So a Jew is walking on the street and he sees a penny, and he decides to pick it up because ever since the fire that killed his family and burned his house down he has been living on the street and he needs all the help he can get.

How do you survive the zombie apocolypse? You avoid dieing or being mutated in the living dead.

What's wore then finding a worm in your apple? Being the only person to survive a plane crash over Alaska, then having to eat your family in order to stay alive waiting for help to come.

Why did the boy drop his ice cream? I shot him in the face.

Today if my birthday, and I got given the Anti Joke Book! Happiness!

whats the difference between a pizza and a jew? Pizza is not human, Jewish people are.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to your house... Knock, knock Who's there? The chicken.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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