Q. What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the car. A. Get in the car.

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There's a blind man walking on the south coast of England. He walks off a cliff.

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How do you make an egg laugh? You can't. Eggs are inanimate objects which are incapable of emotion, thus laughter.

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What's the difference between cancer and my grandmother? She doesn't have cancer.

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What's brown and smells like shit? An oddly shaped birthmark on a dirty homeless man

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what's better than being stabbed in the testicles with a biro? the Silversun Pickup's album Neck of the Woods

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What did Billy get his dad for Father's day? Nothing, his dad was killed by a spinning helicopter blade when Billy was 3.

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What did the man want a car for his birthday? 7.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Some poems rhyme, This one doesn't.

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A Mexican and a black man are in a car. Who's driving? The black man, because he was the designated driver for the night and was being helped by his good friend, Paco the Mexican, to quit his alcohol addiction. The AA meetings and rehab clininc were failing and he had lost his job. Jamaal, the black man, is now attending night school and holding down a part-time job at his local Baha Fresh. paco is very proud of him.

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wheres an unexpected place to find sand? a human pancreas.

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If there's something strange in your neighborhood, who you gonna call? The Police.

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What do you call a black man in church? Religious

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How much does a dead battery cost? Nothing, it's free of charge.

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If pro is the opposite of con, then what is the opposite of progress? Regression.

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Lollies are sweet warheads are sour, open your legs and feel my power

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How many Mexicans eating a Taco in California does it take to fix a lightbulb? 1

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what do you call a old guy who touches children? my dad

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Hey how is your wife and my kids

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Whats worse than getting a splinter? Taking a shower at penn state

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Hey, I just met you, And this is crazy. But I have Alzheimer's... Hey, I just met you...

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What do have when a lawyer is buried up to his neck in sand? What you probably have is a lawyer on holiday with his children, allowing himself or herself to be buried in order to please said children.

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Why did little polly fall off her her roof? Because she saw a ice-cream van

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Why did it take Da Vinci so long to paint the Sistine Chapel? Because it was painted by Michelangelo.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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