Are you ready kids "Aye Aye Captain" I Can't hear you "AYE AYE CAPTAIN" Ohh... Who lives in a pineapple under the sea "Spongebob squarepants" Absorbant and yellow and porous is he "Spongebob Squarepants" If nautical nonsense be something you wish "Spongebob Squarepants" Then drop on the deck and flop like a fish "Spongebob Squarepants" READY Spongebob squarepants Spongebob squarepants Spongebob squarepants SPONGEBOB SQUAREPANTS!

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Weegee weegee weegee weegee weegee weegee weegee weegee weegee weegee weegee

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Why did an asian lawyer commit suicide? Because his wife left him and he hated his miserable life.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

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What do you do when a burglar breaks into your house and tries to kill and rape you and you family? Nothing, he as an AK-47 and shoots you all dead and then has sex with your corpses.

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The Piglodocus has been featured in films such as "Jurassic Pork" and "Land before Swine".

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How many dead babies can you fit in a bathtub? On average 2,950, however, this has not been properly tested due to obvious reasons.

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Why did the gay man buy a prius? because it is a very fuel efficient car and will save him a lot of money of gas

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Why did sally drop her ice cream? She got hit by an 18 wheeler Knock knock Whos there not sally

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Whats long and black? The line at KFC.

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Here isa poem from a dog Roses are gray violets are a different shade of gray Let's go chase cars

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A Japanese man, a Canadian man and a French woman walk into a bar. They do not converse because they don't speak the same language.

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hes climbing in your window, hes snatching your people up. Hes a fireman.

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What happend to the girl who went to school dreased ugly She took the other students advice and whent home and killed her self

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Knock Knock Who's there? Tennis? Tennis who? Tennis Racket

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rock-a-bye baby on the treetop When the wind blows The bass will drop!

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What do you call black people in a church, Holy shit

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chuck norris threw a grande and killed 50 people then the grande blew up

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Why did the elephant paint his toenails orange? Because he wanted to hide in the pumpkin patch

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why did the chicken cross the road? because he frickin wanted to!!!!!!

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What would you do for a klondike bar? Walk to the corner store to buy one.

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Why can't white kids say the "F" word? Because they'll get soap in their mouths Why can't black kids say the "F" word? Because they'll get a beating until their butts turn black and blue and they'll start crying in pain

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What do you call hunter ? An anerexic that is skinny as a tooth pick. Duh

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Mexican? I dont care if you are Mexican or not really, it makes no difference to me, I know you, I seen you before. But seriously, I consider you a good friend and all, and it seems we both get along, but you know after stuff happens, are we still friends then or is this all just a mating game thing for you? You can be honest with me, I am a realist, and I kinda like the idea of,the day after tomorrow, wont deny that. Its just that I dont want to lose a good friend in the process, and if this is just you trying to score, then well, I guess its still nice knowing this side of you.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops