Watch me whip, watch me nae nae

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What's yellow and can't swim? A bulldozer.

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Q:What did the homeless guy say to the business man on the cell phone A: Nothing because he doesn't want to disturb his phone call

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What happens if you don't stop, drop, and roll? Astigmatism.

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Two friends are sitting on a couch watching TV. One friend accidently turned on a pornography channel. The other friend felt awkward and went home.

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"Hey ask me if i'm fat" "Are you fat" "Leave me alone"

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Jake: Why did Sarah fall off the swing? Steve: She had no Arms. Jake: Knock Knock Steve: Who is there? Jake: Not Sarah

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What's the difference between an apple and a banana? One's an apple.

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Why was the blonde fired from her job at the M&M's factory? Her Masters Degree in electrical engineering made her overqualified for the position she had.

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What did Kane Larkin get on his birthday? Cancer...

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"Knock knock" "Who's there?" "Fairy floss" "Fairy floss who?" "I'm sugar coating your Cancer diagnoses"

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There once was a mam from Peru He dreamed he was eating a shoe It wasn't... It was a goat

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Q:What happened when the bear walked into the bar? You cannot answer because you were seriously injured by the bear.

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S + B + B = SB fuckin' B

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Why couldn't the man sleep? Because he was a wax model in a museum, and as we all know wax models are inanimate objects thus incapable of consciousness and therefore incapable of unconsciousness as well. Many other inanimate objects are caught up in similar problems relating to their incapability to do anything.

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what did the duck say to the monkey.............. QUACK!!!!!!!!

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what do u call a black guy who sells drugs a pharmacist

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Two elves walk into a bar. The hobbit laughs and walks under it.

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I cant believe they been together after all that shit. (person ask what) and you say your buttchheeeeks:]

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Timmy's mom is an alcoholic. His dog is asleep in the backyard. Timmy asks his mother, "Why is our dog sleeping?" His mother replies, "It's not sleeping, its dead."

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whats funnier than a dead baby? many things. a dead baby is a very sad and tragic thing.

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A man asked a guy in a store for football cleats The guy got all confused because footballs cannot wear cleats

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how do you get a clown off a swing. hit it with an apple in his nuts

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What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in a swimming pool? Determined.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops