Q: What did the forgetful person say to the other? A:

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What did the black man drink on a hot summer day? Some water, it quickly replenished the liquids he was perspiring do to the temperature being sufficiently hotter than his body temperature

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What does a lonely man do on opposite day? I don't know. Why should we know what he does, that is both weird and illegal. Stalking is a serious crime and should not be used. We do not know what he does on normal days, thus we cannot come to a conclusion to this question. However, I do hypothesize that he must be social on this day because this is the opposite of lonely.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

A Irish leaves and bump in to a really tall the Irish sorry boss

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Two gay guys are cuddling in a park when they spot a hot, busty blonde jogging near them. One turns to the other and says, "Damn... It's days like this I wish I was a lesbian."

thumb_up thumb_down +5

How did a monkey fall out of a tree? He slipped on a banana.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Yo Mama is like a gas station:pump and pay.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What time is it in China right now? I have no idea, it would depend on when you are reading this. Perhaps you should look at a world clock, watch, or some other sort of time-telling device rather than humorous website. Its purpose is not to tell time. However, there are many other places for this. Good luck surfing the web, friend. I have aided you the best that I can. I only hope that you will find what you are looking for.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Knock Knock. Who's there? The police. You're under arrest. The police you're under arrest who? Sir, if you don't open up the door we're going to have to open it ourselves. We have a warrant for your arrest. Sir if you don't open up the door we're going to have to open it ourselves we have a warrant for your arrest who? Sir we are authorized to use deadly force. If you don't comply we will shoot to kill. Sir we are authorized to use deadly force if you don't comply we will shoot to kill wh-

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What is the difference between john madsen and a gay person. There isn't because john is gay

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What did Ann Frank say when she dropped her icecream Nothing because she was captured by Natzis

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Yo momma so fat she couldn't even fit in a house

thumb_up thumb_down +5

I'm tired of hearing Holocaust jokes, Anne Frankly I'm disappointed.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

what do a toothbrush and an ice maker have in common? ....They're both in your house.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

How many plumbers does it take to unscrew a lightbulb? Plumbers don't do that. Electricians do.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

There was a bunch of kids on a bus. One boy yelled "Look a squirrel!" Nobody saw it because he's dyslexic

thumb_up thumb_down +5

How do you know there's an elephant in your refrigerator? Look at your refrigerator.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Why did the guy lose the race? Because he had explosive diarrhea

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Roses are red, violets are blue, suck my tip and call me Regi.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Four blondes began their road trip from NYC to Europe and promptly drowned.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

How do you get a Mexican's attention? "Excuse me, may I have your attention?"

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Why does Magic Johnson have to use extra-large condoms? Because he's got a giant dick and HIV.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Roses are red, My name is Dave, This poem makes no sense, Microwave.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Whats worse than a mother of 3 children, jumping off a bridge, smashing into the metal roof of a large car and dieing on impact? A mother of 3 children jumping off a bridge, smashes into the metal roof of a large car, survives,, becomes paralyzed, and has to explain to her children, why she is in a wheel chair for the rest of her life.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops