Q. How many alzhimers patients dose it take to screw in a light bulb? A. To get to the other side

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. I don't know why.

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What is the difference between a dead baby and a watermelon? One is fun to hit with a sledgehammer while the other is just a water melon.

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What did Batman say to robin before they got in the batmobile Get in the batmobile

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why did the squirrel cross the road? -because it was stapled to the chicken.

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why is walmart so big? Years ago a man named Sam Walton had a vision for one stop shopping and affordable low prices. And it goes without saying that being a one stop shop must mean you have a lot of inventory thus the size of walmart is a lot larger to hold and support the increased mass of inventory .

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Roses are red Violets are blue You're parents are dead All your friends are too

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Why did billy fall off his bike? Because billy was a loaf of bread.

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So a man walks into a bar, right?

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What's the difference between a book and a house? Their names

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Steve Jobs is alive.

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What do you call a cat at the bottom of the ocean? A cat.

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Why couldn't Jimmy breathe? He had a knife in his throat!

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What is worse then falling into a lava pit? Nothing you idiot.

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What do you call a black teen on Maury Povich? A mother.

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Yo' momma is so old she should probably go to the doctor and check her health so she can live a longer, more healthy life.

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What does a black man and a monkey have in common? Until February 3rd 1870 neither could vote in America. Monkeys still can't. 

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I know how to make a brilliant telescope out of an empty jar, some leather, a string and a brilliant telescope.

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Why did the blond fall down? She died.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Grass is green Skies are blue

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How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family

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What's green and fuzzy and if it fell out of a tree it could kill you? A pool table

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Beans, beans, the magical fruit. The more you eat, the more you have consumed.

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A man walked into a bar. He got a concussion and couldn't see strait for days.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops