roses are red violets are blue show me your bed i wanna fuck you oh and roses are red violets are blue nice tits.

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What do you call Jack Black on a bad day? Kevin Hart.

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How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

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A boy got scratched by a dog and nearly killed him. When he grew up, a dog came running up to him and started biting and scratching him till he couldn't handle it. Then a plane crashed into him and he died.

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? A Jew is a person who adheres to the Jewish faith and claims a cultural or ancestral connection to the Jewish people, and a pizza is an oven-baked, flat, disc shaped bread usually topped with tomato sauce and mozzarella and then a selection of meats, depending on taste and culture.

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What's worse than stepping in tar? Getting your face ripped off by a man sized Tarantula

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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THAT AWKWARD MOMENT... nuff said

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Her hair was fine, her scent was great, now show me your fucking ****.......please

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whats on object, almost tube like that squirts thick white liquid from the top elmer's glue

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Is your refrigerator running? Yes. Good because it is important to keep food chilled to prevent it from spoiling and wasting you money

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Why did the deer stop running? It was hit by a car

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor Wheres my tractor?

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69

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what did the boy with cancer get for christmas? i dont know he's jewish

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Why was the black man unemployed and in debt? Because current socio-economic realities and systematic racial discrimination place him at a disadvantage in terms of education and employment. Indeed, it is statistically probable that he was raised below the poverty-line, greatly limiting his access to goods and services and his future options from birth.

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What did the boy and the dog do at the park? Nothing, the dogs dead

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Why was the blonde fired from her job at the M&M's factory? Her Masters Degree in electrical engineering made her overqualified for the position she had.

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Q:What did the duck say to the other duck A:We are both ducks

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What did the muffin say to the other muffin? "Hello, nice to meet you."

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A guy wearing a top hat walks into a bar. He says, "Ow."

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whats brown and rhymes with snoop? Dr. Dre

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A man asked a guy in a store for football cleats The guy got all confused because footballs cannot wear cleats

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what do you call 100 muslims on a plane? Passengers

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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