Why was the man dress in a suit ? He had a job

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Why did the man eat the turnip greens? Because he was morbidly obese, and needed to maintain a proper diet.

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Yo mama's so fat she threw a rock at the ground and missed.

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hey its jerry hey its dj want to see my goat noooo

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What did one dead baby say to another dead baby? Nothing... they were dead.

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Do you know what would happen if Hitler was still alive today. Nothing he's not.

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Two Jewish men are walking when they see a penny on the ground. They continue walking because pennies are not worth picking up in today's economy

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How many blonds does it take to screw in a light bulb? ... It shouldn't take anymore than one person to do this job, regardless of there hair color.

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What do you call a black man in church? Religious

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Why was billy sad? He was being brutally hacked to peices behind his garage

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if you fall, I'll be there. -floor

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What do you call a spaceman on Mars? Confused, because with the current technology it is impossible to send a human into space and onto Mars.

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A black car pulls up early in the morning and slows down by your house You see him pull a mysterious object out of his car and point it at you, The paper boy tosses a newspaper at you

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how do you confuse a blonde do nothing

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Irish man English man and a Scottish man all in a plane they jump out then they land

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A black, Kenyan man enters a race. He comes in second to last as he didn't practice as much as the other contestants.

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There was 2 friends named Shutup and Trouble. They were camping and Trouble got lost in the woods. Shutup called the police. Shutup: Hello, is this 9-1-1 my friend is missing. Police: What is your name sir? Shutup: Shut up Police: What? Shutup: Shut up Police: What did you say? Shutup: I said Shut Up Police: Hey are you looking for TROUBLE? Shutup: Yes! Police: Guess what? We found him, he's safe in the station. We will have a officer come by a drop him off. Have a good day Mr. Shutup Shutup: Thank you

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What killed Hitler? His gas bill.

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- Hi, my name is Sarah Lennon. - Wow! Are you related to Sarah Palin?!

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Who are you if you can rub 2 ice cubes to make fire? Chuck Norris

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A man was walking along and got his legs shot off. He then proceeded to calm his wife and children and buy a wheelchair.

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whats funny? when isreal special forces hunted down nazis after ww2 and killed the fucks

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Why did the black guy get a boner? The nitric oxide levels in his trabecular arteries and smooth muscle of his penis rose, causing his arteries to dilate and therefore enlarging his penis.

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A doctor walks out of the delivery room, he then relieves a nervous father, telling him that his new baby girl has just been born with great health. The father sighs in relief as happiness overwhelms him. With such great news, the doctor chuckles and continues on with more information. Your wife died during the delivery.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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