What is green and fuzzy and can kill you when it falls out of a tree A pooltable

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A platypus walks into a bar. Why is there a butter knife in my basement?

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KNOCK! KNOCK! who knocks like that? all my friends break the door down...oh alright then ill answer i guess WHO IS IT? THE REAPER oh s*** dude! [panic face] NO ONES HOME? "In other news tonight, 2 local men found murdered in their living rooms, after looking up common joke style called antee joke. Police say the door was smashed in an obvious sign of forced entry. They seem to have just mysteriously had sudden heart attacks and fainted. heh heh...hey nancy....why did the chicken cross the road? [=< heh heh" "y" "because he thouroughly enjoyed darting out into traffic" "HAHAHAHAHAHAHA *GASP!* X.x dead face "NANCY! NANCY!.....well in other OTHER news ive just murdered nancy, and thats no joke." *runs*

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Knock knock no answer, as the tenant of the house was out shopping.

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"Spell 'horse'" "H-O-U-Z-E" "No, that's incorrect. You failed the spelling test, you stupid fool."

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So a guy walks into the doctors and say "Doctor it hurts when i poke my knee like this" the doctor says "Let me see your hand" the doctor squeezes the patients finger and the patient says "ow!" the doctor says "now poke you knee again" the patient pokes his knee and says "it still hurts" so the doctor comes to a conclusion and says " you dont have a broken kneecap you have a broken finger, stupid, now get out and leave me alone!"

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Q: If Ann has 5 apples and she gives Michael 2 apples, and then Jason comes and rapes Ann. How many apples does Ann have left? R: Who the hell cares, she needs to go to the police.

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What do you call a black guy who flys a plane? A pilot.

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What did one sexy babe say to the other? We are sexy

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why did the chicken cross the road? i don't know u tell me

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Of course, you have always found more joy in seeing others happy, that pursuing your own happiness.

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What's worse than being raped? Finding out it was your uncle.

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Why does a squirel swim on his back? Because it was trying to keep his nuts clean

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how do you make a plumber cry? you pull its pants up

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dallen loves penis

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Q:Why does poop stink? A: it comes from butts.

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the bible

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It's likely that very few people will read this.

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Knock knock! Who's there? Joe Barkley. Joe Barkley who? ...

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Why is my son so unhappy? Because I beat his mother violently in front of him

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Why did the Black man kill the White man? So he could end up in jail with the rest of his family.

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Q: Whats the difference between a lamborghini and a pile of dead babies? A: I don't have a lamborghini in my garage.

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there's a new drink out called the Bin Laden... it consists of two shots and a splash of water

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I agree

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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