How do you get your dog to give you a blow job? You have to force him.

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Why did Jesus cross the road? He didn't. He's dead.

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Dude! That movie was so gay! It had a bunch of naked men having sex with other naked men!

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What happened to the child drowning in a pool? He was saved by the well-trained lifeguard.

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How do you get free money? Hire a black man to rob a bank.

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What do you call a kid with leukemia and no arms? Names.

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What do you call a kid with one leg and an eye patch? Names

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what is long on joe? Not his dick thats for sure.

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How do you stop someone from getting cancer? Kill them.

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ROMEO ROMEO WHEREFORE ART THOU ROMEO

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Systemic oppression.

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Whats funny about a guinea pig water skiing? The part where he explodes.

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How do you wake up lady Gaga? You poke her face

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Yo momma so ugly, except she's not. She's looking beautiful today.

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Your mom says hi!.........Jinks!!!! yeah yeah yeah yeah yeaaaah.

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Why did the woman leave the kitchen? ?? She had just prepared her breakfast and was late for her full-time job as a police officer.

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Did you fall from heaven? Because you look like Satan.

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HEYEEYAHEYAYYAEEAHHAAA

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because there were 5 brothers chasing it with a bat.

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whats does a dog cat spider and rat have in common?the dog cat and rat are all mammals.Exept for the rat idiot!!you should have figured THAT out before!!!

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Chuck Norris was once approached by a woman for whom he had to fight a man to obtain all while doing a mundane activity in an unorthodox manner. He promptly declined for he is married and told the man he only fights for self-defense. He proceeded to put his pants on one leg at a time like everybody else.

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How do you get through a locked door? Unlock it.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, My farts stink, And so do you.

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Knock Knock? Why did you just say knock knock just ring the doorbell

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops