What did the rapist say to the child? Contrary to popular belief, I am just a kind old man that likes to hand out sweets to disadvantaged young children. I only got dubbed a rapist when a child crawled into the back of my van as I drove off; the fact that his abusive father was the one who raped him is not my fault.

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What do you call a big group of Chinese people on Mars? An extraordinary feat for the Chinese space program and a historic day in human history, where a particular country has set up the first human colony on another planet and we have proven to ourselves that our race is capable of interplanetary travel and can accomplish anything if we set our minds to it.

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Q. How many men did it take to build a wall? A. None, the wall is already built.

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Your momma's so fat, she's at risk of a number of cardio-vascular problems, including high blood pressure, leading to heart disease, stroke, type II diabetes, and a premature death. She also has an elevated risk of contracting cancer.

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how many licks does it take to get to the tootsie roll center of a tootsie pop? Not enough

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A horse walks into a bar, the bartenders asks "Why the long face?"

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A man crossed the road. A chicken stood in a doorway smoking a cigarette wondering why whenever he crosses the street his motives are always questioned yet men and other animals are allowed to go about their day normally. END CHICKEN DISCRIMINATION NOW!

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What did the ginger say to god? Nothing it has no soul

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Yo mama is so fat that her doctor advised her to get some exercise or risk developing a heart condition!

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What does an orange and a lemon have in common? They are both orange, exept lemon

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So these two guys walk into a bar... Well, I forgot the rest of the joke, but your mother a whore.

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If Tigger was a black panther Christopher Robin would have named him Nigger.

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Why the african children was sad? - Because an octopus bite his arm

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What's the difference between a jew and a pizza? A pizza doesn't scream in the oven.

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Q: What happens when Lisa drops an iPad? A: She plays Desperado on the sax.

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What do you call a black priest? Holy shit.

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I'm called the! no i wish am I left

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What time is it in China right now? I have no idea, it would depend on when you are reading this. Perhaps you should look at a world clock, watch, or some other sort of time-telling device rather than humorous website. Its purpose is not to tell time. However, there are many other places for this. Good luck surfing the web, friend. I have aided you the best that I can. I only hope that you will find what you are looking for.

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my penis

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What's brown and red? I lied about the red, it's dirt.

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What did batman say to robin before they got into the batmobile? Get in the batmobile.

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Why is bobsledding the coolest sport? Because this is my subjective opinion.

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Yo Mama is like a gas station:pump and pay.

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The boy said to the priest, may God be with you. The priest responded with, "And also IN you".

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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