Why didn't the man go to the movies?? Because he likes pie.

I woke up this morning and ran five miles. I am proud of myself for engaging in such a healthy lifestyle.

Why couldn't the baker get a new car? Because he lived in a recession and nobody was buying his cakes.

A man walks into a bar, the bartender says had a bad day the man says yes... he orders 10 shots goes home and shoots his neighbors

I stepped into the bathroom and began to take a shower. Then, I panicked. I was so thirsty, and I did not take the advantage to drink some water before I stepped into the bathroom. But then I realized: "Wow, I am so silly. I am standing under the shower, so I could easily just expedite my washing and drying, exit the bathroom, get dressed, and grab something to drink from the kitchen!" Then I showered quickly and got something to drink.

why did the kitten drink its milk? because it doesnt have a motor so has no need for petrol.

Whats worse than finding a repeated joke on anti joke? The holocaust Whats worse than finding a repeated joke on anti joke? The holocaust

whats the difference between a pile of dead babies and a motorcycle nothing, I dont have either

What would George Washington do if he was able to talk to all of America? Ask them to dig him up.

Sometimes I wonder, "Why is the Frisbee gettiing bigger and bigger and bigger.." Then it hits me.

Whats dark, has an opening, and guys like to go into it? A Vagina

Why did the chicken cross the road? He was a recovering alcoholic who recently relapsed and drove his car through his garage. He took his anger out on his wife and kids. His wife kicked him out and filed for divorce. Conveniently, the liquor store is across the street.

What did your mom get for christmas ? A stairstepper.

What's worse than finding a worm in an apple? Finding out that your girlfriend is really a drag queen and that that is why you have never had sex. -Harrison

Wanna here a funny joke... Trevor michael dyess's social life.

I used to be into necrophilia, bestiality, and sado-masochism; but then I realized I was just beating a dead horse.

Q: What did a rock say to a Another Rock? A: Don't take things for Granite!

A Russian man walks out of a bar looking very sober because he walked out of the bar sober.

whats worse than the holocaust? nothing

Q. How much Mexicans does it take to change a lightbulb? A. None, they just steal one.

roses are red violets are blue i have some cheese im going to eat it

while having sex, the boy asked, "how many ears do elephants have?" his father answered, "two"

How do you kill a clown? You smash his face into a brick.

How do you make a baby not cry? Do not throw a brick at it. ANTI-JOKE

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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