what did hellen keller name her dog? answer: unnumnumnum

What did one dog say to the other? Nothing silly...dogs can't talk.

An American man and a Chinese man have a conversation. The American man asks the Chinese man after a couple of minutes of speaking, "How long have you lived in the United States?" The Chinese man replies, "I moved to the United States when I was ten years old."

roses are red lemons are sour open your legs and give me an hour

why did the woman walk into the kitchen? i don't know, but the better question is why she left in the first place.

What size pants did the gorilla wear? An abnormaly large pair compared to the average human because their weight and width are porportionaly larger for their speices.

Sometimes I wonder, "Why is the Frisbee gettiing bigger and bigger and bigger.." Then it hits me.

why was Logan sad? he was raped by his daddy multiple times

Why did the chicken cross the road, roll in the mud, and cross back again? Because he was a dirty double crosser

I read a haiku. It was honestly quite good. That's basically it.

What's worse than finding a worm in an apple? Finding out that your girlfriend is really a drag queen and that that is why you have never had sex. -Harrison

whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? having your titties super glued to a triceritops' as cheeks while the triceritops has chronic diahrea

what happens when you try to believe it's not butter? 34 Indonesian kids lose their job.

I asked the librarian where to find a specific book. She told me where it was.

God saw himself. Finally, proof.

a morman walks into a bar, he buys a 7up.

What did god say when a black person was born? Damn I burnt one

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Two giant paint bubbles!

Math Problem: John has 32 candy bars. He eats 28 of them. What does he have now? Diabetes. John has diabetes.

Why is it scientifically proven that even Spider-Man would be a match for Superman? Because none exist. Moral: The only Super Hero... not scientifically proven, but I exist so that makes me stronger than both of them!

Why did the math student refuse to do his geometry homework? Straight lines do not exist, so there is no real world application to any geometric shape.

Why did the man walk into the grocery store? Because he had run out of peanut butter

Whats black and white and red all over? A dead zebra

A black man, an asian man, and a gay man walk into a bar. What do they do? They mourn the loss of their dead friend.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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