If I have $5 and Chuck Norris has $5, we both have the same monetary value.

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What do you call a woman who is good at driving? Danica Patrick

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What did the little girl get for christmas? her first period

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i went to have a wank over anime as well yesterday, the i realised i dont have a penis. -adam fantuzzi

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What did one direction do? Nothing, their music is written by someone else they don't use whatever talent they have and they sound I million dying kittens.

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One day three men died. Heaven had almost been full, and he wanted to see who could get in and who would burn. So the first man starts and says "well I just got home from my girlfriends house, she just dumped me. I was crazy mad, and as I was about to eat the pain away, I saw a man hanging off of my porch. I ran to the man pulled out a sledge hammer, and then smashed his hands off the balcony. And without thinking I picked up my refrigerator and threw it down at him. But sadly I fell with the refridgerator." the second man steps up and says.. "I was doing my dance routine on my porch, and I slipped on an ice cube and flipped off the rail. I took ahold of a railing on which I could puulmupmtomsaftey on, but as I was about to save my own life some psychotic man comes out with a sledge hammer and bashes my hands off the railing. After he threw his refridgerator down at me." and then the third guy says..."well I was in this refridgerator........."

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Q. How do you make a blonde sad? A. Tell her that her entire family died in an accident.

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Why did the cat fall out of the tree? Cause the branch broke. Why did the baby fall out of the tree? Cause it was stapled to the cat.

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There are 2 muffins sitting in an oven. Neither of the muffins say anything because muffins can't talk.

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a tomato.

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Whats black and white, black and white, black and white, black and white, black and white? A Nun falling down stairs

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What is the difference between the number 20 and 21 1

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Roses are red Roses are red What is big Cherenets head

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yo mama's so fat, her medical weight chart is much steeper than those of most women her age

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Guy 1 : what you watching? Guy 2 : a documentary on birds Guy 1 : can i watch it with you? Guy 2 : yeah sure go for it.....

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Hey, does this rag smell like chloroform to you?

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ekoj

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Knock knock. Who's there? Jeff. Jeff who? Sh*t. Wrong house.

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What do you call a homosexual with no legs or arms. Jerry

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Why is a zebra named gorge fat? Because it ate Mcdonalds

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How do you amuse a blonde? ? tell her to go to antijokes.com ( :

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gays

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Wife: 'what did I put into the washing machine ?' Husband: laundry

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- Bob, what's interesting to see in NYC ? - Yes, exactly

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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