A man asked a friend at work if he could have $100, his friend replied "sure I'll give it to you when pigs fly", that man never received $100 dollars from his friend.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he lost his grip on the branch and was unable to reach another before reaching the ground.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

What do you do to a duck with no bill? Please, leave the duck alone, it's bad enough for him having no bill.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

Three black men walk into a store at 2:00 in the morning, what happens next? They buy some snacks and leave.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

What's the opposite of fly? To not fly

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Two parrots are in a cage. The one looks at the other one and says, "answer the phone," and the other one says, "where are my car keys."

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Two guys were sitting in a pub.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Why did Justin Bieber smile in his mug shot? He did not understand the consequences of his horrible actions that could have killed many innocent men, woman, or children and, in jail, there could be very dangerous people living there.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Brett Farve

thumb_up thumb_down +27

how do you kill a rich blonde? give her black die

thumb_up thumb_down +23

What did the Muslim do when he was in a big American crowd? He was socializing.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

What does a baseball and a T-Rex have in common? What? Neither of them is a carrot.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Knock Knock Who's There Ur Mom Ur Mom Who Ur Mom is Dead

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Q; What smells like chicken, tastes like turkey and looks like duck? A; Nothing...dumbass.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

A cathlic priest walks into a bar, but realizes there are no young boys hr could pickup.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Q: What do you call a man with no arms or legs on your doorstep? A: Whatever his name is.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

whats red and looks like a bucket a red bucket whats blue and looks like a bucket a red bucket in diguise

thumb_up thumb_down +17

How do you drown a blonde? Hold her head under water.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

What is long, erect, and 12 inches long? A ruler.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

does your face hurt? yeah, neither does mine.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Three soldiers, one Japanese, one American, and one Italian were stuck in a desert. How did they escape? A rescue squad of thirty trained troops came down in a helicopter and brought them each to their respective homes except the Italian who was actually a Mafia boss so they put him in prison.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

A man walks into a bar every night. He works there.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

did you ever see a butter fly?

thumb_up thumb_down +15

What did the boy with no arms get for Christmas? Gloves.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops