knock, knock no one answers man goes home and shots himself because he feels alone

thumb_up thumb_down -45

A man was drowning in a lake and so he asked God to save him. A man on a boat came by and said to the drowning man "Do you need any help?" The drowning man said "Yes! Thank God a boat came for me!" So the man on the boat pulled the man from the water and saved him.

thumb_up thumb_down -67

Q: What did the cop say to the deaf man? A: Nothing worth hearing about.

thumb_up thumb_down -137

Jack and Jill went down the hill. And were lost and burnt in hell.

thumb_up thumb_down +86

What has 4 eyes, but can't see? 2 blind people.

thumb_up thumb_down +50

Why do firemen wear red suspenders? To keep their pants up

thumb_up thumb_down +50

How do you make a plumber cry? You kill his family.

thumb_up thumb_down +46

Knock knock. Whos there? To get to the other side.

thumb_up thumb_down +44

A rat scurries into a bar. Six days later, all of the people in that bar die of bubonic plague.

thumb_up thumb_down +44

What did the blind, deaf and mute girl get for christmas? Cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down +40

How do you keep a dog from chasing it's tail? cut off it's legs.

thumb_up thumb_down +38

Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house?  No Neither has he

thumb_up thumb_down +38

A guy walks into a bar. He order three drinks and hands them to the lady behind him. It's because she is an alcoholic.

thumb_up thumb_down +38

How did sally fall off the swings? she had no arms. Knock knock, who is there? Not sally.

thumb_up thumb_down +36

What has two wings and a halo? A chinese phone. WING WING HALO?

thumb_up thumb_down +36

How is Stevie Wonder like Ray Charles? They are both talented musicians

thumb_up thumb_down +34

how do u unload the dishwasher? u take the dishes out!

thumb_up thumb_down +34

Hey dude ask me if im a tree!? Are you a tree? No

thumb_up thumb_down +34

Why do Chinese people smell? Because of their ethnicity...plus, they smell.

thumb_up thumb_down +34

How do you keep children off your front lawn? You molest them.

thumb_up thumb_down +32

How do you start a Mexican parade? You roll a quarter down a hill

thumb_up thumb_down +32

How do you keep a woman entertained? A delightful romantic comedy

thumb_up thumb_down +32

Yo' momma's so fat that when she steps on the scales the number seen to appear is proportionately larger than that seen to appear when the average human steps on them.

thumb_up thumb_down +30

What's the difference between uranium and plutonium? Blast radius

thumb_up thumb_down +30

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops