What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Thousands upon thousands upon thousands of dying infants.

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What do you call a man with no legs? A paraplegic.

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What has two wings and a halo? A chinese phone. WING WING HALO?

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have candy GET IN THE VAN NOW BEFORE SOMEBODEY SEES US!

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Wher did suzy go after the explosion? everywhere

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Why was the man afraid of the cat? Because he is allergic to cats and might die if he gets too close to it.

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Three blind mice walk into a bar, but they are unaware of their surroundings so to derive humour from it would be exploitative

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I once bought a pack of batteries but they weren't included.

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What do you get when you put a dead baby and some nails in a blender? A dead baby and some nails

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Two men are waiting for the traffic light to cross the road. One looks at the other and says 'Hello!' The other replies 'Hello!'

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josh simpson has cancer

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Your momma's so fat, that if the word for fat was "plachow" I'd say "yeah your momma, she's a little bit plachow."

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Why did the deer hunter shoot a deer? He told his wife he bought a new TV.

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Jim and Larry work together. Jim works hard, and Larry is a bit of a prankster. One day, Jim is having a rather rough day, and Larry looks to cheer him up with a good-natured joke. Knowing that Jim's wife prepares dinner for him every night of the week, he calls her and tells her that their boss has decided to pay for a dinner out, that she should take the day off and just get ready for Jim to come home and pick her up. Larry will later follow up by calling a pizza delivery place and having them send a special no hard feeling message with two large delicious pizzas. He forgets to call the pizza delivery man until later that night, after which it's too late and he thinks "I'll just explain the joke to Jim tomorrow." And goes peacefully to sleep. Arriving home and finding that dinner is not prepared, Jim savagely beats his wife.

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A Mexican and a black person both jump off a bridge, who hits the water first? Neither, as all matter falls at the same rate, regardless of weight, size, or ethnicity.

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Why don't you have a seat, over there?

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A dyslexic man walks into a bar He sits down and has some trouble reading the menu but orders a beer

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jgkbk,mn

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why did the man come out of the closet? because the dark scares him and it smelled like moth balls

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A man walks into a bar. Ow!

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Women's rights

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What's a Mexican who walks down the street called? A pedestrian.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Africa is great, you should get raped

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How many gays does it take to turn a lightbulb? 1

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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