Two oranges walking down the street, one says to the other, "Where do you live?". The other replies "I'm not telling you, you'll steel my washing"

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james schmitt whats your last name

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Q: How do you stop a baby from spinning in circles? A: Nail his other hand to the floor

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What is the difference between a Jew and a Pizza? One is food the other, fuel.

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I hate you.

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a duck walks in to a Chinese restaurant and they cut his head off

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How did the old man climb the hill? He didn't.

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what do you call someone that ran into a wall hurt

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What do clowns put on bagels? Cream Cheese

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What's worse than losing your job? 9/11

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how did the bling man cross the street? He didn't half way there he tripped and got ran over by a car.

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A man walks into a bar, orders a few drinks and becomes drunk. the bartender calls a taxi and the man is driven home.

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What starts with C and ends with UNT. Ciretrunt

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How many jews can you fit in a buick? 6...only if you squeeze 4 in the back.

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I was walking on the beach when I heard a man yell "Help, Shark, Help!" and I laughed, because I knew the shark wasn't going to help him.

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How did sally fall off the swings? she had no arms. Knock knock, who is there? Not sally.

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Why do giraffes have long necks? Evolution.

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Do you want to hear a joke? Sure. Justin Bieber is straight.

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If you have alzeimers, wait, never mind i forget.

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What is a chinese person in your house? A human being

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What's better than winning the special Olympics? Not being retarded.

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What has two wings and a halo? A chinese phone. WING WING HALO?

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A black man walks into a bar, to get a drink.

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What did the doctor say to his patient? You have cancer

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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