So there's this cup that I own... I use it to aid in the drinking of my hot or cold beverages.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What do a Shark and a lemon have in common? They can both swim, except for the lemon

thumb_up thumb_down +9

There are 2 muffins sitting in an oven. Neither of the muffins say anything because muffins can't talk.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

How can you tell if a duck is watching you? Look at its eyes

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Adam knocks on the door. Eve: who is it? Adam: Don't be silly, just open the f*cking door.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Whats the difference between andreas and a dog? the dog has a tail.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Why couldn't Peter climb the tree? Because he's a fish.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Q: how do you spell apple without any letters? A: you can't.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

A. Knock-knock. B. Who's there? A. Hey, your doorbell's broken.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

ekoj

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What is Jason? Black.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What do you do when a girl you gave roofies to wakes up? Take your tongue out of her ass and run!

thumb_up thumb_down +3

A Russian gentleman walks into a bar and requests a vodka which the bartender promptly supplies. Shortly thereafter a Turkish gentleman enters escorting a Llama on a leash and requests a vodka to which the bartender responds: "Your animal is not allowed on the premise, I am going to have to ask you to leave." The Turkish gentleman apologizes for his ignorance of the local customs and excuses himself, and shortly thereafter the Russian finishes his Vodka, pays, and leaves as well.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

your mamas so fat when she puts on a belt she has to use a bomarang to get it around her.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What do you call cheese that isn't yours? Expensive cheese.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? Japan

thumb_up thumb_down +3

you, me and i need to stop doing meth!

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What do you call an asian man driving a plane? Nothing, you cannot drive a plane you can only fly it

thumb_up thumb_down +3

why do anti jokes suck???? Because CC is Jewish and rapes orphan squirrels EJ

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What do you call a cereal killing homeless man? Roofless

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Brian: farts RJ: Who farted? Brian: Idk Why? Rj: Smells like sweet ass back here

thumb_up thumb_down +3

roses are red violets are blue i have aids and now so do you.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 has psychotic tendencies.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

This is a haiku The second line is longest Hippopotamus.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops