What is a dog? Bark

Knock, knock. Who's there? A black Russian.

The mets are 3-0 this season

what happened to the man who ran straight into a brick wall he bounced off it, fell back, stumbled. he lifted his head up, looked at it, put his arm to his head. got up, groaned, dusted himself down, and walked towards the pub.

to the one below me. YEAH RIGHT!!!!!!!!!!

Why are african american people better than caucasian people at sports like basketball? Because african american people have more high-twitch muscle fibers. Which allow them to perform Explosion type movements better than caucasian people.

If you were an octopus what would you? Say "I an octopus".

Stephen Hawking walks into a bar.

A man walked into a bar. He said "ow".

Three black men go to the basketball courts one day hoping to play some ball. On the way there they see a homeless man with a sign that says "Homeless. Anything will help." However, since they were on there way to play ball, none of them found it necessary to bring cash, thus resulting in them walking by the homeless man without giving him any money.

why was the kid named owen? Because thats what his parents wnted him to be named

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

How many Somalians can you fit in a Shopping trolley? Well rather unfortunately there is a lack of Shopping Centers in Somalia due to its corrupt government and its general poverty in comparison to a 1st world country, needless to mention the civil wars. I would guess 7 though.

A homeless man stumbles upon $100 bill. It is actually just a food wrapper, his eyesight is lackluster.

why did my girlfriend fail her test? she was pregnant :'(

One day, a mother was talking with her three daughters. "Mommy," the first one asked, "Why did you name me Daisy?" "Because when we took you home, a daisy fell on your head." "Mommy," the second one said, "Why did you name me Rose?" "Because when we took you home, a rose fell on your head." ..."MMMBBWWAAAAAGGGHH!" the third daughter cried. She was born with severe cognitive damage and is incapable of coherent speech.

A blonde, a brunette, and a red-head are trapped on a desert island together After many days without food, they resort to cannibalism. The blonde eats the brunette, and the red-head eats the blonde. The red-head eventually dies once the water supply runs out.

"I had the worst day ever!" "Was it worse than 9/11?"

Why did Susie fall off the song? She had no arms Knock Knock Who's there? Not Susie

I you beat Chuck Norris in arm wrestling, you will be proud of yourself and he will go home with nothing.

Lilys are from england violets from japan. I've got a knife now get in the van

knock, knock no one answers man goes home and shots himself because he feels alone

a priest, a bishop and a cardinal walk into bar to hand out pamphlets about alcoholism

A man was drowning in a lake and so he asked God to save him. A man on a boat came by and said to the drowning man "Do you need any help?" The drowning man said "Yes! Thank God a boat came for me!" So the man on the boat pulled the man from the water and saved him.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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