How do you keep children off your front lawn? You molest them.

Knock, knock. Who's there? Interrupting Cow. Interru--- MOO! I'm so sorry, I have Tourette's Syndrome and cannot control these sudden outbursts. Please continue.

Two guys were sitting in a pub.

I like to eat.

GRAAAAAAAR.

What's bigger than a whale and has no water? Africa.

A kid is Jackin off and his dad walks in and says if you keep jackin off you will loose your sight. the kid says dad im over here.

Steering Wheel Face.

What Do You Call A Japanese Man Humming Classicle Music While Removing Toy Soldiors From His Ear With His Foot Jumping Up And Down On A Large Elephant Strutting About The Universe? Strange.

Knock Knock? WHAT?!?!?

Freedom of Speech

A man walks into a bar and orders a beer. The bartender brings him the beer, and the man drinks it. Then the man dies in a car crash while driving back to his family

live babies

why did the chicken cross the road. why? because he felt like it

what did the boy with no arms or legs get for Christmas? cancer.

did you ever see a butter fly?

Roses are red Violets are red Tulips are red Bushes are red Trees are red Fences are red OMG MY FENCE IS ON FIRE!

what did the 0 say to the 8 nice belt

look at there!! an entire dog!!

why did susie get hit by the bus? cause the bus driver wanted her ice cream

What's the difference between medicine and astronomy ? They're different fields of studies.

What do apples taste like? Apples.

does this look unsure to you?

Why wasn't Pat able to get an erection? Because Pat is a girl.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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