Why did the sloth cross the road? To murder your whole family.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

- Knock Knock - Whos there? - No one

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Pandas Everywhere!!!

thumb_up thumb_down +17

How do you make a grilled cheese for a black guy? Butter two pieces of bread, place two slices of any kind of cheese in between the pieces of bread, then fry it in a pan with butter.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Three soldiers, one Japanese, one American, and one Italian were stuck in a desert. How did they escape? A rescue squad of thirty trained troops came down in a helicopter and brought them each to their respective homes except the Italian who was actually a Mafia boss so they put him in prison.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

There once was a man from Peru Who fell asleep in a canoe He got a slight case of sunburn which improved later after applying some ointment.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Q: What do you get when you eat all the potatoes? A: They're all gone!

thumb_up thumb_down +17

If I have $5 and Chuck Norris has $5, we both have the same monetary value.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Why don't blind people skydive? They do.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

A man was walking down the street and witnessed a car crashed. He was traumatize.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

One day three men died. Heaven had almost been full, and he wanted to see who could get in and who would burn. So the first man starts and says "well I just got home from my girlfriends house, she just dumped me. I was crazy mad, and as I was about to eat the pain away, I saw a man hanging off of my porch. I ran to the man pulled out a sledge hammer, and then smashed his hands off the balcony. And without thinking I picked up my refrigerator and threw it down at him. But sadly I fell with the refridgerator." the second man steps up and says.. "I was doing my dance routine on my porch, and I slipped on an ice cube and flipped off the rail. I took ahold of a railing on which I could puulmupmtomsaftey on, but as I was about to save my own life some psychotic man comes out with a sledge hammer and bashes my hands off the railing. After he threw his refridgerator down at me." and then the third guy says..."well I was in this refridgerator........."

thumb_up thumb_down +11

In particle-joke physics, the antijoke is the extension of the concept of the antiparticle to the joke, where the antijoke is composed of antiparticles in the same way that the normal joke is composed of particles. Furthermore, mixing jokes and antijokes can lead to the annihilation of both, in the same way that mixing antiparticles and particles does.The result of antijoke meeting jokes is an explosion.[1]

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Person 1: Knock knock. Person 2: Come in.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

A man walks into a bar... ...because he is blind.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

whats funnier than the boy with no arms and legs getting cancer? lebron playing basketball

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What do you call a homosexual with no legs or arms. Jerry

thumb_up thumb_down +3

A black guy, mexican, and asian walk into a bar. They leave soon after because they heard the "one about them"

thumb_up thumb_down +3

The chicken crossed the road.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

This is a haiku The second line is longest Hippopotamus.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Roses are red Violets are blue I have a finger And the middle ones for you

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Fish for a man, he has food for tonight. Teach a man how to fish and he will have one more skill under his belt.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Three men sat at a pub, it reminded them of this joke they once heard

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What's worse then listening to Nickleback? The Holo- On second thought, nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What's better then winning a gold medal at the special olympics? Not being retarded.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops