What do clowns put on bagels? Cream Cheese

A gay guy walks into a bar. Nothing is said to him, because homosexuality is accepted in this area.

Child Prostitution.

Why did the man go to Chinatown? Because he was hungry.

Knock, knock. Who's there? Joseph Kony. Give me your children.

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Thousands upon thousands upon thousands of dying infants.

I was walking on the beach when I heard a man yell "Help, Shark, Help!" and I laughed, because I knew the shark wasn't going to help him.

What time is it? 12:19. weren't we supposed to leave like 5 minutes ago? 4. For the mall...

What's the best part about Africa? Nothing.

Roses are red Violets are blue I have candy GET IN THE VAN NOW BEFORE SOMEBODEY SEES US!

What does the time bomb say to the idiot? Nothing, time bombs are inanimate objects and therefore can't speak.

How many ears does Captain Kirk have? Two.

how do u unload the dishwasher? u take the dishes out!

Q:What happened to the leprechaun when it jumped in the water? A:It got wet.

Two men are waiting for the traffic light to cross the road. One looks at the other and says 'Hello!' The other replies 'Hello!'

A farmer goes out to the coop to feed the chickens. They're all dead.

How do you keep children off your front lawn? You molest them.

I like to eat.

Want to hear a joke? Jerry Sandusky's innocence

What do you get when you put a dead baby and some nails in a blender? A dead baby and some nails

What's black and white, and red all over? A police car. Well, maybe it's not red all over. Just that little light on top. Oh, and the tail lights.

What did the man say to Hitler? You're a douche

a man eats at a restaraunt alone, because all the people he loved died in a tragic boating accident while he was out of town on a business trip

Yo' momma's so fat that when she steps on the scales the number seen to appear is proportionately larger than that seen to appear when the average human steps on them.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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