Two guys walk into a bar, one is treated for a concussion.

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how do you get 100 dead babies in a bucket? use a blender. how do you get 100 dead babies out of a blender? Doritio's

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Women's rights.

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What did the mole say? Nothing

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What did the police officer say to the boy in the park? your parents were killed in a car accident.

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How come Michael Jackson can draw a perfect circle? He likes little BOYS.

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what's brown and sticky? a stick.

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Which came first the chicken or the egg? The egg because if a chicken came first then that means chickens magically appeared. Eggs however may change over time through evolution by a common ancestor because after millions of years of hatching, it slowly mutated by natural selection and became to what is now known as the domestic chicken. (Applause)

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A boss walks into a bar and hires the first man he sees. He fires everyone else, no matter what their occupation.

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IF circles are squares and squares are purple and i dont know what im talking about does that make all potatoes orange?

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What is the difference between jam and jelly? Jam has chunks of fruit, jelly does not.

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A suicide bomber enters a bar. Everyone dies.

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How do you confuse and idiot? Purple.

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What happened when the chicken crossed the road? The Farmer immediately noticed the oncoming car and flagged it down so the driver would stop and he could grab his chicken and carry it safely back to the coop

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Two men walk into a bar. And they enjoy a good night of drinking beer and playing pinball.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Jeff. Jeff who? Sh*t. Wrong house.

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What do you do when you're making out with your girlfriend? Play with another dude's ass.

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A gorilla walks into the DMV to apply for a drivers license. Turns out it was just some guy in a gorilla suit doing a prank. Everybody instantly realized this at the time since gorillas aren't indigenous to the local area. They guy responsible was charged with a small fine for public mischief.

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Why don't chicken wear underwear? Because their peckers are on their face

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A man saw a dinosaur. He probably watched it on the television because dinosaurs have been extingt for a very long time.

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Q: Why isn't Michael Jordan able to jump into space with only 1 leap? A: If that were possible, the supposedly absolute laws of physics would've been irreversibly violated to the full extent that the future of science would be in trouble and the future of some already mentally-unstable people would've been deeply jeopardized to a state that they couldn't naturally recover from.

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Emma Brown..I'd tap that shit Dylan xoxo

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Chuck Norris ordered a Big Mac at Burger King. After be told politely that Big Macs were served at McDonald's and not Burger King, Chuck walked out and drove to the nearest McDonald's.

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whats worse then the worst thing that happened in your life? nothing.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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