What starts with C and ends with UNT. Ciretrunt

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What's red and puts out fires? A fire truck? Oh, you've heard this joke before.

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Black people are innocent.

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I once bought a pack of batteries but they weren't included.

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There are four worms moving in a straight line, one in front of the other. The first worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me!" The second worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me, too!" The third worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me, too!" The third worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me, too!" How can this be? ...the fourth worm lied.

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Who was the dinosaurs favorite NBA player? He didnt have one. Dinosaurs became extinct far before the NBA was established.

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How many blondes does it take to change a lightbulb? One, it's just a lightbulb

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What has two wings and a halo? A chinese phone. WING WING HALO?

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What do you call a man with no legs? A paraplegic.

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If you have alzeimers, wait, never mind i forget.

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What did the doctor say to his patient? You have cancer

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What do you call a man which busts ghosts A ghostbuster. Duh

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Why did the chicken cross the road To go to KFC

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A man asked a friend at work if he could have $100, his friend replied "sure I'll give it to you when pigs fly", that man never received $100 dollars from his friend.

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What did the man say to Hitler? You're a douche

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There once was a genie With a sevenfoot weenie And he went to the lady next door She thought it was a snake So she hit it with a rake And then he murdered the shit out of her.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he lost his grip on the branch and was unable to reach another before reaching the ground.

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Why did Justin Bieber smile in his mug shot? He did not understand the consequences of his horrible actions that could have killed many innocent men, woman, or children and, in jail, there could be very dangerous people living there.

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Brett Farve

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What's the opposite of fly? To not fly

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Two guys were sitting in a pub.

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Two parrots are in a cage. The one looks at the other one and says, "answer the phone," and the other one says, "where are my car keys."

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A dyslexic man walks into a bar He sits down and has some trouble reading the menu but orders a beer

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I'm not unemployed. I'm on sabbatical. Hey! Don't get all religous on me.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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