Whats worse than getting hit in the face with an axe? Getting hit in the face with two axes.

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What do you call a man who burns his country's flag on it's independence day? Unpatriotic

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Why couldn't Bob pick up his pen? Because a nuclear bomb just set off where he lives and it incinerated everything.

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What is big green and fuzzy and would kill you if it fell out of a tree A pool table

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A women left the kitchen.

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What do you call a full refrigerator? A freezer

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so there is a 13 year old boy who got left home while the rest of his family was driving to colorado, so the police comes to his door, and says son your whole family has just died in a plane accident. And the boy says, but my family was driving. . . the policeman then says, i'm aware, the plane act

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why was the black man running away from the convenient store? He was going for a jog and it just so happened that he passed by the store

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What did the smoker say when he coughed? Ohhh dam it's turned into a smokers cough

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WHATS BROWN AND SMELLS LIKE CRAP!?!?!?!?!?!?!? crap

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Q: how do you get an clown off a unicycle A:You hit it with a police baton

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because chickens are polemicists.

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Theres a tomatoe a cucumber and a mouth. HA

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What is black and blue and doesn't like sex? The 6 year old in my basement.

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whats worse then getting a bad present on your birthday? dying.

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Feel free to call me, forget the money, as for my fucking eye, I just sure as hell hope those responsible are rotting in prison. I mean I just lost an eye right? Just kidding, I am the one who has been dead wrong here, I judged you wrong, I am the fuck that seems to feel responsible for the actions of others at times, then again I thought that you where sending them against me, they surely claimed they where, but fuck, people use all sorts of things and people as an excuse to do whatever the hell they want.

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What do you get when you cross a chicken and a dinosaur? You can't. Dinosaurs are extinct.

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Guess what my dad got me for my birthday? NOTHING, he left my mom and I when I was a baby.

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Two muffins were in an oven. The first muffin says: 'It sure is hot in here!' The second muffin says: 'Why are they only cooking two muffins?'

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What's worse than the holocaust? nothing it was a terrible act in history

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roses are red, violets are fine, you be the six, and I'll be the nine.

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Knock Knock, Who's there? Me, get naked bitch!

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So a Priest, a rabbi, and a monk walk into the bar... And got drinks. What did you think was going to happen?

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What do you do if an elephant comes through your window? Pay For a new window

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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