I am strangling you. Do you see my arms? I AM FREAKEN STRANGLING YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!11

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How do you put in a lightbulb? Call your local electrition

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sky silverstein

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A man gets home from work with red on his collar. His wife asks what it is. The man replies "I had sex with a young woman, your to old and you disqust me"

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2 moose sitting in a tree, suddenly there came a boat and landed in the tree next to them, then said one of the moose, he probably lives there

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A man walks into a bar. He then says "ow".

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That awkward moment when you get in the van and there's no candy.

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Why was Ethan talking to the potato? Because he is stupid.

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Why did the black man take the watermelon? Because he bought it, and watermelons are delicious.

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a boy walks into a hospital ward, and procedes to break down into tears because his family died

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whats the difference between a black and a bunk bed? a bunk bed can support 2 kids.

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What did the doctor say to the lawyer? Nothing. They weren't even together. He was in the hospital saving people and the lawyer was in his office working on a case.

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A woman walks out of the kitchen.

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What's Hitler's favorite drink? Jews (meaning juice)

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How much does a polar bear weigh? It depends, but most weigh around 775 to 1,200 pounds.

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how do you keep an idiot in suspense. I dont' know he still hasn't told me

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What was the strangest part about meeting a girl called Suzie? She had arms.

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what's the square root of pi? nothing. why would you add roots to pie, how gross.

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what do you do when a blond throws a grenade at you? run

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Whats the difference........ Between a duck?

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whats the difference between marmalade and jam? you cant marmalade ur cock up a girls arse

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Old Mother Hubbard Went to the cupboard, To give the poor dog a bone: When she came there, The cupboard was bare, And so the poor dog had none. So Old Mother Hubbard was reported for animal cruelty

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Who is Dank? A: Billal

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What does 10 dead babies in a microwave look like? I dont know. I was too busy masturbating.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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