Knock Knock Who's there? You know you really should have a safer way of finding out who is really on the other side. Now a days it's just not safe to ask, "who's there". I mean it could have been, Milkman, Plummer, or worst a Land Shark!

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Black, I dont know if you are kidding around or something, but I cant reach you on the phone pal, I am really sorry about the Valium, it was like only 10 milligrams pal, I mean please man, it was a joke, and Ill break up with Line anyways, I mean Alex and Petter are sorry too okay? Just take the phone, ill be there soon, I mean come on, you are the most cruel person I know, lets talk about it

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What do a chicken and a grape have in comon? - They're both purple, except for the chicken.

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roses are red violets are blue if you and your sister were hanging from a cliff i'd save your sister

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Whats funnier than 1 dead baby? 2 Dead babies

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what do you call a white man who appears to be standing on water? a surfer

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How do you fit 100 dead babies in a box? A blender. How do you get them out? Tortilla Chips. hehehehehehe

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A man walks into a bar owned by horses. The bartender says, "Why the short face?"

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What do you call a dragon with no wings? a dragon with no wings :(

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How do you kill a baby swinging on a rope attached to a pole at 40 miles an hour? Hit it with a shovel.

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Why was the boy crying? Because him and his sister were sent to an orphanage.

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Roses are red, My name is Dave, This joke is pointless, microwave.

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Q. How many trees does it take to change a light bulb? A. Trees can't change light bulbs.

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What do a turtle an a bird have in common? They both fly except the turtle

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A morbidly overweight baby eats horse poop and dies a slow horrible death

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What does the man do to his meat? He beats it.

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whats big and can vibrate after you turn it on? A washing machine.

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Donald Trump decided to run for President.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Some poems rhyme, This one doesn't.

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How many dead babies does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Impossible, non-living organisms are incapable of moving and babies lack the brain capacity to understand how to screw in a light bulb.

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why did the boy fall over? because he was hit by a fridge that fell out of the tree.

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flashback 2010 bears vs. packers vs. bears- why did'nt the packers want to go to soldier field? because they didnt want to pass another 6 flags!

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Whats the difference between a dog and a bird? They both fly

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An Asian man walked to P.F. Changs, and asked where the bathroom is.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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