What do you get when you cross isopropil alcohol,ammonia; dish detergent fluid, water, vinegar, and lemon oil? Window Cleaner.

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why did the baby cross the road? he was stapled to the chicken

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it was a black guy a white guy a chinese guy a french guy an arab guy an irish guy and a juncky that was too much for a joke

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What did the kid with no arms and legs get for christmas? Cancer

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What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? Biting into an orange and finding a worm.

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Why was the young child dead in the middle of the road? His mother wasn't there to prevent him from chasing the ball across the road, and therefore, he ran in front of a truck

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Did you hear about the man who lost his right arm and left leg... He's ok now he's all right.

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What do you call it when you have sex with a black man? Sex

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sadf

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Why was the Jew so happy? He had a good day

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What's more fun than throwing a dead baby off a cliff? Go-carts

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What did one sausage say to the other? Nothing. Sausages don't talk...

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Roses are red. Violets are violet.

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I liked your first album but I feel that it went downhill from there. There are a few good songs on your third album though.

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Knock Knock, Who's there? Nobody..

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Jesus, Mohammed, and Moses all walk into a bar. They sit down at a table and glare at each other before turning to watch the baseball game. They support opposing teams.

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It's green, has four legs and sits in a tree. And if it falls on your head you're dead. A billiard table.

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How do you make a sandwich? Go into the kitchen and make a sandwich.

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What did the black man say to the white man? "Hi"

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Roses are red Violets are blue Sunflowers are yellow Wanna have sex?

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My friend, who has struggled with a lifelong battle against anorexia, died yesterday..." "Oh my god, I'm so sorry!" "Yeah, me too. The car ran the stoplight and it was all over...

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Why did the man fall over...he had a stroke!

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A man sees another man standing at the edge of a tall bridge looking down. Man: Don't jump! No one wants you to die. You have your whole life to live and I'm sure you will find happiness somewhere. I was once in the same position as you, questioning if god really wanted me on this earth at all. But I decided to make something of myself and now I am a very successful business man. You can do the same if you just put your mind to it and put your troubles behind you. Other man: I was just admiring the view.

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Why shouldn't you go to California? Because there are sharks there, obviously.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops