- Anti Joke

There are only three kind of people: people who can count and people that can't count

What did the Irish nun say on her deathbed? "I now realize that smoking was an unhealthy habit and I regret that I made the choice to do so." Then she died

roses are red, violets are blue, {insert name here} is f**ked up, (s)he want to have sex with you

Roses are red Violets are blue Grass is green Skies are blue

We can consider a wind turbine as a great ventilator that produces heat.

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What's the difference between Michael Jackson and Neil Armstrong? Neil Armstrong was the first man to WALK on the MOON. And Michael Jackson was a child molester.

What's a vampire's favorite dessert? Vampire's don't exist What's Helen Keller's favorite dessert? Helen Keller doesn't exist

My grandmother just called to tell me she was dying................. to have sex with me.

Roses are red Violets are blue I have 5 fingers and the middles for you

Why did the man cross the road? Because the light was red!

What do you call a giraffe driving a car? A danger to society.

Why was Cinderella so bad at ball? Isn't that sexist, making assumptions about Cinderella's sports capability when you have never seen her play sports before (because she is a fictional character) and then asking why this is true when you have no proof that it is in fact true? But I would guess the correct answer is (if she is bad at ball in the first place) that she never played ball before. Think about it. Why did you have to ask this question at all? Isn't it obvious?

One day, while a blonde was out driving her car, she ran into a truck. The truck's driver made her pull over into a parking lot and get out of the car. He took a piece of chalk and drew a circle on the pavement. He told her to stand in the middle and not leave the circle. Furious, he went over to her car and slashed the tires. The blonde got angry and called the cops, who proceeded to come and arrest him.

My Jimmy Saville advent calendar is rubbish. It only opens from 1 to 16.

What's the quickest way to a person's heart? A knife

Why did the all black baseball team beat the all white baseball team? Because the black team scored more runs than the white team.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Wanna buy some meth.

why did the hobo want cancer so badly? he really needed a haircut

Why was the uneducated black guy raped? To make this joke more risky and therefore funnier.

Justin Bieber's gay!! My butt is sexier!(;

What did the banana say to the apple? Nothing, although on a deoxyribonucleic acid level, bananas are technically sharing 50% of their genes with us, humans, but yet still have the incapability to produce its own voice. In addition, apple can't talk either due to their lack of nerves, veins, arteries, and diaphragm, therefore bananas not apple cannot produce sound.

What's worst than a worm in your apple? Finding your mom in a porno.

Why did the little girl fall off of the swing set? Because she didn't have any arms.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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