your mother is so heavily obese, she became one of the 60 million individuals in America who are obese today.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

OMG FUCKING NERDS WITH NO LIFE CAN READ ABOUT THE POWER OF YOUR Vaginal puss puss color, no but seriously, I kinda prefer unshaven, I mean if I change my opinion I just do it myself or command that you shave yourself while I put it on my cellphone while I jack off to you, making a creampie, yeah because.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Part 1 Q: what did Sally get for Christmas A: cancer Part 2 knock knock Who's there Not Sally MR

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Q.Why did Bruno Mars marry the blond? A.Because it was a beautiful night and he was looking for something DUMB to do.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What do call a fly with no legs? Dead

thumb_up thumb_down -10

whats pink, brown, and smells like a banana. monkey vomit?

thumb_up thumb_down -10

No, but I am not just an author, the important thing is, that this kid has been stopped as we speak, as I said he was selling information to several clients on the deep web, and patterns do reveal that he was selling you out piece by piece while prepared to make a run for it once he delivered the vital details. Say, did you promote this guy a bit too fast or something? Either he knows as much as you do, or otherwise he has been learning the ins and outs of your little place pretty fast.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What do you do when life gives you lemons? You eat them.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What do you call a dog with no legs? A seal.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

A fish didn't walk into a bar, because fish cannot walk.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

I asked my wife to make me a sandwich. I had forgotten she was dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

How do you write an anti-joke? With the keyboard Or voice recognition software

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Whats the difference between a truck full of bowling balls and a truck full of dead babies? You can't unload one with a pitchfork

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Whats funny and has 2 wheels The holocaust, I lied about the wheels, and the funny

thumb_up thumb_down -10

How did the Mexican cross the border? He couldn't he didn't have legs

thumb_up thumb_down -10

A man walks into a bar. He's an alcoholic and its killing his family.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

The police shouldn't have cars. They should use skateboards and use flowers as their gun. When they catch a criminal in the act, they have to hug him before sending him to prison

thumb_up thumb_down -10

A Texan, a Mexican, a Brit and a Frenchman are on a plane that begins having engine trouble. The black box was never found.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Did you know? that if you were to stretch out all your organs to see how far theyd stretch? youd die.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

whats black and yellow and screams? A bus full of black kids going over a cliff.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Why is Skrillex bad at fishing? Because he always increases the treble input in his songs, and he doesnt have a rod.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Dear Six, Please stop spreading rumors about me and nine. I hear you two also do some pretty nasty things. Love, Seven.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What did you call something that is long, hard and full of seamen? A ship.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

roses are red violets are blue me + you =the perfect 2

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops