Yo Mama is like a gas station:pump and pay.

What did little Timmy get for Christmas after he was diagnosed with leukemia? A gift card to Bed Bath and Beyond because he was interested in redecorating.

What do Barney and a butchers knife have in common? One of them is purple

What's worse than your console not switching on? A mutilated body.

Knock Knock... Who's there? Nine... Nine who? Nine Eleven.

Why does Magic Johnson have to use extra-large condoms? Because he's got a giant dick and HIV.

How does Batman's mother call him to dinner? She doesn't, she's dead.

What's worse then three frogs playing leap frog? Nothing that would be awesome

How did a monkey fall out of a tree? He slipped on a banana.

Why did the black guy not like oreos? because he is a very health concious person and knowes that too much of a bad thing can make you fat.

Why did i write an antijoke? Because i can't write real jokes.

What is the difference between john madsen and a gay person. There isn't because john is gay

Why did the little girl fall from the swing? She's got no arms.

What goes down well with whiskey? Pedestrians

what is worse finding a worm in your apple? Finding a grub in your apple.

What did the Dildo say to the banana? Nothing, unless you're high on acid.

theres a taco and a blonde...who eats who? the blonde eats the taco.

But I don't use all those things myself Nero, I do however teach people how to use it.

April showers bring... tornadoes that kill families

What do call the time things don't go the way you plan them? Reality. bitch

what can keep u alive for many years- -not being shot

I named my son ps2 controller

Q: How did Helen Keller cross the street? A: She walked.

Why is it bad luck for a black cat to cross your path? I'll tell you in Heaven

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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