Coach walks into a bar and asks for a drink. The bartender says, i can't serve you. You aren't wearing pants. Coach says "put it on my bill."

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If you are American when you walk into a bathroom and American when you walk back out, what are you when you are inside the bathroom? You're probably dispelling waste products from your body.

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Roses are grey, Violets are grey, Everything's grey, I'm a dog.

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You go to the Anti Joke website, what do you find under the "newest" section? Black jokes.

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I Have a Black Friend

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A group of 8 paintbal professionals land on an island to battle another paintball team. The team is then faced by a challeng of the other team ambushing them. Everyone is okay and not touched. A case breaks the window of the bus they hide in. They open the case and find a bullet proof vest. A man placed the vest on himself. They made it one by one out of the bus and to the otherside of the field the man with the vest was shot and started going... eghegeheghdjrhherbehgh and they pulled out a real gun bulet. They were now under attack by an enemy with real amunation. Then next man to run across the fied was killed. Tehy ran fr their lives.

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Q. Why did the little boy fall off the swing? A. Because he has no arms.

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Why is the old lady crying? I threw a fridge at her.

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A black man goes outside to shoot some hoops. He misses all of them because not all blacks are good at basketball.

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What does an Asian person with 3 eyes have? A birth defect.

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bangers and mash?

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What did the banana say to the apple? Nothing, although on a deoxyribonucleic acid level, bananas are technically sharing 50% of their genes with us, humans, but yet still have the incapability to produce its own voice. In addition, apple can't talk either due to their lack of nerves, veins, arteries, and diaphragm, therefore bananas not apple cannot produce sound.

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What's funny about Magic Johnson's T-Cell count? Nothing. He has AIDS, and it's a degenerative disease, that will eventually result in death. There's nothing funny about that.

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What's the quickest way to a person's heart? A knife

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Why did the man cross the road? Because he was applying for a job that's building was located on the other side of the street.

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Q: what did the dog say to the cat? A: nothing dogs can't talk

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what did the cat say to the potato? meow

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It's really irrelevant when you realize this joke is about a suicidal chicken...

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What is the difference between a black man and a bench? The bench is a piece of wood, while the black man is a human being.

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The man was so nice It's too bad he couldn't hear the bus coming.

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What does AIDS smell like? AIDS has no smell. AIDS is a diease contracted though sexual contact with another being with the diease. It greatly increases the risk of infections and malignancy. Although AIDS has no smell, in the final stages large sores develope on the surface of the skin. This means you are going to die. Thus, HIV/AIDS has no smell.

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Johny got a iphone ipad and a macbook. He bragged to his friend. His friend said, i got an apple.

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What do you call a boomerang that doesn't come back? A stick.

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A man walked into a bar. He got a concussion and couldn't see strait for days.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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