When is a Jewish persons bedtime? When the brain releases endorphins, causing drowsiness, which usually leads one to sleep.

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What do a chicken and a grape have in comon? - They're both purple, except for the chicken.

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A duck walks into a bar and orders a drink. The bartender doesn't understand him because he doesn't speak duck and promptly calls animal control to have the duck removed.

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Two peanuts were walking down the street, one was assaulted, the other was brutally raped.

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A man in a state penitentiary drops his soap. He then picks it up and continues his shower.

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Knock knock. Whos there? I am you dumbass im standing right next to you.

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Have you heard the one about the fat woman and the dead baby? The woman was actually pregnant, not fat, and just had a miscarriage.

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How did the man kill the black fly? He called the KKK fly and had it lynch the black fly

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do you know who loves getting fisted? sock puppets

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If life hands you melons. Your probably dyslectic.

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Q: What is white, and comes out of a woman? A: No, milk you perve

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Q. What did the blond say when she woke up? A. I don"t know. I wasn't there.

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Q: What did blue say to red? A: Let's make some purple

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What has two legs and oinks? Half a pig.

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Why did the Asian man have to sit down to pee? Because he had no legs.

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Nock Nock Whose there? Your mom. Stop locking your door.

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How many kids does it take to get a day off of school? ...26

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A man runs into a bar, sits down in a hurry and demands a beer from the bartender. The bartender looks at him wearily, but shrugs, pours him a beer and sets it down in front of him. The fat naked man then drinks the beer and leaves.

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If at first you don't succeed, go kill yourself

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Who found Anne Frank? The Nazis

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-I have an idea! Let's play twenty questions! -Alright! But i have to warn u I have piss running down my leg

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if you fall, I'll be there. -floor

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So a baby seal walks into a club.

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What did the monkey say to the newlywed couple? Eiiiiijajajaajaja EIIIIJAAAA

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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