What's read,bubbly and looks out the window? A baby in a microwave

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Are you ready kids "Aye Aye Captain" I Can't hear you "AYE AYE CAPTAIN" Ohh... Who lives in a pineapple under the sea "Spongebob squarepants" Absorbant and yellow and porous is he "Spongebob Squarepants" If nautical nonsense be something you wish "Spongebob Squarepants" Then drop on the deck and flop like a fish "Spongebob Squarepants" READY Spongebob squarepants Spongebob squarepants Spongebob squarepants SPONGEBOB SQUAREPANTS!

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yo mama is so fat she has more rolls than basken robins does flavors

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Why did the man drink a glass of water? Why not?

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haha

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A Jew walks into Macy's

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What did the one Lame say to the other Lame? I don't know, what did you say?

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Why didn't the skeleton cross the road? Answer: because he had no guts

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q. why did the guy forget what he did at the paty last night? a. because he had short term memory loss

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Whats worse than one bee? Two bees. Whats worse than two bees? The holocaust. Whats worse than the holocaust? Three bees.

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What's the difference between an alligator and an argyle sweater? There are far too many conceivable differences between the two objects to be able to give an actual definite variance between them.

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Bob was in trouble. He forgot his wedding anniversary. His wife was really angry. She told him "Tomorrow morning, I expect to find a gift in the driveway that goes from 0 to 200 in 6 seconds and it better be there!!" The next morning he got up early and told his wife to come to the driveway. He quickly pulled out a .44 Magnum and murdered her violently. The marriage had been a nightmare ever since they lost their unborn child, and the situation pushed Bob to a place, where he could no longer look at his wife.

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What do you get when you cross a helicopter, elephant, and a rhino? Heliphino

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your mom was so fat that she died.

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There's a 4 door kayak going down the street and it loses a wing. How many doughnuts fit in a dog house? And remember its not yellow, because snakes don't have armpits.

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#If you go down in the woods today, your sure of a big surprise #If you go down in the woods today, you better go in disguise. # I don't know why, I started typing this out and realized I couldn't actually come up with a suitable concluding line.

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Yo mama is so old, the bone structure of her spine has decayed significantly since she stopped growing and has therefore shrunken in height considerably. Her face and hands have accumulated abundant visual wear; wrinkles, and has arthritis as well.

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Why did the girl fall of her bike? Because she got hit by a fridge!

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What does NASCAR stand for? Non-athletic sport centered around rednecks.

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What was the only reason a ginger ever won in a fight? It was against a Dementor.

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What did the chicken say when it layed the square egg? Ouch.

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Hey Bill, did you know we have a black guy in our family tree? Really? Yeah, he's still hanging there

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What do you call a man having sex with his own mother. - Gross.

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What page are you on The gay page.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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